Chapter I: 1720-1742
His Birth and Parentage - Some Account of the Operations of Divine Grace
on his Mind in his Youth - His first Appearance in the Ministry - And his
Considerations, while Young, on the Keeping of Slaves.
I
have often felt a motion of love to leave some hints in writing of my
experience of the goodness of God, and now, in the thirty-sixth of my age, I
begin this work.
I
was born in Northampton, in Burlington County, West Jersey, in the year 1720.
Before I was seven years old I began to be acquainted with the operations of
Divine love. Through the care of my parents, I was taught to read nearly as
soon as I was capable of it; and as I went from school one day, I remember that
while my companions were playing by the way, I went forward out of sight, and,
sitting down, I read the twenty-second chapter of Revelation: "He showed
me a pure river of water of life, clear as crystal, proceeding out of the
throne of God and of the Lamb, &c." In reading it, my mind was drawn
to seek after that pure habitation which I then believed God had prepared for
his servants. The place where I sat, and the sweetness that attended my mind,
remain fresh in my memory. This, and the like gracious visitations, had such an
effect upon me that when boys used ill language it troubled me; and, through
the continued mercies of God, I was preserved from that evil.
The
pious instructions of my parents were often fresh in my mind, when I happened
to be among wicked children, and were of use to me. Having a large family of
children, they used frequently, on first-days, after meeting, to set us one
after another to read the Holy Scriptures, or some religious books, the rest
sitting by without much conversation; I have since often thought it was a good
practice. From what I had read and heard, I believed there had been, in past
ages, people who walked in uprightness before God in a degree exceeding any
that I knew or heard of now living: and the apprehension of there being less
steadiness and firmness amongst people in the present age often troubled me
while I was a child.
I
may here mention a remarkable circumstance that occurred in my childhood. On
going to a neighbor's house, I saw on the way a robin sitting on her nest, and
as I came near she went off; but having young ones, she flew about, and with
many cries expressed her concern for them. I stood and threw stones at her, and
one striking her she fell down dead. At first I was pleased with the exploit,
but after a few minutes was seized with horror, at having, in a sportive way,
killed an innocent creature while she was careful for her young. I beheld her
lying dead, and thought those young ones, for which she was so careful, must
now perish for want of their dam to nourish them. After some painful
considerations on the subject, I climbed up the tree, took all the young birds,
and killed them, supposing that better than to leave them to pine away and die
miserably. In this case I believed that Scripture proverb was fulfilled,
"The tender mercies of the wicked are cruel." I then went on my
errand, and for some hours could think of little else but the cruelties I had
committed, and was much troubled. Thus He whose tender mercies are over all his
works hath placed a principle in the human mind, which incites to exercise
goodness towards every living creature; and this being singly attended to,
people become tender-hearted and sympathizing; but when frequently and totally
rejected, the mind becomes shut up in a contrary disposition.
About
the twelfth year of my age, my father being abroad, my mother reproved me for
some misconduct, to which I made an undutiful reply. The next first-day, as I
was with my father returning from meeting, he told me that he understood I had
behaved amiss to my mother, and advised me to be more careful in future. I knew
myself blamable, and in shame and confusion remained silent. Being thus
awakened to a sense of my wickedness, I felt remorse in my mind, and on getting
home I retired and prayed to the Lord to forgive me, and I do not remember that
I ever afterwards spoke unhandsomely to either of my parents, however foolish
in some other things.
Having
attained the age of sixteen years, I began to love wanton company and though I
was preserved from profane language or scandalous conduct, yet I perceived a
plant in me which produced much wild grapes: my merciful Father did not,
however, forsake me utterly, but at times, through his grace, I was brought
seriously to consider my ways; and the sight of my backslidings affected me
with sorrow, yet for want of rightly attending to the reproofs of instruction,
vanity was added to vanity, and repentance of repentance. Upon the whole, my
mind became more and more alienated from the truth, and I hastened toward
destruction. While I meditate on the gulf towards which I travelled, and
reflect on my youthful disobedience, for these things I weep, mine eye runneth
down with water.
Advancing
in age, the number of my acquaintance increased, and thereby my way grew more
difficult. Though I had found comfort in reading the Holy Scriptures and
thinking on heavenly things, I was now estranged therefrom. I knew I was going
from the flock of Christ and had no resolution to return, hence serious
reflections were uneasy to me, and youthful vanities and diversions were my
greatest pleasure. In this road I found many like myself, and we associated in
that which is adverse to true friendship.
In
this swift race it pleased God to visit me with sickness, so that I doubted of
recovery; then did darkness, horror, and amazement with full force seize me,
even when my pain and distress of body were very great. I thought it would have
been better for me never to have had being, than to see the day which I now
saw. I was filled with confusion, and in great affliction, both of mind and
body, I lay and bewailed myself. I had not confidence to lift up my cries to
God, whom I had thus offended; but in a deep sense of my great folly I was
humbled before him. At length that word which is as a fire and a hammer broke
and dissolved my rebellious heart; my cries were put up in contrition; and in
the multitude of his mercies I found inward relief, and a close engagement that
if he was pleased to restore my health I might walk humbly before him.
After
my recovery this exercise remained with me a considerable time, but by degrees
giving way to youthful vanities, and associating with wanton young people, I
lost ground. The Lord had been very gracious, and spoke peace to me in the time
of my distress, and I now most ungratefully turned again to folly; at times I
felt sharp reproof, but I did not get low enough to cry for help. I was not so
hardy as to commit things scandalous, but to exceed in vanity and to promote
mirth was my chief study. Still I retained a love and esteem for pious people,
and their company brought an awe upon me. My dear parents several times
admonished me in the fear of the Lord, and their admonition entered into my
heart and had a good effect for a season; but not getting deep enough to pray
rightly, the tempter, when he came, found entrance. Once having spent a part of
the day in wantonness, when I went to bed at night there lay in a window near my
bed a Bible, which I opened, and first cast my eye on the text, "We lie
down in our shame, and our confusion covereth us." This I knew to be my
case, and meeting with so unexpected a reproof I was somewhat affected with it,
and went to bed under remorse of conscience, which I soon cast off again.
Thus
time passed on; my heart was replenished with mirth and wantonness, while
pleasing scenes of vanity were presented to my imagination, till I attained the
age of eighteen years, near which time I felt the judgments of God in my soul,
like a consuming fire, and looking over my past life the prospect was moving. I
was often sad, and longed to be delivered from those vanities; then again my
heart was strongly inclined to them, and there was in me a sore conflict. At
times I turned to folly, and then again sorrow and confusion took hold of me.
In a while I resolved totally to leave off some of my vanities, but there was a
secret reserve in my heart of the more refined part of them, and I was not low
enough to find true peace. Thus for some months I had great troubles; my will
was unsubjected, which rendered my labors fruitless. At length, through the
merciful continuance of heavenly visitations, I was made to bow down in spirit
before the Lord. One evening I had spent some time in reading a pious author,
and walking out alone I humbly prayed to the Lord for his help, that I might be
delivered from all those vanities which so ensnared me. Thus being brought low,
he helped me, and as I learned to bear the cross I felt refreshment to come
from his presence, but not keeping in that strength which gave victory I lost
ground again, the sense of which greatly affected me. I sought deserts and
lonely places, and there with tears did confess my sins to God and humbly
craved his help. And I may say with reverence, he was near to me in my
troubles, and in those times of humiliation opened my ear to discipline. I was
now led to look seriously at the means by which I was drawn from the pure
truth, and learned that if I would live such a life as the faithful servants of
God lived, I must not go into company as heretofore in my own will, but all the
cravings of sense must be governed by a Divine principle. In times of sorrow
and abasement these instructions were sealed upon me, and I felt the power of
Christ prevail over selfish desires, so that I was preserved in a good degree
of steadiness, and being young, and believing at that time that a single life
was best for me, I was strengthened to keep from such company as had often been
a snare to me.
I
kept steadily to meetings, spent first-day afternoons chiefly in reading the
Scriptures and other good books, and was early convinced in my mind that true
religion consisted in an inward life, wherein the heart does love and reverence
God the Creator, and learns to exercise true justice and goodness, not only
toward all men, but also toward the brute creatures; that, as the mind was
moved by an inward principle to love God as an invisible, incomprehensible
Being, so, by the same principle, it was moved to love him in all his
manifestations in the visible world; that, as by his breath the flame of life
was kindled in all animal sensible creatures, to say we love God as unseen, and
at the same time exercise cruelty toward the least creature moving by his life,
or by life derived from him, was a contradiction in itself. I found no
narrowness respecting sects and opinions, but believed that sincere,
upright-hearted people, in every society, who truly love God, were accepted of
him.
As
I lived under the cross, and simply followed the opening of truth, my mind,
from day to day, was more enlightened, my former acquaintance were left to
judge of me as they would, for I found it safest for me to live in private, and
keep these things sealed up in my own breast. While I silently ponder on that
change wrought in me, I find no language equal to convey to another a clear
idea of it. I looked upon the works of God in this visible creation, and an
awfulness covered me. My heart was tender and often contrite, and universal
love to my fellow-creatures increased in me. This will be understood by such as
have trodden in the same path. Some glances of real beauty may be seen in their
faces who dwell in true meekness. There is a harmony in the sound of that voice
to which Divine love gives utterance, and some appearance of right order in
their temper and conduct whose passions are regulated; yet these do not fully
show forth that inward life to those who have not felt it; this white stone and
new name is only known rightly by such as receive it.
Now,
though I had been thus strengthened to bear the cross, I still found myself in
great danger, having many weaknesses attending me, and strong temptations to
wrestle with; in the feeling whereof I frequently withdrew into private places,
and often with tears besought the Lord to help me, and his gracious ear was
open to my cry.
All
this time I lived with my parents, and wrought on the plantation; and having
had schooling pretty well for a planter, I used to improve myself in winter
evenings, and other leisure times. Being now in the twenty-first year of my
age, with my father's consent I engaged with a man, in much business as a
shop-keeper and baker, to tend shop and keep books. At home I had lived
retired; and now having a prospect of being much in the way of company, I felt
frequent and fervent cries in my heart to God, the Father of Mercies, that he
would preserve me from all taint and corruption; that, in this more public
employment, I might serve him, my gracious Redeemer, in that humility and
self-denial which I had in a small degree exercised in a more private life.
The
man who employed me furnished a shop in Mount Holly, about five miles from my
father's house, and six from his own, and there I lived alone and tended his
shop. Shortly after my settlement here I was visited by several young people,
my former acquaintance, who supposed that vanities would be as agreeable to me
now as ever. At these times I cried to the Lord in secret for wisdom and
strength; for I felt myself encompassed with difficulties, and had fresh
occasion to bewail the follies of times past, in contracting a familiarity with
libertine people; and as I had now left my father's house outwardly, I found my
Heavenly Father to be merciful to me beyond what I can express.
By
day I was much amongst people, and had many trials to go through; but in the
evenings I was mostly alone, and I may with thankfulness acknowledge, that in
those times the spirit of supplication was often poured upon me; under which I
was frequently exercised, and felt my strength renewed.
After
a while, my former acquaintance gave over expecting me as one of their company,
and I began to be known to some whose conversation was helpful to me. And now,
as I had experienced the love of God, through Jesus Christ, to redeem me from
many pollutions, and to be a succor to me through a sea of conflicts, with
which no person was fully acquainted, and as my heart was often enlarged in
this heavenly principle, I felt a tender compassion for the youth who remained
entangled in snares like those which had entangled me. This love and tenderness
increased, and my mind was strongly engaged for the good of my
fellow-creatures. I went to meetings in an awful frame of mind, and endeavored
to be inwardly acquainted with the language of the true Shepherd. One day,
being under a strong exercise of spirit, I stood up and said some words in a
meeting; but not keeping close to the Divine opening, I said more than was
required of me. Being soon sensible of my error, I was afflicted in mind some
weeks, without any light or comfort, even to that degree that I could not take
satisfaction in anything. I remembered God, and was troubled, and in the depth
of my distress he had pity upon me, and sent the Comforter. I then felt
forgiveness for my offence; my mind became calm and quiet, and I was truly
thankful to my gracious Redeemer for his mercies. About six weeks after this,
feeling the spring of Divine love opened, and a concern to speak, I said a few
words in a meeting, in which I found peace. Being thus humbled and disciplined
under the cross, my understanding became more strengthened to distinguish the
pure spirit which inwardly moves upon the heart, and which taught me to wait in
silence sometimes many weeks together, until I felt that rise which prepares
the creature to stand like a trumpet, through which the Lord speaks to his
flock.
From
an inward purifying, and steadfast abiding under it springs a lively operative
desire for the good of others. All the faithful are not called to the public
ministry; but whoever are, are called to minister of that which they have
tasted and handled spiritually. The outward modes of worship are various; but
whenever any are true ministers of Jesus Christ, it is from the operation of his
Spirit upon their hearts, first purifying them, and thus giving them a just
sense of the conditions of others. This truth was early fixed in my mind, and I
was taught to watch the pure opening, and to take heed lest, while I was
standing to speak, my own will should get uppermost, and cause me to utter
words from worldly wisdom, and depart from the channel of the true gospel
ministry.
In
the management of my outward affairs, I may say with thankfulness, I found
truth to be my support; and I was respected in my master's family, who came to
live in Mount Holly within two years after my going there.
In
a few months after I came here, my master bought several Scotchmen servants,
from on board a vessel, and brought them to Mount Holly to sell, one of whom
was taken sick and died. In the latter part of his sickness, being delirious,
he used to curse and swear most sorrowfully; and the next night after his
burial I was left to sleep alone in the chamber where he died. I perceived in
me a timorousness; I knew, however, I had not injured the man, but assisted in
taking care of him according to my capacity. I was not free to ask any one on
that occasion to sleep with me. Nature was feeble; but every trial was a fresh
incitement to give myself up wholly to the service of God, for I found no
helper like him in times of trouble.
About
the twenty-third year of my age, I had many fresh and heavenly openings, in
respect to the care and providence of the Almighty over his creatures in
general, and over man as the most noble amongst those which are visible. And
being clearly convinced in my judgment that to place my whole trust in God was
best for me, I felt renewed engagements that in all things I might act on an
inward principle of virtue, and pursue worldly business no further than as
truth opened my way.
About
the time called Christmas I observed many people, both in town and from the
country, resorting to public-houses, and spending their time in drinking and
vain sports, tending to corrupt one another; on which account I was much
troubled. At one house in particular there was much disorder; and I believed it
was a duty incumbent on me to speak to the master of that house. I considered I
was young, and that several elderly friends in town had opportunity to see
these things; but though I would gladly have been excused, yet I could not feel
my mind clear.
The
exercise was heavy; and as I was reading what the Almighty said to Ezekiel,
respecting his duty as a watchman, the matter was set home more clearly. With
prayers and tears I besought the Lord for his assistance, and He, in
loving-kindness, gave me a resigned heart. At a suitable opportunity I went to
the public-house; and seeing the man amongst much company, I called him aside,
and in the fear and dread of the Almighty expressed to him what rested on my
mind. He took it kindly, and afterwards showed more regard to me than before.
In a few years afterwards he died, middle-aged; and I often thought that had I
neglected my duty in that case it would have given me great trouble; and I was
humbly thankful to my gracious Father, who had supported me herein.
My
employer, having a negro woman,1 sold her, and desired me to write a
bill of sale, the man being waiting who bought her. The thing was sudden; and
though I felt uneasy at the thoughts of writing an instrument of slavery for
one of my fellow-creatures, yet I remembered that I was hired by the year, that
it was my master who directed me to do it, and that it was an elderly man, a
member of our Society, who bought her; so through weakness I gave way, and
wrote it; but at the executing of it I was so afflicted in my mind, that I said
before my master and the Friend that I believed slave-keeping to be a practice
inconsistent with the Christian religion. This, in some degree, abated my
uneasiness; yet as often as I reflected seriously upon it I thought I should
have been clearer if I had desired to be excused from it, as a thing against my
conscience; for such it was. Some time after this a young man of our Society
spoke to me to write a conveyance of a slave to him, he having lately taken a
negro into his house. I told him I was not easy to write it; for, though many
of our meeting and in other places kept slaves, I still believed the practice
was not right, and desired to be excused from the writing. I spoke to him in
goodwill; and he told me that keeping slaves was not altogether agreeable to
his mind; but that the slave being a gift made to his wife he had accepted her.
[Footnote
1: The number of slaves in New Jersey at this time must have been considerable,
for even as late as 1800 there were over 12,000 of them. The newly imported
Africans were deposited at Perth Amboy. In 1734 there were enough of them to
make a formidable though unsuccessful insurrection.]
Chapter II: 1743-1748
His first Journey, on a Religious Visit, in East Jersey - Thoughts on
Merchandising, and Learning a Trade - Second Journey into Pennsylvania,
Maryland, Virginia, and North Carolina - Third Journey through part of West and
East Jersey - Fourth Journey through New York and Long Island, to New England -
And his fifth Journey to the Eastern Shore of Maryland, and the Lower Counties
on Delaware.
My
esteemed friend Abraham Farrington being about to make a visit to Friends on
the eastern side of this province, and having no companion, he proposed to me
to go with him; and after a conference with some elderly Friends I agreed to
go. We set out on the 5th of ninth month, 1743; had an evening meeting at a
tavern in Brunswick, a town in which none of our Society dwelt; the room was
full, and the people quiet. Thence to Amboy, and had an evening meeting in the
court-house, to which came many people, amongst whom were several members of
Assembly, they being in town on the public affairs of the province. In both
these meetings my ancient companion was engaged to preach largely in the love
of the gospel. Thence we went to Woodbridge, Rahway, and Plainfield, and had
six or seven meetings in places where Friends' meetings are not usually held,
chiefly attended by Presbyterians, and my beloved companion was frequently
strengthened to publish the word of life amongst them. As for me, I was often
silent through the meetings, and when I spake it was with much care, that I
might speak only what truth opened. My mind was often tender, and I learned
some profitable lessons. We were out about two weeks.
Near
this time, being on some outward business in which several families were
concerned, and which was attended with difficulties, some things relating
thereto not being clearly stated, nor rightly understood by all, there arose
some heat in the minds of the parties, and one valuable friend got off his
watch. I had a great regard for him, and felt a strong inclination, after
matters were settled, to speak to him concerning his conduct in that case; but
being a youth, and he far advanced in age and experience, my way appeared
difficult; after some days' deliberation, and inward seeking to the Lord for
assistance, I was made subject, so that I expressed what lay upon me in a way
which became my youth and his years; and though it was a hard task to me it was
well taken, and I believe was useful to us both.
Having
now been several years with my employer, and he doing less in merchandise than
heretofore, I was thoughtful about some other way of business, perceiving
merchandise to be attended with much cumber in the way of trading in these
parts.
My
mind, through the power of truth, was in a good degree weaned from the desire
of outward greatness, and I was learning to be content with real conveniences,
that were not costly, so that a way of life free from much entanglement
appeared best for me, though the income might be small. I had several offers of
business that appeared profitable, but I did not see my way clear to accept of
them, believing they would be attended with more outward care and cumber than
was required of me to engage in. I saw that an humble man, with the blessing of
the Lord, might live on a little, and that where the heart was set on
greatness, success in business did not satisfy the craving; but that commonly
with an increase of wealth the desire of wealth increased. There was a care on
my mind so to pass my time that nothing might hinder me from the most steady
attention to the voice of the true Shepherd.
My
employer, though now a retailer of goods, was by trade a tailor, and kept a
servant-man at that business; and I began to think about learning the trade,
expecting that if I should settle I might by this trade and a little retailing
of goods get a living in a plain way, without the load of great business. I
mentioned it to my employer, and we soon agreed on terms, and when I had
leisure from the affairs of merchandise I worked with his man. I believed the
hand of Providence pointed out this business for me, and I was taught to be
content with it, though I felt at times a disposition that would have sought
for something greater; but through the revelation of Jesus Christ I had seen
the happiness of humility, and there was an earnest desire in me to enter
deeply into it; at times this desire arose to a degree of fervent supplication,
wherein my soul was so environed with heavenly light and consolation that
things were made easy to me which had been otherwise.
After
some time my employer's wife died; she was a virtuous woman, and generally
beloved of her neighbors. Soon after this he left shop-keeping, and we parted.
I then wrought at my trade as a tailor; carefully attended meetings for worship
and discipline; and found an enlargement of gospel love in my mind, and therein
a concern to visit Friends in some of the back settlements of Pennsylvania and
Virginia. Being thoughtful about a companion, I expressed it to my beloved
friend, Isaac Andrews, who told me that he had drawings to the same places, and
also to go through Maryland, Virginia, and Carolina. After a considerable time,
and several conferences with him, I felt easy to accompany him throughout, if
way opened for it. I opened the case in our Monthly Meeting, and, Friends
expressing their unity therewith, we obtained certificates to travel as
companions, - he from Haddonfield, and I from Burlington.
We
left our province on the 12th of third month, 1746, and had several meetings in
the upper part of Chester County, and near Lancaster; in some of which the love
of Christ prevailed, uniting us together in his service. We then crossed the
river Susquehanna, and had several meetings in a new settlement, called the Red
Lands. It is the poorer sort of people that commonly begin to improve remote
deserts; with a small stock they have houses to build, lands to clear and
fence, corn to raise, clothes to provide, and children to educate, so that
Friends who visit such may well sympathize with them in their hardships in the
wilderness; and though the best entertainment that they can give may seem
coarse to some who are used to cities or old settled places, it becomes the
disciples of Christ to be therewith content. Our hearts were sometimes enlarged
in the love of our Heavenly Father amongst these people, and the sweet
influence of his Spirit supported us through some difficulties: to him be the
praise.
We
passed on to Manoquacy, Fairfax, Hopewell, and Shanando, and had meetings, some
of which were comfortable and edifying. From Shanando, we set off in the
afternoon for the settlements of Friends in Virginia; the first night we, with
our guide, lodged in the woods, our horses feeding near us; but he being poorly
provided with a horse, and we young, and having good horses, were free the next
day to part with him. In two days after we reached our friend John Cheagle's,
in Virginia. We took the meetings in our way through Virginia; were in some
degree baptized into a feeling sense of the conditions of the people, and our
exercise in general was more painful in these old settlements than it had been
amongst the back inhabitants; yet through the goodness of our Heavenly Father
the well of living waters was at times opened to our encouragement, and the
refreshment of the sincere-hearted. We went on to Perquimans, in North
Carolina; had several large meetings, and found some openness in those parts,
and a hopeful appearance amongst the young people. Afterwards we turned again
to Virginia, and attended most of the meetings which we had not been at before,
laboring amongst Friends in the love of Jesus Christ, as ability was given;
thence went to the mountains, up James River to a new settlement, and had
several meetings amongst the people, some of whom had lately joined in
membership with our Society. In our journeying to and fro, we found some
honest-hearted Friends, who appeared to be concerned for the cause of truth
among a backsliding people.
From
Virginia we crossed over the river Potomac, at Hoe's Ferry, and made a general
visit to the meetings of Friends on the western shore of Maryland, and were at their
Quarterly Meeting. We had some hard labor amongst them, endeavoring to
discharge our duty honestly as way opened, in the love of truth. Thence, taking
sundry meetings in our way, we passed towards home, which, through the favor of
Divine Providence, we reached the 16th of sixth month, 1746; and I may say,
that through the assistance of the Holy Spir t, which mortifies selfish
desires, my companion and I travelled in harmony, and parted in the nearness of
true brotherly love.
Two
things were remarkable to me in this journey: first, in regard to my
entertainment. When I ate, drank, and lodged free-cost with people who lived in
ease on the hard labor of their slaves I felt uneasy; and as my mind was inward
to the Lord, I found this uneasiness return upon me, at times, through the
whole visit. Where the masters bore a good share of the burden, and lived
frugally, so that their servants were well provided for, and their labor
moderate, I felt more easy; but where they lived in a costly way, and laid
heavy burdens on their slaves, my exercise was often great, and I frequently
had conversation with them in private concerning it. Secondly, this trade of
importing slaves from their native country being much encouraged amongst them,
and the white people and their children so generally living without much labor,
was frequently the subject of my serious thoughts. I saw in these southern
provinces so many vices and corruptions, increased by this trade and this way
of life, that it appeared to me as a dark gloominess hanging over the land; and
though now many willingly run into it, yet in future the consequence will be
grievous to posterity. I express it as it hath appeared to me, not once, nor
twice, but as a matter fixed on my mind.
Soon
after my return home I felt an increasing concern for Friends on our seacoast;
and on the 8th of eighth month, 1746, I left home with the unity of Friends,
and in company with my beloved friend and neighbor Peter Andrews, brother to my
companion before mentioned, and visited them in their meetings generally about
Salem, Cape May, Great and Little Egg Harbor; we had meetings also at Barnagat,
Manahockin, and Mane Squan, and so to the Yearly Meeting at Shrewsbury. Through
the goodness of the Lord way was opened, and the strength of Divine love was
sometimes felt in our assemblies, to the comfort and help of those who were
rightly concerned before him. We were out twenty-two days, and rode, by
computation, three hundred and forty miles. At Shrewsbury Yearly Meeting we met
with our dear friends Michael Lightfoot and Abraham Farrington, who had good
service there.
The
winter following died my eldest sister Elizabeth Woolman, of the small-pox,
aged thirty-one years.
Of
late I found drawings in my mind to visit Friends in New England, and having an
opportunity of joining in company with my beloved friend Peter Andrews, we
obtained certificates from our Monthly Meeting, and set forward on the 16th of
third month, 1747. We reached the Yearly Meeting at Long Island, at which were
our friends, Samuel Nottingham from England, John Griffith, Jane Hoskins, and
Elizabeth Hudson from Pennsylvania, and Jacob Andrews from Chesterfield,
several of whom were favored in their public exercise; and, through the
goodness of the Lord, we had some edifying meetings. After this my companion
and I visited Friends on Long Island; and through the mercies of God we were
helped in the work.
Besides
going to the settled meetings of Friends, we were at a general meeting at
Setawket, chiefly made up of other societies; we had also a meeting at Oyster
Bay in a dwelling-house, at which were many people. At the former there was not
much said by way of testimony, but it was, I believe, a good meeting; at the
latter, through the springing up of living waters, it was a day to be thankfully
remembered. Having visited the island, we went over to the main, taking
meetings in our way, to Oblong, Nine-partners, and New Milford. In these back
settlements we met with several people who, through the immediate workings of
the Spirit of Christ on their minds, were drawn from the vanities of the world
to an inward acquaintance with him. They were educated in the way of the
Presbyterians. A considerable number of the youth, members of that society,
used often to spend their time together in merriment, but some of the principal
young men of the company, being visited by the powerful workings of the Spirit
of Christ, and thereby led humbly to take up his cross, could no longer join in
those vanities. As these stood steadfast to that inward convincement, they were
made a blessing to some of their former companions; so that through the power
of truth several were brought into a close exercise concerning the eternal
well-being of their souls. These young people continued for a time to frequent
their public worship; and, besides that, had meetings of their own, which
meetings were awhile allowed by their preacher, who sometimes met with them;
but in time their judgment in matters of religion disagreeing with some of the
articles of the Presbyterians their meetings were disapproved by that society;
and such of them as stood firm to their duty, as it was inwardly manifested,
had many difficulties to go through. In a while their meetings were dropped;
some of them returned to the Presbyterians, and others joined to our religious
society.
I
had conversation with some of the latter to my help and edification, and
believe several of them are acquainted with the nature of that worship which is
performed in spirit and in truth. Amos Powel, a friend from Long Island,
accompanied me through Connecticut, which is chiefly inhabited by
Presbyterians, who were generally civil to us. After three days' riding, we
came amongst Friends in the colony of Rhode Island, and visited them in and
about Newport, Dartmouth, and generally in those parts; we then went to Boston,
and proceeded eastward as far as Dover. Not far from thence we met our friend
Thomas Gawthrop, from England, who was then on a visit to these provinces. From
Newport we sailed to Nantucket; were there nearly a week; and from thence came
over to Dartmouth. Having finished our visit in these parts, we crossed the
Sound from New London to Long Island, and taking some meetings on the island
proceeded towards home, which we reached the 13th of seventh month, 1747, having
rode about fifteen hundred miles, and sailed about one hundred and fifty.
In
this journey, I may say in general, we were sometimes in much weakness, and
labored under discouragements, and at other times, through the renewed
manifestations of Divine love, we had seasons of refreshment wherein the power
of truth prevailed. We were taught by renewed experience to labor for an inward
stillness; at no time to seek for words, but to live in the spirit of truth,
and utter that to the people which truth opened in us. My beloved companion and
I belonged both to one meeting, came forth in the ministry near the same time,
and were inwardly united in the work. He was about thirteen years older than I,
bore the heaviest burden, and was an instrument of the greatest use.
Finding
a concern to visit Friends in the lower counties of Delaware, and on the
eastern shore of Maryland, and having an opportunity to join with my
well-beloved ancient friend, John Sykes, we obtained certificates, and set off
the 7th of eighth month, 1748, were at the meetings of Friends in the lower
counties, attended the Yearly Meeting at Little Creek, and made a visit to most
of the meetings on the eastern shore, and so home by the way of Nottingham. We
were abroad about six weeks, and rode, by computation, about five hundred and
fifty miles.
Our
exercise at times was heavy, but through the goodness of the Lord we were often
refreshed, and I may say by experience "he is a stronghold in the day of
trouble." Though our Society in these parts appeared to me to be in a
declining condition, yet I believe the Lord hath a people amongst them who
labor to serve him uprightly, but they have many difficulties to encounter.
Chapter III: 1749-1756
His Marriage - The Death of his Father - His Journeys into the upper
part of New Jersey, and afterwards into Pennsylvania - Considerations on
keeping Slaves, and Visits to the Families of Friends at several times and
places - An Epistle from the General Meeting - His journey to Long Island -
Considerations on Trading and on the Use of Spirituous Liquors and Costly
Apparel - Letter to a Friend.
About
this time, believing it good for me to settle, and thinking seriously about a
companion, my heart was turned to the Lord with desires that he would give me
wisdom to proceed therein agreeably to his will, and he was pleased to give me
a well-inclined damsel, Sarah Ellis, to whom I was married the 18th of eighth
month, 1749.
In
the fall of the year 1750 died my father, Samuel Woolman, of a fever, aged
about sixty years. In his lifetime he manifested much care for us his children,
that in our youth we might learn to fear the Lord; and often endeavored to
imprint in our minds the true principles of virtue, and particularly to cherish
in us a spirit of tenderness, not only towards poor people, but also towards
all creatures of which we had the command.
After
my return from Carolina in 1746, I made some observations on keeping slaves,
which some time before his decease I showed to him; he perused the manuscript,
proposed a few alterations, and appeared well satisfied that I found a concern
on that account. In his last sickness, as I was watching with him one night, he
being so far spent that there was no expectation of his recovery, though he had
the perfect use of his understanding, he asked me concerning the manuscript,
and whether I expected soon to proceed to take the advice of friends in
publishing it? After some further conversation thereon, he said, "I have
all along been deeply affected with the oppression of the poor negroes; and
now, at last, my concern for them is as great as ever."
By
his direction I had written his will in a time of health, and that night he
desired me to read it to him, which I did; and he said it was agreeable to his
mind. He then made mention of his end, which he believed was near; and
signified that though he was sensible of many imperfections in the course of
his life, yet his experience of the power of truth, and of the love and
goodness of God from time to time, even till now, was such that he had no doubt
that on leaving this life he should enter into one more happy.
The
next day his sister Elizabeth came to see him, and told him of the decease of
their sister Anne, who died a few days before; he then said, "I reckon
Sister Anne was free to leave this world?" Elizabeth said she was. He then
said, "I also am free to leave it"; and being in great weakness of
body said, "I hope I shall shortly go to rest." He continued in a
weighty frame of mind, and was sensible till near the last.
Second
of ninth month, 1751. - Feeling drawings in my mind to visit Friends at the
Great Meadows, in the upper part of West Jersey, with the unity of our Monthly
Meeting, I went there, and had some searching laborious exercise amongst
Friends in those parts, and found inward peace therein.
Ninth
month, 1753. - In company with my well-esteemed friend, John Sykes, and with
the unity of Friends, I travelled about two weeks, visiting Friends in Buck's
County. We labored in the love of the gospel, according to the measure
received; and through the mercies of Him who is strength to the poor who trust
in him, we found satisfaction in our visit. In the next winter, way opening to
visit Friends' families within the compass of our Monthly Meeting, partly by
the labors of two Friends from Pennsylvania, I joined in some part of the work,
having had a desire some time that it might go forward amongst us.
About
this time, a person at some distance lying sick, his brother came to me to
write his will. I knew he had slaves, and, asking his brother, was told he
intended to leave them as slaves to his children. As writing is a profitable
employ, and as offending sober people was disagreeable to my inclination, I was
straitened in my mind; but as I looked to the Lord, he inclined my heart to his
testimony. I told the man that I believed the practice of continuing slavery to
this people was not right, and that I had a scruple in my mind against doing
writings of that kind; that though many in our Society kept them as slaves,
still I was not easy to be concerned in it, and desired to be excused from
going to write the will. I speak to him in the fear of the Lord, and he made no
reply to what I said, but went away; he also had some concerns in the practice,
and I thought he was displeased with me. In this case I had fresh confirmation
that acting contrary to present outward interest, from a motive of Divine love
and in regard to truth and righteousness, and thereby incurring the resentments
of people, opens the way to a treasure better than silver, and to a friendship
exceeding the friendship of men.
The
manuscript before mentioned having laid by me several years, the publication of
it rested weightily upon me, and this year I offered it to the revisal of my
friends, who, having examined and made some small alterations in it, directed a
number of copies thereof to be published and dispersed amongst members of our
Society.2
[Footnote
2: This pamphlet was published by Benjamin Franklin, 1754.]
In
the year 1754 I found my mind drawn to join in a visit to Friends' families
belonging to Chesterfield Monthly Meeting, and having the approbation of our
own, I went to their Monthly meeting in order to confer with Friends, and see
if way opened for it. I had conference with some of their members, the proposal
having been opened before in their meeting, and one Friend agreed to join with
me as a companion for a beginning; but when meeting was ended, I felt great
distress of mind, and doubted what way to take, or whether to go home and wait
for greater clearness. I kept my distress secret, and going with a friend to
his house, my desires were to the great Shepherd for his heavenly instruction.
In the morning I felt easy to proceed on the visit, though very low in my mind.
As mine eye was turned to the Lord, waiting in families in deep reverence
before him, he was pleased graciously to afford help, so that we had many
comfortable opportunities, and it appeared as a fresh visitation to some young
people. I spent several weeks this winter in the service, part of which time
was employed near home. And again in the following winter I was several weeks
in the same service; some part of the time at Shrewsbury, in company with my
beloved friend, John Sykes; and I have cause humbly to acknowledge that through
the goodness of the Lord our hearts were at times enlarged in his love, and
strength was given to go through the trials which, in the course of our visit,
attended us.
From
a disagreement between the powers of England and France, it was now a time of
trouble on this continent, and an epistle to Friends went forth from our
general spring meeting, which I thought good to give a place in this Journal.
An
Epistle from our general Spring Meeting of ministers and elders for
Pennsylvania and New Jersey, held at Philadelphia, from the 29th of the third
month to the 1st of the fourth month, inclusive, 1755.
To
Friends on the Continent of America:
Dear
Friends, - In an humble sense of Divine goodness, and the gracious continuation
of God's love to his people, we tenderly salute you, and are at this time
therein engaged in mind, that all of us who profess the truth, as held forth
and published by our worthy predecessors in this latter age of the world, may
keep near to that Life which is the light of men, and be strengthened to hold
fast the profession of our faith without wavering, that our trust may not be in
man, but in the Lord alone, who ruleth in the army of heaven and in the
kingdoms of men, before whom the earth is "as the dust of the balance, and
her inhabitants as grasshoppers." (Isa. xl. 22.)
Being
convinced that the gracious design of the Almighty in sending his Son into the
world was to repair the breach made by disobedience, to finish sin and
transgression, that his kingdom might come, and his will be done on earth as it
is in heaven, we have found it to be our duty to cease from those national
contests which are productive of misery and bloodshed, and submit our cause to
him, the Most High, whose tender love to his children exceeds the most warm
affections of natural parents, and who hath promised to his seed throughout the
earth, as to one individual, "I will never leave thee, nor forsake
thee." (Heb. xiii. 5.) And we, through the gracious dealings of the Lord
our God, have had experience of that work which is carried on, not by earthly
might, "nor by power, but by my Spirit, saith the Lord of Hosts."
(Zech. iv. 6.) By which operation that spiritual kingdom is set up, which is to
subdue and break in pieces all kingdoms that oppose it, and shall stand forever.
In a deep sense thereof, and of the safety, stability, and peace that are in
it, we are desirous that all who profess the truth may be inwardly acquainted
with it, and thereby be qualified to conduct ourselves in all parts of our life
as becomes our peaceable profession; and we trust as there is a faithful
continuance to depend wholly upon the almighty arm, from one generation to
another, the peaceable kingdom will gradually be extended "from sea to
sea, and from the river to the ends of the earth" (Zech. ix. 10), to the
completion of those prophecies already begun, that "nation shall not lift
up a sword against nation, nor learn war any more." (Isa. ii. 4. Micah iv.
3.)
And,
dearly beloved friends, seeing that we have these promises, and believe that
God is beginning to fulfil them, let us constantly endeavor to have our minds
sufficiently disentangled from the surfeiting cares of this life, and redeemed
from the love of the world, that no earthly possessions nor enjoyments may bias
our judgments, or turn us from that resignation and entire trust in God to
which his blessing is most surely annexed; then may we say, "Our Redeemer
is mighty, he will plead our cause for us." (Jer. I. 34.) And if, for the
further promoting of his most gracious purposes in the earth, he should give us
to taste of that bitter cup of which his faithful ones have often partaken, O
that we might be rightly prepared to receive it!
And
now, dear friends, with respect to the commotions and stirrings of the powers
of the earth at this time near us, we are desirous that none of us may be moved
thereat, but repose ourselves in the munition of that rock which all these
shakings shall not move, even in the knowledge and feeling of the eternal power
of God, keeping us subjectly given up to his heavenly will, and feeling it
daily to mortify that which remains in any of us which is of this world; for
the worldly part in any is the changeable part, and that is up and down, full
and empty, joyful and sorrowful, as things go well or ill in this world. For as
the truth is but one, and many are made partakers of its spirit, so the world
is but one, and many are made partakers of the spirit of it; and so many as do
partake of it, so many will be straitened and perplexed with it. But they who
are single to the truth, waiting daily to feel the life and virtue of it in
their hearts, shall rejoice in the midst of adversity, and have to experience
with the prophet, that, "although the fig-tree shall not blossom, neither
shall fruit be in the vines; the labor of the olive shall fail, and the fields
shall yield no meat; the flock shall be cut off from the fold, and there shall
be no herd in the stalls; yet will they rejoice in the Lord, and joy in the God
of their salvation." (Hab. iii. 17, 18.)
If,
contrary to this, we profess the truth, and, not living under the power and
influence of it, are producing fruits disagreeable to the purity thereof, and
trust to the strength of man to support ourselves, our confidence therein will
be vain. For he who removed the hedge from his vineyard, and gave it to be
trodden under foot by reason of the wild grapes it produced (Isa. v. 6),
remains unchangeable; and if, for the chastisement of wickedness and the
further promoting of his own glory, he doth arise, even to shake terribly the
earth, who then may oppose him, and prosper?
We
remain, in the love of the gospel, your friends and brethren.
(Signed
by fourteen Friends.)
Scrupling
to do writings relative to keeping slaves has been a means of sundry small
trials to me, in which I have so evidently felt my own will set aside that I
think it good to mention a few of them. Tradesmen and retailers of goods, who
depend on their business for a living, are naturally inclined to keep the
good-will of their customers; nor is it a pleasant thing for young men to be
under any necessity to question the judgment or honesty of elderly men, and
more especially of such as have a fair reputation. Deep-rooted customs, though
wrong, are not easily altered; but it is the duty of all to be firm in that which
they certainly know is right for them. A charitable, benevolent man, well
acquainted with a negro, may, I believe, under some circumstances, keep him in
his family as a servant, on no other motives than the negro's good; but man, as
man, knows not what shall be after him, nor hath he any assurance that his
children will attain to that perfection in wisdom and goodness necessary
rightly to exercise such power; hence it is clear to me, that I ought not to be
the scribe where wills are drawn in which some children are made ales masters
over others during life.
About
this time an ancient man of good esteem in the neighborhood came to my house to
get his will written. He had young negroes, and I asked him privately how he
purposed to dispose of them. He told me; I then said, "I cannot write thy
will without breaking my own peace," and respectfully gave him my reasons
for it. He signified that he had a choice that I should have written it, but as
I could not, consistently with my conscience, he did not desire it, and so he
got it written by some other person. A few years after, there being great
alterations in his family, he came again to get me to write his will. His
negroes were yet young, and his son, to whom he intended to give them, was,
since he first spoke to me, from a libertine become a sober young man, and he
supposed that I would have been free on that account to write it. We had much
friendly talk on the subject, and then deferred it. A few days after he came
again and directed their freedom, and I then wrote his will.
Near
the time that the last-mentioned Friend first spoke to me, a neighbor received
a bad bruise in his body and sent for me to bleed him, which having done, he
desired me to write his will. I took notes, and amongst other things he told me
to which of his children he gave his young negro. I considered the pain and
distress he was in, and knew not how it would end, so I wrote his will, save
only that part concerning his slave, and carrying it to his bedside read it to
him. I then told him in a friendly way that I could not write any instruments
by which my fellow-creatures were made slaves, without bringing trouble on my
own mind. I let him know that I charged nothing for what I had done, and
desired to be excused from doing the other part in the way he proposed. We then
had a serious conference on the subject; at length, he agreeing to set her
free, I finished his will.
Having
found drawings in my mind to visit Friends on Long Island, after obtaining a
certificate from our Monthly Meeting, I set off 12th of fifth month, 1756. When
I reached the island, I lodged the first night at the house of my dear friend,
Richard Hallett. The next day being the first of the week, I was at the meeting
in New Town, in which we experienced the renewed manifestations of the love of
Jesus Christ to the comfort of the honest hearted. I went that night to
Flushing, and the next day I and my beloved friend, Matthew Franklin, crossed
the ferry at White Stone; were at three meetings on the main, and then returned
to the island, where I spent the remainder of the week in visiting meetings.
The Lord, I believe, hath a people in those parts who are honestly inclined to
serve him; but many I fear, are too much clogged with the things of this life,
and do not come forward bearing the cross in such faithfulness as he calls for.
My
mind was deeply engaged in this visit, both in public and private, and at
several places where I was, on observing that they had slaves, I found myself
under a necessity, in a friendly way, to labor with them on that subject;
expressing, as way opened, the inconsistency of that practice with the purity
of the Christian religion, and the ill effects of it manifested amongst us.
The
latter end of the week their Yearly Meeting began; at which were our friends,
John Scarborough, Jane Hoskins, and Susannah Brown, from Pennsylvania. The
public meetings were large, and measurably favored with Divine goodness. The
exercise of my mind at this meeting was chiefly on account of those who were
considered as the foremost rank in the Society; and in a meeting of ministers
and elders way opened for me to express in some measure what lay upon me; and
when Friends were met for transacting the affairs of the church, having sat
awhile silent, I felt a weight on my mind, and stood up; and through the
gracious regard of our Heavenly Father, strength was given fully to clear
myself of a burden which for some days had been increasing upon me.
Through
the humbling dispensations of Divine Providence, men are sometimes fitted for
his service. The messages of the prophet Jeremiah were so disagreeable to the
people, and so adverse to the spirit they lived in, that he became the object
of their reproach, and in the weakness of nature he thought of desisting from
his prophetic office; but saith he, "His word was in my heart as a burning
fire shut up in my bones; and I was weary with forbearing, and could not
stay." I saw at this time that if I was honest in declaring that which
truth opened in me, I could not please all men; and I labored to be content in
the way of my duty, however disagreeable to my own inclination. After this I
went homeward, taking Woodbridge and Plainfield in my way, in both which
meetings the pure influence of Divine love was manifested, in an humbling sense
whereof I went home. I had been out about twenty-four days, and rode about
three hundred and sixteen miles.
While
I was out on this journey my heart was much affected with a sense of the state
of the churches in our southern provinces; and believing the Lord was calling
me to some further labor amongst them, I was bowed in reverence before him,
with fervent desires that I might find strength to resign myself to his
heavenly will.
Until
this year, 1756, I continued to retail goods, besides following my trade as a
tailor; about which time I grew uneasy on account of my business growing too
cumbersome. I had begun with selling trimmings for garments, and from thence
proceeded to sell cloths and linens; and at length, having got a considerable
shop of goods, my trade increased every year, and the way to large business
appeared open, but I felt a stop in my mind.
Through
the mercies of the Almighty, I had, in a good degree, learned to be content with
a plain way of living. I had but a small family; and, on serious consideration,
believed truth did not require me to engage much in cumbering affairs. It had
been my general practice to buy and sell things really useful. Things that
served chiefly to please the vain mind in people, I was not easy to trade in;
seldom did it; and whenever I did I found it weaken me as a Christian.
The
increase of business became my burden; for though my natural inclination was
toward merchandise, yet I believed truth required me to live more free from
outward cumbers; and there was now a strife in my mind between the two. In this
exercise my prayers were put up to the Lord, who graciously heard me, and gave
me a heart resigned to his holy will. Then I lessened my outward business, and,
as I had opportunity, told my customers of my intentions, that they might
consider what shop to turn to; and in a while I wholly laid down merchandise,
and followed my trade as a tailor by myself, having no apprentice. I also had a
nursery of apple-trees, in which I employed some of my time in hoeing,
grafting, trimming, and inoculating.2 In merchandise it is the
custom where I lived to sell chiefly on credit, and poor people often get in
debt; when payment is expected, not having wherewith to pay, their creditors
often sue for it at law. Having frequently observed occurrences of this kind, I
found it good for me to advise poor people to take such goods as were most
useful, and not costly.
[Footnote
2: He seems to have regarded agriculture as the business most conducive to
moral and physical health. He thought "if the leadings of the Spirit were
more attended to, more people would be engaged in the sweet employment of
husbandry, where labor is agreeable and healthful." He does not condemn
the honest acquisition of wealth in other business free from oppression; even
"merchandising," he thought, might be carried on innocently and in
pure reason. Christ does not forbid the laying up of a needful support for
family and friends; the command is, "Lay not up for yourselves treasures
on earth." From his little farm on the Rancocas he looked out with a
mingled feeling of wonder and sorrow upon the hurry and unrest of the world;
and especially was he pained to see luxury and extravagance overgrowing the early
plainness and simplicity of his own religious society. He regarded the merely
rich man with unfeigned pity. With nothing of his scorn, he had all of
Thoreau's commiseration, for people who went about bowed down with the weight
of broad acres and great houses on their backs. - Note in edition published by
Messrs. Houghton, Mifflin & Co.]
In
the time of trading I had an opportunity of seeing that the too liberal use of
spirituous liquors and the custom of wearing too costly apparel led some people
into great inconveniences; and that these two things appear to be often
connected with each other. By not attending to that use of things which is
consistent with universal righteousness, there is an increase of labor which
extends beyond what our Heavenly Father intends for us. And by great labor, and
often of much sweating, there is even among such as are not drunkards a craving
of liquors to revive the spirits; that partly by the luxurious drinking of
some, and partly by the drinking of others (led to it through immoderate
labor), very great quantities of rum are every year expended in our colonies;
the greater part of which we should have no need of, did we steadily attend to
pure wisdom.
When
men take pleasure in feeling their minds elevated with strong drink, and so
indulge their appetite as to disorder their understandings, neglect their duty
as members of a family or civil society, and cast off all regard to religion,
their case is much to be pitied. And where those whose lives are for the most
part regular, and whose examples have a strong influence on the minds of
others, adhere to some customs which powerfully draw to the use of more strong
liquor than pure wisdom allows, it hinders the spreading of the spirit of
meekness, and strengthens the hands of the more excessive drinkers. This is a
case to be lamented.
Every
degree of luxury hath some connection with evil; and if those who profess to be
disciples of Christ, and are looked upon as leaders of the people, have that
mind in them which was also in Christ, and so stand separate from every wrong
way, it is a means of help to the weaker. As I have sometimes been much spent
in the beat and have taken spirits to revive me, I have found by experience,
that in such circumstances the mind is not so calm, nor so fitly disposed for
Divine meditation, as when all such extremes are avoided. I have felt an
increasing care to attend to that Holy Spirit which sets right bounds to our
desires, and leads those who faithfully follow it to apply all the gifts of
Divine Providence to the purposes for which they were intended. Did those who
have the care of great estates attend with singleness of heart to this heavenly
Instructor, which so opens and enlarges the mind as to cause men to love their
neighbors as themselves, they would have wisdom given them to manage their
concerns, without employing some people in providing luxuries of life, or
others in laboring too hard; but for want of steadily regarding this principle
of Divine love, a selfish spirit takes place in the minds of people, which is
attended with darkness and manifold confusions in the world.
Though
trading in things useful is an honest employ, yet through the great number of
superfluities which are bought and sold, and through the corruption of the
times, they who apply to merchandise for a living have great need to be well
experienced in that precept which the Prophet Jeremiah laid down for his
scribe: "Seekest thou great things for thyself? seek them not."
In
the winter this year I was engaged with friends in visiting families, and
through the goodness of the Lord we oftentimes experienced his heart tendering
presence amongst us.
A
Copy of a Letter written to a Friend
"In
this, thy late affliction, I have found a deep fellow-feeling with thee, and
have had a secret hope throughout that it might please the Father of Mercies to
raise thee up and sanctify thy troubles to thee; that thou being more fully
acquainted with that way which the world esteems foolish, mayst feel the
clothing of Divine fortitude, and be strengthened to resist that spirit which
leads from the simplicity of the everlasting truth.
"We
may see ourselves crippled and halting, and from a strong bias to things
pleasant and easy find an impossibility to advance forward; but things
impossible with men are possible with God; and our wills being made subject to
his, all temptations are surmountable.
"This
work of subjecting the will is compared to the mineral in the furnace, which,
through fervent heat, is reduced from its first principle: 'He refines them as
silver is refined; he shall sit as a refiner and purifier of silver.' By these
comparisons we are instructed in the necessity of the melting operation of the
hand of God upon us, to prepare our hearts truly to adore him, and manifest
that adoration by inwardly turning away from that spirit, in all its workings,
which is not of him. To forward this work the all-wise God is sometimes
pleased, through outward distress, to bring us near the gates of death; that
life being painful and afflicting, and the prospect of eternity opened before
us, all earthly bonds may be loosened, and the mind prepared for that deep and
sacred instruction which otherwise would not be received. If kind parents love
their children and delight in their happiness, then he who is perfect goodness
in sending abroad mortal contagions doth assuredly direct their use. Are the
righteous removed by it? their change is happy. Are the wicked taken away in
their wickedness? the Almighty is clear. Do we pass through with anguish and
great bitterness, and yet recover? He intends that we should be purged from
dross, and our ear opened to discipline.
"And
now, as thou art again restored, after thy sore affliction and doubts of
recovery, forget not Him who hath helped thee, but in humble gratitude hold
fast his instructions, and thereby shun those by-paths which lead from the firm
foundation. I am sensible of that variety of company to which one in thy
business must be exposed; I have painfully felt the force of conversation
proceeding from men deeply rooted in an earthly mind, and can sympathize with
others in such conflicts, because much weakness still attends me.
"I
find that to be a fool as to worldly wisdom, and to commit my cause to God, not
fearing to offend men, who take offence at the simplicity of truth, is the only
way to remain unmoved at the sentiments of others.
"The
fear of man brings a snare. By halting in our duty, and giving back in the time
of trial, our hands grow weaker, our spirits get mingled with the people, our
ears grow dull as to hearing the language of the true Shepherd, so that when we
look at the way of the righteous, it seems as though it was not for us to
follow them.
"A
love clothes my mind while I write, which is superior to all expression; and I
find my heart open to encourage to a holy emulation, to advance forward in
Christian firmness. Deep humility is a strong bulwark, and as we enter into it
we find safety and true exaltation. The foolishness of God is wiser than man,
and the weakness of God is stronger than man. Being unclothed of our own
wisdom, and knowing the abasement of the creature, we find that power to arise
which gives health and vigor to us."
Chapter IV: 1757-1758
Visit to the Families of Friends at Burlington - Journey to
Pennsylvania, Maryland, Virginia, and North Carolina - Considerations on the
State of Friends there, and the Exercise he was under in Travelling among those
so generally concerned in keeping Slaves, with some Observations on this
Subject - Epistle to Friends at New Garden and Crane Creek - Thoughts on the
Neglect of a Religious Care in the Education of the Negroes.
Thirteenth
fifth month, 1757. - Being in good health, and abroad with Friends visiting
families, I lodged at a Friend's house in Burlington. Going to bed about the
time usual with me, I awoke in the night, and my meditations, as I lay, were on
the goodness and mercy of the Lord, in a sense whereof my heart was contrited.
After this I went to sleep again; in a short time I awoke; it was yet dark, and
no appearance of day or moonshine, and as I opened mine eyes I saw a light in
my chamber, at the apparent distance of five feet, about nine inches in
diameter, of a clear, easy brightness, and near its centre the most radiant. As
I lay still looking upon it without any surprise, words were spoken to my
inward ear, which filled my whole inward man. They were not the effect of
thought, nor any conclusion in relation to the appearance, but as the language
of the Holy One spoken in my mind. The words were, Certain Evidence of Divine
Truth. They were again repeated exactly in the same manner, and then the light
disappeared.
Feeling
the exercise in relation to a visit to the Southern Provinces to increase upon
me, I acquainted our Monthly Meeting therewith, and obtained their certificate.
Expecting to go alone, one of my brothers who lived in Philadelphia, having
some business in North Carolina, proposed going with me part of the way; but as
he had a view of some outward affairs, to accept of him as a companion was some
difficulty with me, whereupon I had conversation with him at sundry times. At
length feeling easy in my mind, I had conversation with several elderly Friends
of Philadelphia on the subject, and he obtaining a certificate suitable to the
occasion, we set off in the fifth month, 1757. Coming to Nottingham week-day
meeting, we lodged at John Churchman's, where I met with our friend, Benjamin
Buffington, from New England, who was returning from a visit to the Southern
Provinces. Thence we crossed the river Susquehanna, and lodged at William Cox's
in Maryland.
Soon
after I entered this province a deep and painful exercise came upon me, which I
often had some feeling of, since my mind was drawn toward these parts, and with
which I had acquainted my brother before we agreed to join as companions. As
the people in this and the Southern Provinces live much on the labor of slaves,
many of whom are used hardly, my concern was that I might attend with
singleness of heart to the voice of the true Shepherd and be so supported as to
remain unmoved at the faces of men.
As
it is common for Friends on such a visit to have entertainment free of cost, a
difficulty arose in my mind with respect to saving my money by kindness
received from what appeared to me to be the gain of oppression. Receiving a gift,
considered as a gift, brings the receiver under obligations to the benefactor,
and has a natural tendency to draw the obliged into a party with the giver. To
prevent difficulties of this kind, and to preserve the minds of judges from any
bias, was that Divine prohibition: "Thou shalt not receive any gift; for a
gift bindeth the wise, and perverteth the words of the righteous." (Exod.
xxiii. 8.) As the disciples were sent forth without any provision for their
journey, and our Lord said the workman is worthy of his meat, their labor in
the gospel was considered as a reward for their entertainment, and therefore
not received as a gift; yet, in regard to my present journey, I could not see
my way clear in that respect. The difference appeared thus: the entertainment
the disciples met with was from them whose hearts God had opened to receive
them, from a love to them and the truth they published; but we, considered as
members of the same religious society, look upon it as a piece of civility to
receive each other in such visits; and such receptions, at times, is partly in
regard to reputation, and not from an inward unity of heart and spirit. Conduct
is more convincing than language, and where people, by their actions, manifest
that the slave-trade is not so disagreeable to their principles but that it may
be encouraged, there is not a sound uniting with some Friends who visit them.
The
prospect of so weighty a work, and of being so distinguished from many whom I
esteemed before myself, brought me very low, and such were the conflicts of my
soul that I had a near sympathy with the Prophet, in the time of his weakness,
when he said: "If thou deal thus with me, kill me, I pray thee, if I have
found favor in thy sight." (Num. xi. 15.) But I soon saw that this proceeded
from the want of a full resignation to the Divine will. Many were the
afflictions which attended me, and in great abasement, with many tears, my
cries were to the Almighty for his gracious and fatherly assistance, and after
a time of deep trial I was favored to understand the state mentioned by the
Psalmist more clearly than ever I had done before; to wit: "My soul is
even as a weaned child." (Psalm cxxxi. 2.) Being thus helped to sink down
into resignation, I felt a deliverance from that tempest in which I had been
sorely exercised, and in calmness of mind went forward, trusting that the Lord
Jesus Christ, as I faithfully attended to him, would be a counsellor to me in
all difficulties, and that by His strength I should be enabled even to leave
money with the members of society where I had entertainment, when I found that
omitting it would obstruct that work to which I believed He had called me. As I
copy this after my return, I may here add, that oftentimes I did so under a
sense of duty. The way in which I did it was thus: when I expected soon to
leave a Friend's house where I had entertainment, if I believed that I should
not keep clear from the gain of oppression without leaving money, I spoke to
one of the heads of the family privately, and desired them to accept of those
pieces of silver, and give them to such of their negroes as they believed would
make the best use of them; and at other times I gave them to the negroes
myself, as the way looked clearest to me. Before I came out, I had provided a large
number of small pieces for this purpose and thus offering them to some whom
appeared to be wealthy people was a trial both to me and them. But the fear of
the Lord so covered me at times that my way was made easier than I expected;
and few, if any, manifested any resentment at the offer, and most of them,
after some conversation, accepted of them.
Ninth
of fifth month. - A Friend at whose house we breakfasted setting us a little on
our way, I had conversation with him, in the fear of the Lord, concerning his
slaves, in which my heart was tender; I used much plainness of speech with him,
and he appeared to take it kindly. We pursued our journey without appointing
meetings, being pressed in my mind to be at the Yearly Meeting in Virginia. In
my travelling on the road, I often felt a cry rise from the centre of my mind,
thus: "O Lord, I am a stranger on the earth, hide not thy face from
me." On the 11th, we crossed the rivers Patowmack and Rapahannock, and
lodged at Port Royal. On the way we had the company of a colonel of the
militia, who appeared to be a thoughtful man. I took occasion to remark on the
difference in general betwixt a people used to labor moderately for their
living, training up their children in frugality and business, and those who
live on the labor of slaves; the former, in my view, being the most happy life.
He concurred in the remark, and mentioned the trouble arising from the
untoward, slothful disposition of the negroes, adding that one of our laborers
would do as much in a day as two of their slaves. I replied, that free men,
whose minds were properly on their business, found a satisfaction in improving,
cultivating, and providing for their families; but negroes, laboring to support
others who claim them as their property, and expecting nothing but slavery
during life, had not the like inducement to be industrious.
After
some further conversation I said, that men having power too often misapplied
it; that though we made slaves of the negroes, and the Turks made slaves of the
Christians, I believed that liberty was the natural right of all men equally.
This he did not deny, but said the lives of the negroes were so wretched in
their own country that many of them lived better here than there. I replied,
"There is great odds in regard to us on what principle we act"; and
so the conversation on that subject ended. I may here add that another person,
some time afterwards, mentioned the wretchedness of the negroes, occasioned by
their intestine wars, as an argument in favor of our fetching them away for
slaves. To which I replied, if compassion for the Africans, on account of their
domestic troubles, was the real motive of our purchasing them, that spirit of
tenderness being attended to, would incite us to use them kindly that, as
strangers brought out of affliction, their lives might be happy among us. And
as they are human creatures, whose souls are as precious as ours, and who may
receive the same help and comfort from the Holy Scriptures as we do, we could
not omit suitable endeavors to instruct them therein; but that while we
manifest by our conduct that our views in purchasing them are to advance
ourselves, and while our buying captives taken in war animates those parties to
push on the war, and increase desolation amongst them, to say they live
unhappily in Africa is far from being an argument in our favor. I further said,
the present circumstances of these provinces to me appear difficult; the slaves
look like a burdensome stone to such as burden themselves with them; and that
if the white people retain a resolution to prefer their outward prospects of
gain to all other considerations, and do not act conscientiously toward them as
fellow-creatures, I believe that burden will grow heavier and heavier, until
times change in a way disagreeable to us. The person appeared very serious, and
owned that in considering their condition and the manner of their treatment in
these provinces he had sometimes thought it might be just in the Almighty so to
order it.
Having
travelled through Maryland, we came amongst Friends at Cedar Creek in Virginia,
on the 12th; and the next day rode, in company with several of them, a day's
journey to Camp Creek. As I was riding along in the morning, my mind was deeply
affected in a sense I had of the need of Divine aid to support me in the
various difficulties which attended me, and in uncommon distress of mind I
cried in secret to the Most High, "O Lord be merciful, I beseech thee, to
thy poor afflicted creature!" After some time, I felt inward relief, and,
soon after, a Friend in company began to talk in support of the slave-trade,
and said the negroes were understood to be the offspring of Cain, their
blackness being the mark which God set upon him after he murdered Abel his
brother; that it was the design of Providence they should be slaves, as a
condition proper to the race of so wicked a man as Cain was. Then another spake
in support of what had been said. To all which I replied in substance as
follows: that Noah and his family were all who survived the flood, according to
Scripture; and as Noah was of Seth's race, the family of Cain was wholly
destroyed. One of them said that after the flood Ham went to the land of Nod
and took a wife; that Nod was a land far distant, inhabited by Cain's race, and
that the flood did not reach it; and as Ham was sentenced to be a servant of
servants to his brethren, these two families, being thus joined, were
undoubtedly fit only for slaves. I replied, the flood was a judgment upon the
world for their abominations, and it was granted that Cain's stock was the most
wicked, and therefore unreasonable to suppose that they were spared. As to
Ham's going to the land of Nod for a wife, no time being fixed, Nod might be
inhabited by some of Noah's family before Ham married a second time; moreover
the text saith "That all flesh died that moved upon the earth." (Gen.
vii. 21.) I further remained them how the prophets repeatedly declare
"that the son shall not suffer for the iniquity of the father, but every
one be answerable for his own sins." I was troubled to perceive the
darkness of their imaginations, and in some pressure of spirit said, "The
love of ease and gain are the motives in general of keeping slaves, and men are
wont to take hold of weak arguments to support a cause which is unreasonable. I
have no interest on either side, save only the interest which I desire to have
in the truth. I believe liberty is their right, and as I see they are not only
deprived of it, but treated in other respects with inhumanity in many places, I
believe He who is a refuge for the oppressed will, in his own time, plead their
cause, and happy will it be for such as walk in uprightness before him."
And thus our conversation ended.
Fourteenth
of fifth month. - I was this day at Camp Creek Monthly Meeting, and then rode
to the mountains up James River, and had a meeting at a Friend's house, in both
which I felt sorrow of heart, and my tears were poured out before the Lord, who
was pleased to afford a degree of strength by which way was opened to clear my
mind amongst Friends in those places. From thence I went to Fork Creek, and so
to Cedar Creek again, at which place I now had a meeting. Here I found a tender
seed, and as I was preserved in the ministry to keep low with the truth, the
same truth in their hearts answered it, that it was a time of mutual
refreshment from the presence of the Lord. I lodged at James Standley's, father
of William Standley, one of the young men who suffered imprisonment at
Winchester last summer on account of their testimony against fighting, and I
had some satisfactory conversation with him concerning it. Hence I went to the
Swamp Meeting, and to Wayanoke Meeting, and then crossed James River, and
lodged near Burleigh. From the time of my entering Maryland I have been much
under sorrow, which of late so increased upon me that my mind was almost
overwhelmed, and I may say with the Psalmist, "In my distress I called
upon the Lord, and cried to my God," who, in infinite goodness, looked
upon my affliction, and in my private retirement sent the Comforter for my
relief, for which I humbly bless His holy name.
The
sense I had of the state of the churches brought a weight of distress upon me.
The gold to me appeared dim, and the fine gold changed, and though this is the
case too generally, yet the sense of it in these parts hath in a particular
manner borne heavy upon me. It appeared to me that through the prevailing of
the spirit of this world the minds of many were brought to an inward
desolation, and instead of the spirit of meekness, gentleness, and heavenly
wisdom, which are the necessary companions of the true sheep of Christ, a
spirit of fierceness and the love of dominion too generally prevailed. From
small beginnings in error great buildings by degrees are raised, and from one
age to another are more and more strengthened by the general concurrence of the
people; and as men obtain reputation by their profession of the truth, their
virtues are mentioned as arguments in favor of general error; and those of less
note, to justify themselves, say, such and such good men did the like. By what
other steps could the people of Judah arise to that height in wickedness as to
give just ground for the Prophet Isaiah to declare, in the name of the Lord,
"that none calleth for justice, nor any pleadeth for truth" (Isa.
lix. 4), or for the Almighty to call upon the great city of Jerusalem just
before the Babylonish captivity, "If ye can find a man, if there be any
who executeth judgment, that seeketh the truth, and I will pardon it?"
(Jer. v. 1.)
The
prospect of a way being open to the same degeneracy, in some parts of this
newly settled land of America, in respect to our conduct towards the negroes,
hath deeply bowed my mind in this journey, and though briefly to relate how
these people are treated is no agreeable work yet, after often reading over the
notes I made as I travelled, I find my mind engaged to prese ve them. Many of
the white people in those provinces take little or no care of negro marriages;
and when negroes marry after their own way, some make so little account of
those marriages that with views of outward interest they often part men from
their wives by selling them, far asunder, which is common when estates are sold
by executors at vendue. Many whose labor is heavy being followed at their business
in the field by a man with a whip, hired for that purpose, have in common
little else allowed but one peck of Indian corn and some salt, for one week,
with a few potatoes; the potatoes they commonly raise by their labor on the
first day of the week. The correction ensuing on their disobedience to
overseers, or slothfulness in business, is often very severe, and sometimes
desperate.
Men
and women have many times scarcely clothes sufficient to hide their nakedness,
and boys and girls ten and twelve years old are often quite naked amongst their
master's children. Some of our Society, and some of the society called
Newlights, use some endeavors to instruct those they have in reading; but in
common this is not only neglected, but disapproved. These are the people by
whose labor the other inhabitants are in a great measure supported, and many of
them in the luxuries of life. These are the people who have made no agreement
to serve us, and who have not forfeited their liberty that we know of. These
are the souls for whom Christ died, and for our conduct towards them we must
answer before Him who is no respecter of persons. They who know the only true
God, and Jesus Christ whom he hath sent, and are thus acquainted with the
merciful, benevolent, gospel spirit, will therein perceive that the indignation
of God is kindled against oppression and cruelty, and in beholding the great
distress of so numerous a people will find cause for mourning.
From
my lodgings I went to Burleigh Meeting, where I felt my mind drawn in a quiet,
resigned state. After a long silence I felt an engagement to stand up, and
through the powerful operation of Divine love we were favored with an edifying
meeting. The next meeting we had was at Black-Water, and from thence went to
the Yearly Meeting at the Western Branch. When business began, some queries
were introduced by some of their members for consideration, and, if approved,
they were to be answered hereafter by their respective Monthly Meetings. They
were the Pennsylvania queries, which had been examined by a committee of
Virginia Yearly Meeting appointed the last year, who made some alterations in
them, one of which alterations was made in favor of a custom which troubled me.
The query was, "Are there any concerned in the importation of negroes, or
in buying them after imported?" which was thus altered, "Are there
any concerned in the importation of negroes, or buying them to trade in?"
As one query admitted with unanimity was, "Are any concerned in buying or
vending goods unlawfully imported, or prize goods?" I found my mind
engaged to say that as we profess the truth, and were there assembled to
support the testimony of it, it was necessary for us to dwell deep and act in
that wisdom which is pure, or otherwise we could not prosper. I then mentioned
their alteration, and referring to the last-mentioned query, added, that as
purchasing any merchandise taken by the sword was always allowed to be
inconsistent with our principles, so negroes being captives of war, or taken by
stealth, it was inconsistent with our testimony to buy them; and their being
our fellow-creatures, and sold as slaves, added greatly to the iniquity.
Friends appeared attentive to what was said; some expressed a care and concern
about their negroes; none made any objection, by way of reply to what I said,
but the query was admitted as they had altered it.
As
some of their members have heretofore traded in negroes, as in other
merchandise, this query being admitted will be one step further than they have
hitherto gone, and I did not see it my duty to press for an alteration, but
felt easy to leave it all to Him who alone is able to turn the hearts of the
mighty, and make way for the spreading of truth on the earth, by means
agreeable to his infinite wisdom. In regard to those they already had, I felt
my mind engaged to labor with them, and said that as we believe the Scriptures
were given forth by holy men, as they were moved by the Holy Ghost, and many of
us know by experience that they are often helpful and comfortable, and believe
ourselves bound in duty to teach our children to read them; I believed that if
we were divested of all selfish views, the same good spirit that gave them
forth would engage us to teach the negroes to read, that they might have the
benefit of them. Some present manifested a concern to take more care in the
education of their negroes.
Twenty-ninth
fifth month. - At the house where I lodged was a meeting of ministers and
elders. I found an engagement to speak freely and plainly to them concerning
their slaves; mentioning how they as the first rank in the society, whose
conduct in that case was much noticed by others, were under the stronger
obligations to look carefully to themselves. Expressing how needful it was for
them in that situation to be thoroughly divested of all selfish views; that,
living in the pure truth, and acting conscientiously towards those people in
their education and otherwise, they might be instrumental in helping forward a
work so exceedingly necessary, and so much neglected amongst them. At the
twelfth hour the meeting of worship began, which was a solid meeting.
The
next day, about the tenth hour, Friends met to finish their business, and then
the meeting for worship ensued, which to me was a laborious time; but through
the goodness of the Lord, truth, I believed, gained some ground, and it was
strengthening opportunity to the honest-hearted.
About
this time I wrote an epistle to Friends in the back settlements of North
Carolina, as follows:
To
Friends at their Monthly Meeting at New Garden and Cane Creek, in North
Carolina:
Dear
Friends, - It having pleased the Lord to draw me forth on a visit to some parts
of Virginia and Carolina, you have often been in my mind; and though my way is
not clear to come in person to visit you, yet I feel it in my heart to
communicate a few things, as they arise in the love of truth. First, my dear
friends, dwell in humility; and take heed that no views of outward gain get too
deep hold of you, that so your eyes being single to the Lord, you may be preserved
in the way of safety. Where people let loose their minds after the love of
outward things, and are more engaged in pursuing the profits and seeking the
friendships of this world than to be inwardly acquainted with the way of true
peace, they walk in a vain shadow, while the true comfort of life is wanting.
Their examples are often hurtful to others; and their treasures thus collected
do many times prove dangerous snares to their children.
But
where people are sincerely devoted to follow Christ, and dwell under the
influence of his Holy Spirit, their stability and firmness, through a Divine
blessing, is at times like dew on the tender plants round about them, and the
weightiness of their spirits secretly works on the minds of others. In this
condition, through the spreading influence of Divine love, they feel a care
over the flock, and way is opened for maintaining good order in the Society.
And though we may meet with opposition from another spirit, yet, as there is a
dwelling in meekness, feeling our spirits subject, and moving only in the
gentle, peaceable wisdom, the inward reward of quietness will be greater than
all our difficulties. Where the pure life is kept to, and meetings of
discipline are held in the authority of it, we find by experience that they are
comfortable, and tend to the health of the body.
While
I write, the youth come fresh in my way. Dear young people, choose God for your
portion; love his truth, and be not ashamed of it; choose for your company such
as serve him in uprightness; and shun as most dangerous the conversation of
those whose lives are of an ill savor; for by frequenting such company some
hopeful young people have come to great loss, and been drawn from less evils to
greater, to their utter ruin. In the bloom of youth no ornament is so lovely as
that of virtue, nor any enjoyments equal to those which we partake of in fully
resigning ourselves to the Divine will. These enjoyments add sweetness to all
other comforts, and give true satisfaction in company and conversation, where
people are mutually acquainted with it; and as your minds are thus seasoned
with the truth, you will find strength to abide steadfast to the testimony of
it, and be prepared for services in the church.
And
now, dear friends and brethren, as you are improving a wilderness, and may be
numbered amongst the first planters in one part of a province, I beseech you,
in the love of Jesus Christ, wisely to consider the force of your examples, and
think how much your successors may be thereby affected. It is a help in a
country, yea, and a great favor and blessing, when customs first settled are
agreeable to sound wisdom; but when they are otherwise the effect of them is
grievous; and children feel themselves encompassed with difficulties prepared
for them by their predecessors.
As
moderate care and exercise, under the direction of true wisdom, are useful both
to mind and body, so by these means in general the real wants of life are
easily supplied, our gracious Father having so proportioned one to the other
that keeping in the medium we may pass on quietly. Where slaves are purchased
to do our labor numerous difficulties attend it. To rational creatures bondage
is uneasy, and frequently occasions sourness and discontent in them; which
affects the family and such as claim the mastery over them. Thus people and
their children are many times encompassed with vexations, which arise from
their applying to wrong methods to get a living.
I
have been informed that there is a large number of Friends in your parts who
have no slaves; and in tender and most affectionate love I beseech you to keep
clear from purchasing any. Look, my dear friends, to Divine Providence, and
follow in simplicity that exercise of body, that plainness and frugality, which
true wisdom leads to; so may you be preserved from those dangers which attend
such as are aiming at outward ease and greatness.
Treasures,
though small, attained on a true principle of virtue, are sweet; and while we
walk in the light of the Lord there is true comfort and satisfaction in the
possession; neither the murmurs of an oppressed people, nor a throbbing, uneasy
conscience, nor anxious thoughts about the events of things, hinder the
enjoyment of them.
When
we look towards the end of life, and think on the division of our substance
among our successors, if we know that it was collected in the fear of the Lord,
in honesty, in equity, and in uprightness of heart before him, we may consider
it as his gift to us, and with a single eye to his blessing, bestow it on those
we leave behind us. Such is the happiness of the plain ways of true virtue.
"The work of righteousness shall be peace; and the effect of
righteousness, quietness and assurance forever." (Isa. xxxii. 17.)
Dwell
here, my dear friends; and then in remote and solitary deserts you may find
true peace and satisfaction. If the Lord be our God, in truth and reality,
there is safety for us: for he is a stronghold in the day of trouble, and
knoweth them that trust in him.
Isle
of Wight County, in Virginia, 20th of the 5th month, 1757.
From
the Yearly Meeting in Virginia I went to Carolina, and on the first of sixth
month was at Wells Monthly Meeting, where the spring of the gospel ministry was
opened, and the love of Jesus Christ experienced among us; to his name be the
praise.
Here
my brother joined with some Friends from New Garden who were going homeward;
and I went next to Simons Creek Monthly Meeting, where I was silent during the
meeting for worship. When business came on, my mind was exercised concerning
the poor slaves, but I did not feel my way clear to speak. In this condition I
was bowed in spirit before the Lord, and with tears and inward supplication
besought him so to open my understanding that I might know his will concerning
me; and, at length, my mind was settled in silence. Near the end of their
business a member of their meeting expressed a concern that had some time lain
upon him, on account of Friends so much neglecting their duty in the education
of their slaves, and proposed having meetings sometimes appointed for them on a
weekday, to be attended only by some Friends to be named in their Monthly
Meetings. Many present appeared to unite with the proposal. One said he had
often wondered that they, being our fellow-creatures, and capable of religious
understanding, had been so exceedingly neglected; another expressed the like
concern, and appeared zealous that in future it might be more closely
considered. At length a minute was made, and the further consideration of it
referred to their next Monthly Meeting. The Friend who made this proposal hath
negroes; he told me that he was at New Garden, about two hundred and fifty
miles from home, and came back alone; that in this solitary journey this
exercise, in regard to the education of their negroes, was from time to time
renewed in his mind. A Friend of some note in Virginia, who hath slaves, told
me that he being far from home on a lonesome journey had many serious thoughts
about them; and his mind was so impressed therewith that he believed he saw a
time coming when Divine Providence would alter the circumstance of these
people, respecting their condition as slaves.
From
hence I went to a meeting at Newbegun Creek, and sat a considerable time in
much weakness; then I felt truth open the way to speak a little in much
plainness and simplicity, till at length, through the increase of Divine love
amongst us, we had a seasoning opportunity. This was also the case at the head
of Little River, where we had a crowded meeting on a first-day. I went thence
to the Old Neck, where I was led into a careful searching out of the secret
workings of the mystery of iniquity, which, under a cover of religion exalts
itself against that pure spirit which leads in the way of meekness and
self-denial. Pineywoods was the last meeting I was at in Carolina; it was
large, and my heart being deeply engaged, I was drawn forth into a fervent
labor amongst them.
When
I was at Newbegun Creek a Friend was there who labored for his living, having
no negroes, and who had been a minister many years. He came to me the next day,
and as we rode together, he signified that he wanted to talk with me concerning
a difficulty he had been under, which he related nearly as follows: That as
moneys had of late years been raised by a tax to carry on the wars, he had a
scruple in his mind in regard to paying it, and chose rather to suffer
restraint of his goods; but as he was the only person who refused it in those
parts, and knew not that any one else was in the like circumstances, he
signified that it had been a heavy trial to him, especially as some of his
brethren had been uneasy with his conduct in that case. He added, that from a
sympathy he felt with me yesterday in meeting, he found freedom thus to open
the matter in the way of querying concerning Friends in our parts; I told him
the state of Friends amongst us as well as I was able, and also that I had for
some time been under the like scruple. I believed him to be one who was
concerned to walk uprightly before the Lord, and esteemed it my duty to
preserve this note concerning him, Samuel Newby.
From
hence I went back into Virginia, and had a meeting near James Cowpland's; it
was a time of inward suffering, but through the goodness of the Lord I was made
content; at another meeting, through the renewings of pure love, we had a very
comfortable season.
Travelling
up and down of late, I have had renewed evidences that to be faithful to the
Lord, and content with his will concerning me, is a most necessary and useful
lesson for me to be learning; looking less at the effects of my labor than at
the pure motion and reality of the concern, as it arises from heavenly love. In
the Lord Jehovah is everlasting strength; and as the mind, by humble
resignation, is united to Him, and we utter words from an inward knowledge that
they arise from the heavenly spring, though our way may be difficult, and it
may require close attention to keep in it, and though the matter in which we
may be led may tend to our own abasement; yet, if we continue in patience and
meekness, heavenly peace will be the reward of our labors.
I
attended Curles Meeting, which, though small, was reviving to the
honest-hearted. Afterwards I went to Black Creek and Caroline Meetings, from
whence, accompanied by William Standley before mentioned, I rode to Goose Creek,
being much through the woods, and about one hundred miles. We lodged the first
night at a public-house; the second in the woods; and the next day we reached a
Friend's house at Goose Creek. In the woods we were under some disadvantage,
having no fire-works nor bells for our horses, but we stopped a little before
night and let them feed on the wild grass, which was plentiful, in the mean
time cutting with our knives a store against night. We then secured our horses,
and gathering some bushes under an oak we lay down; but the mosquitoes being
numerous and the ground damp I slept but little. Thus lying in the wilderness,
and looking at the stars, I was led to contemplate on the condition of our
first parents when they were sent forth from the garden; how the Almighty,
though they had been disobedient, continued to be a father to them, and showed
them what tended to their felicity as intelligent creatures, and was acceptable
to him. To provide things relative to our outward living, in the way of true
wisdom, is good, and the gift of improving in things useful is a good gift, and
comes from the Father of Lights. Many have had this gift; and from age to age
there have been improvements of this kind made in the world. But some, not
keeping to the pure gift, have in the creaturely cunning and self-exaltation
sought out many inventions. As the first motive to these inventions of men, as
distinct from that uprightness in which man was created, was evil, so the
effects have been and are evil. It is, therefore, as necessary for us at this
day constantly to attend on the heavenly gift, to be qualified to use rightly
the good things in this life, amidst great improvements, as it was for our
first parents when they were without any improvements, without any friend or father
but God only.
I
was at a meeting at Goose Creek, and next at a Monthly Meeting at Fairfax,
where, through the gracious dealing of the Almighty with us, his power
prevailed over many hearts. From thence I went to Monoquacy and Pipe Creek in
Maryland; at both places I had cause humbly to adore Him who had supported me
through many exercises, and by whose help I was enabled to reach the true
witness in the hearts of others. There were some hopeful young people in those
parts. I had meetings afterwards at John Everit's, in Monalen, and at
Huntingdon, and I was made humbly thankful to the Lord, who opened my heart
amongst the people in these new settlements, so that it was a time of
encouragement to the honest-minded.
At
Monalen a Friend gave me some account of a religious society among the Dutch
called Mennonists, and amongst other things related a passage in substance as
follows: One of the Mennonists having acquaintance with a man of another
society at a considerable distance, and being with his wagon on business near
the house of his said acquaintance, and night coming on, he had thoughts of
putting up with him, but passing by his fields, and observing the distressed
appearance of his slaves, he kindled a fire in the woods hard by, and lay there
that night. His said acquaintance hearing where he lodged, and afterward
meeting the Mennonist, told him of it, adding he should have been heartily
welcome at his house, and from their acquaintance in former time wondered at his
conduct in that case. The Mennonist replied, "Ever since I lodged by thy
field I have wanted an opportunity to speak with thee. I had intended to come
to thy house for entertainment, but seeing thy slaves at their work, and
observing the manner of their dress, I had no liking to come to partake with
thee." He then admonished him to use them with more humanity, and added,
"As I lay by the fire that night, I thought that as I was a man of
substance thou wouldst have received me freely; but if I had been as poor as
one of thy slaves, and had no power to help myself, I should have received from
thy hand no kinder usage than they."
In
this journey I was out about two months, and travelled about eleven hundred and
fifty miles. I returned home under an humbling sense of the gracious dealings
of the Lord with me, in preserving me through many trials and afflictions.
Chapter V: 1757-1758
Considerations on the Payment of a Tax laid for Carrying on the War
against the Indians - Meetings of the Committee of the Yearly Meeting at
Philadelphia - Some Notes on Thomas a Kempis and John Huss - The present
Circumstances of Friends in Pennsylvania and New Jersey very Different from
those of our Predecessors - The Drafting of the Militia in New Jersey to serve
in the Army, with some Observations on the State of the Members of our Society
at that time - Visit to Friends in Pennsylvania, accompanied by Benjamin Jones
Proceedings at the Monthly, Quarterly, and Yearly Meetings in Philadelphia,
respecting those who keep Slaves.
A
few years past, money being made current in our province for carrying on wars,
and to be called in again by taxes laid on the inhabitants, my mind was often
affected with the thoughts of paying such taxes; and I believe it right for me
to preserve a memorandum concerning it. I was told that Friends in England
frequently paid taxes, when the money was applied to such purposes. I had
conversation with several noted Friends on the subject, who all favored the
payment of such taxes; some of them I preferred before myself, and this made me
easier for a time; yet there was in the depth of my mind a scruple which I
never could get over; and at certain times I was greatly distressed on that
account.
I
believed that there were some upright-hearted men who paid such taxes, yet
could not see that their example was a sufficient reason for me to do so, while
I believe that the spirit of truth required of me, as an individual, to suffer
patiently the distress of goods, rather than pay actively.
To
refuse the active payment of a tax which our Society generally paid was
exceedingly disagreeable; but to do a thing contrary to my conscience appeared
yet more dreadful. When this exercise came upon me, I knew of none under the
like difficulty; and in my distress I besought the Lord to enable me to give up
all that so I might follow him wheresoever he was pleased to lead me. Under
this exercise I went to our Yearly Meeting at Philadelphia in the year 1755; at
which a committee was appointed of some from each Quarterly Meeting, to correspond
with the meeting for sufferers in London; and another to visit our Monthly and
Quarterly Meetings. After their appointment, before the last adjournment of the
meeting, it was agreed that these two committees should meet together in
Friends' school-house in the city, to consider some things in which the cause
of truth was concerned. They accordingly had a weighty conference in the fear
of the Lord; at which time I perceived there were many Friends under a scruple
like that before mentioned.1
[Footnote
1: Christians refused to pay taxes to support heathen temples. See Cave's
Primitive Christianity, Part III., p. 327.]
As
scrupling to pay a tax on account of the application hath seldom been heard of
heretofore, even amongst men of integrity, who have steadily borne their
testimony against outward wars in their time, I may therefore note some things
which have occurred to my mind, as I have been inwardly exercised on that
account. From the steady opposition which faithful Friends in early times made
to wrong things then approved, they were hated and persecuted by men living in
the spirit of this world, and suffering with firmness, they were made a
blessing to the church, and the work prospered. It equally concerns men in
every age to take heed to their own spirits; and in comparing their situation
with ours, to me it appears that there was less danger of their being infected
with the spirit of this world, in paying such taxes, than is the case with us
now. They had little or no share in civil government, and many of them declared
that they were, through the power of God, separated from the spirit in which
wars were, and being afflicted by the rulers on account of their testimony,
there was less likelihood of their uniting in spirit with them in things inconsistent
with the purity of truth. We, from the first settlement of this land, have
known little or no troubles of that sort. The profession of our predecessors
was for a time accounted reproachful, but at length their uprightness being
understood by the rulers, and their innocent sufferings moving them, our way of
worship was tolerated, and many of our members in these colonies became active
in civil government. Being thus tried with favor and prosperity, this world
appeared inviting; our minds have been turned to the improvement of our
country, to merchandise and the sciences, amongst which are many things useful,
if followed in pure wisdom; but in our present condition I believe it will not
be denied that a carnal mind is gaining upon us. Some of our members, who are
officers in civil government, are in one case or other, called upon in their
respective stations to assist in things relative to the wars; but being in
doubt whether to act or to crave to be excused from their office, if they see
their brethren united in the payment of a tax to carry on the said wars, may
think their case not much different, and so might quench the tender movings of
the Holy Spirit in their minds. Thus, by small degrees, we might approach so
near to fighting that the distinction would be little else than the name of a
peaceable people.
It
requires great self-denial and resignation of ourselves to God, to attain that
state wherein we can freely cease from fighting when wrongfully invaded, if, by
our fighting, there were a probability of overcoming the invaders. Whoever
rightly attains to it does in some degree feel that spirit in which our
Redeemer gave his life for us; and through Divine goodness many of our
predecessors, and many now living, have learned this blessed lesson; but many
others, having their religion chiefly by education, and not being enough
acquainted with that cross which crucifies to the world, do manifest a temper
distinguishable from that of an entire trust in God. In calmly considering
these things, it hath not appeared strange to me that an exercise hath now
fallen upon some, which, with respect to the outward means, is different from
what was known to many of those who went before us.
Some
time after the Yearly Meeting, the said committees met at Philadelphia, and, by
adjournments, continued sitting several days. The calamities of war were now
increasing; the frontier inhabitants of Pennsylvania were frequently surprised;
some were slain, and many taken captive by the Indians; and while these
committees sat, the corpse of one so slain was brought in a wagon, and taken
through the streets of the city in his bloody garments, to alarm the people and
rouse them to war.
Friends
thus met were not all of one mind in relation to the tax, which, to those who
scrupled it, made the way more difficult. To refuse an active payment at such a
time might be construed into an act of disloyalty, and appeared likely to
displease the rulers, not only here but in England; still there was a scruple
so fixed on the minds of many Friends that nothing moved it. It was a
conference the most weighty that ever I was at, and the hearts of many were
bowed in reverence before the Most High. Some Friends of the said committees
who appeared easy to pay the tax, after several adjournments, withdrew; others
of them continued till the last. At length an epistle of tender love and
caution to Friends in Pennsylvania was drawn up, and being read several times
and corrected, was signed by such as were free to sign it, and afterward sent
to the Monthly and Quarterly Meetings.
Ninth
of eight month, 1757. - Orders came at night to the military officers in our
country (Burlington), directing them to draft the militia, and prepare a number
of men to go off as soldiers, to the relief of the English at Fort William
Henry, in New York government; a few days after which, there was a general
review of the militia at Mount Holly, and a number of men were chosen and sent
off under some officers. Shortly after, there came orders to draft three times
as many, who were to hold themselves in readiness to march when fresh orders
came. On the 17th there was a meeting of the military officers at Mount Holly,
who agreed on draft; orders were sent to the men so chosen to meet their
respective captains at set times and places, those in our township to meet at
Mount Holly, amongst whom were a considerable number of our Society. My mind
being affected herewith, I had fresh opportunity to see and consider the
advantage of living in the real substance of religion, where practice doth
harmonize with principle. Amongst the officers are men of understanding, who
have some regard to sincerity where they see it; and when such in the execution
of their office have men to deal with whom they believe to be upright-hearted,
it is a painful task to put them to trouble on account of scruples of
conscience, and they will be likely to avoid it as much as easily may be. But
where men profess to be so meek and heavenly-minded, and to have their trust so
firmly settled in God that they cannot join in wars, and yet by their spirit
and conduct in common life manifest a contrary disposition, their difficulties
are great at such a time.
When
officers who are anxiously endeavoring to get troops to answer the demands of
their superiors see men who are insincere pretend scruple of conscience in
hopes of being excused from a dangerous employment, it is likely they will be
roughly handled. In this time of commotion some of our young men left these
parts and tarried abroad till it was over; some came, and proposed to go as
soldiers; others appeared to have a real tender scruple in their minds against
joining in wars, and were much humbled under the apprehension of a trial so
near. I had conversation with several of them to my satisfaction. When the
captain came to town, some of the last-mentioned went and told him in substance
as follows: That they could not bear arms for conscience' sake; nor could they
hire any to go in their places, being resigned as to the event. At length the
captain acquainted them all that they might return home for the present, but he
required them to provide themselves as soldiers, and be in readiness to march
when called upon. This was such a time as I had not seen before; and yet I may
say, with thankfulness to the Lord, that I believed the trial was intended for
our good; and I was favored with resignation to him. The French army having
taken the fort they were besieging, destroyed it and went away; the company of
men who were first drafted, after some days' march, had orders to return home,
and those on the second draft were no more called upon on that occasion.
Fourth
of fourth month, 1758. - Orders came to some officers in Mount Holly to prepare
quarters for a short time for about one hundred soldiers. An officer and two
other men, all inhabitants of our town came to my house. The officer told me
that he came to desire me to provide lodging and entertainment for two
soldiers, and that six shillings a week per man would be allowed as pay for it.
The case being new and unexpected I made no answer suddenly, but sat a time
silent, my mind being inward. I was fully convinced that the proceedings in
wars are inconsistent with the purity of the Christian religion; and to be
hired to entertain men, who were then under pay as soldiers, was a difficulty
with me. I expected they had legal authority for what they did; and after a
short time I said to the officer, if the men sent here for entertainment I
believe I shall not refuse to admit them into my house, but the nature of the
case is such that I expect I cannot keep them on hire; one of the men intimated
that he thought I might do it consistently with my religious principles. To
which I made no reply, believing silence at that time best for me. Though they
spake of two, there came only one, who tarried at my house about two weeks, and
behaved himself civilly. When the officer came to pay me, I told him I could
not take pay, having admitted him into my house in a passive obedience to
authority. I was on horseback when he spake to me, and as I turned from him, he
said he was obliged to me; to which I said nothing; but, thinking on the
expression, I grew uneasy; and afterwards, being near where he lived, I went
and told him on what grounds I refused taking pay for keeping the soldier.
I
have been informed that Thomas a Kempis lived and died in the profession of the
Roman Catholic religion; and, in reading his writings, I have believed him to
be a man of a true Christian spirit, as fully so as many who died martyrs
because they could not join with some superstitions in that church. All true
Christians are of the same spirit, but their gifts are diverse, Jesus Christ
appointing to each one his peculiar office, agreeably to his infinite wisdom.
John
Huss contended against the errors which had crept into the church, in
opposition to the Council of Constance, which the historian reports to have
consisted of some thousand persons. He modestly vindicated the cause which he
believed was right; and though his language and conduct towards his judges
appear to have been respectful, yet he never could be moved from the principles
settled in his mind. To use his own words: "This I most humbly require and
desire of you all, even for his sake who is the God of us all, that I be not
compelled to the thing which my conscience doth repugn or strive against."
And again, in his answer to the Emperor: "I refuse nothing, most noble
Emperor, whatsoever the council shall decree or determine upon me, only this
one thing I except, that I do not offend God and my conscience."2
At length, rather than act contrary to that which he believed the Lord required
of him, he chose to suffer death by fire. Thomas a Kempis, without disputing
against the articles then generally agreed to, appears to have labored, by a
pious example as well as by preaching and writing, to promote virtue and the
inward spiritual religion; and I believe they were both sincere-hearted
followers of Christ. True charity is an excellent virtue; and sincerely to
labor for their good, whose belief in all points doth not agree with ours, is a
happy state.
[Footnote
2: Fox's Acts and Monuments, p. 233.]
Near
the beginning of the year 1758, I went one evening, in company with a friend,
to visit a sick person; and before our return we were told of a woman living
near, who had for several days been disconsolate, occasioned by a dream,
wherein death, and the judgments of the Almighty after death, were represented
to her mind in a moving manner. Her sadness on that account being worn off, the
friend with whom I was in company went to see her, and had some religious
conversation with her and her husband. With this visit they were somewhat
affected, and the man, with many tears, expressed his satisfaction. In a short
time after the poor man, being on the river in a storm of wind, was with one
more drowned.
Eighth
month, 1758. - Having had drawings in my mind to be at the Quarterly Meeting in
Chester County, and at some meetings in the county of Philadelphia, I went
first to said Quarterly Meeting, which was large. Several weighty matters came
under consideration and debate, and the Lord was pleased to qualify some of his
servants with strength and firmness to bear the burden of the day. Though I
said but little, my mind was deeply exercised; and, under a sense of God's
love, in the anointing and fitting of some young men for his work, I was
comforted, and my heart was tendered before him. From hence I went to the
Youth's Meeting at Darby, where my beloved friend and brother Benjamin Jones
met me by appointment before I left home, to join in the visit. We were at
Radnor, Merion, Richland, North Wales, Plymouth, and Abington meetings, and had
cause to bow in reverence before the Lord, our gracious God, by whose help way
was opened for us from day to day. I was out about two weeks, and rode about
two hundred miles.
The
Monthly Meeting of Philadelphia having been under a concern on account of some
Friends who this summer (1758) had bought negro slaves, proposed to their
Quarterly Meeting to have the minute reconsidered in the Yearly Meeting, which
was made last on that subject, and the said Quarterly Meeting appointed a
committee to consider it, and to report to their next. This committee having
met once and adjourned, and I, going to Philadelphia to meet a committee of the
Yearly Meeting, was in town the evening on which the Quarterly Meeting's
committee met the second time, and finding an inclination to sit with them, I,
with some others, was admitted, and Friends had a weighty conference on the
subject. Soon after their next Quarterly meeting I heard that the case was
coming to our Yearly Meeting. This brought a weighty exercise upon me, and
under a sense of my own infirmities, and the great danger I felt of turning
aside from perfect purity, my mind was often drawn to retire alone, and put up
my prayers to the Lord that he would be graciously pleased to strengthen me;
that setting aside all views of self-interest and the friendship of this world,
I might stand fully resigned to his holy will.
In
this Yearly Meeting several weighty matters were considered, and toward the
last that in relation to dealing with persons who purchase slaves. During the
several sittings of the said meeting, my mind was frequently covered with
inward prayer, and I could say with David, "that tears were my meat day
and night." The case of slave-keeping lay heavy upon me, nor did I find
any engagement to speak directly to any other matter before the meeting. Now
when this case was opened several faithful Friends spake weightily thereto,
with which I was comforted; and feeling a concern to cast in my mite, I said in
substance as follows:
"In
the difficulties attending us in this life nothing is more precious than the
mind of truth inwardly manifested; and it is my earnest desire that in this
weighty matter we may be so truly humbled as to be favored with a clear
understanding of the mind of truth, and follow it; this would be of more
advantage to the Society than any medium not in the clearness of Divine wisdom.
The case is difficult to some who have slaves, but if such set aside all
self-interest, and come to be weaned from the desire of getting estates, or
even from holding them together, when truth requires the contrary, I believe
way will so open that they will know how to steer through those
difficulties."
Many
Friends appeared to be deeply bowed under the weight of the work, and
manifested much firmness in their love to the cause of truth and universal
righteousness on the earth. And though none did openly justify the practice of
slave-keeping in general, yet some appeared concerned lest the meeting should
go into such measures as might give uneasiness to many brethren, alleging that
if Friends patiently continued under the exercise the Lord in his time might
open a way for the deliverance of these people. Finding an engagement to speak,
I said, "My mind is often led to consider the purity of the Divine Being,
and the justice of his judgments; and herein my soul is covered with awfulness.
I cannot omit to hint of some cases where people have not been treated with the
purity of justice, and the event hath been lamentable. Many slaves on this
continent are oppressed, and their cries have reached the ears of the Most
High. Such are the purity and certainty of his judgments, that he cannot be
partial in our favor. In infinite love and goodness he hath opened our
understanding from one time to another concerning our duty towards this people,
and it is not a time for delay. Should we now be sensible of what he requires
of us, and through a respect to the private interest of some persons, or
through a regard to some friendships which do not stand on an immutable
foundation, neglect to do our duty in firmness and constancy, still waiting for
some extraordinary means to bring about their deliverance, God may by terrible
things in righteousness answer us in this matter."
Many
faithful brethren labored with great firmness, and the love of truth in a good
degree prevailed. Several who had negroes expressed their desire that a rule
might be made to deal with such Friends as offenders who bought slaves in
future. To this it was answered that the root of this evil would never be
effectually struck at until a thorough search was made in the circumstances of
such Friends as kept negroes, with respect to the righteousness of their
motives in keeping them, that impartial justice might be administered
throughout. Several Friends expressed their desire that a visit might be made
to such Friends as kept slaves, and many others said that they believed liberty
was the negro's right; to which, at length, no opposition was publicly made. A
minute was made more full on that subject than any heretofore; and the names of
several Friends entered who were free to join in a visit to such as kept
slaves.
Chapter VI: 1758-1759
Visit to the Quarterly Meetings in Chester County - Joins Daniel Stanton
and John Scarborough in a Visit to such as kept Slaves there - Some
Observations on the Conduct which those should maintain who speak in Meetings
for Discipline - More Visits to such as kept Slaves, and to Friends near Salem
Account of the Yearly Meeting in the Year 1759, and of the increasing Concern
in Divers Provinces to Labor against Buying and Keeping Slaves - The Yearly
Meeting Epistle - Thoughts on the Small-pox spreading, and on Inoculation.
Eleventh
of eleventh month, 1758. - This day I set out for Concord; the Quarterly
Meeting heretofore held there was now, by reason of a great increase of
members, divided into two by the agreement of Friends at our last Yearly
Meeting. Here I met with our beloved friends Samuel Spavold and Mary Kirby from
England, and with Joseph White from Buck's County; the latter had taken leave
of his family in order to go on a religious visit to Friends in England, and,
through Divine goodness, we were favored with a strengthening opportunity
together.
After
this meeting I joined with my friends, Daniel Stanton and John Scarborough, in
visiting Friends who had slaves. At night we had a family meeting at William
Trimble's, many young people being there; and it was a precious, reviving
opportunity. Next morning we had a comfortable sitting with a sick neighbor,
and thence to the burial of the corpse of a Friend at Uwchland Meeting, at
which were many people, and it was a time of Divine favor, after which we visited
some who had slaves. In the evening we had a family meeting at a Friend's
house, where the channel of the gospel love was opened, and my mind was
comforted after a hard day's labor. The next day we were at Goshen Monthly
Meeting, and on the 18th attended the Quarterly Meeting at London Grove, it
being first held at that place. Here we met again with all the before-mentioned
Friends, and had some edifying meetings. Near the conclusion of the meeting for
business, Friends were incited to constancy in supporting the testimony of
truth, and reminded of the necessity which the disciples of Christ are under to
attend principally to his business as he is pleased to open it to us, and to be
particularly careful to have our minds redeemed from the love of wealth, and
our outward affairs in as little room as may be, that no temporal concerns may
entangle our affections or hinder us from diligently following the dictates of
truth in laboring to promote the pure spirit of meekness and
heavenly-mindedness amongst the children of men in these days of calamity and
distress, wherein God is visiting our land with his just judgments.
Each
of these Quarterly Meetings was large and sat near eight hours. I had occasion
to consider that it is a weighty thing to speak much in large meetings for
business, for except our minds are rightly prepared, and we clearly understand
the case we speak to, instead of forwarding, we hinder business, and make more
labor for those on whom the burden of the work is laid. If selfish views or a
partial spirit have any room in our minds, we are unfit for the Lord's work; if
we have a clear prospect of the business, and proper weight on our minds to
speak, we should avoid useless apologies and repetitions. Where people are
gathered from far, and adjourning a meeting of business is attended with great
difficulty, it behoves all to be cautious how they detain a meeting, especially
when they have sat six or seven hours, and have a great distance to ride home.
After this meeting I rode home.
In
the beginning of the twelfth month I joined, in company with my friends John
Sykes and Daniel Stanton, in visiting such as had slaves. Some whose hearts
were rightly exercised about them appeared to be glad of our visit, but in some
places our way was more difficult. I often saw the necessity of keeping down to
that root from whence our concern proceeded, and have cause, in reverent
thankfulness, humbly to bow down before the Lord, who was near to me, and
preserved my mind in calmness under some sharp conflicts, and begat a spirit of
sympathy and tenderness in me towards some who were grievously entangled by the
spirit of this world.
First
month, 1759. - Having found my mind drawn to visit some of the more active
members in our Society at Philadelphia, who had slaves, I met my friend John
Churchman there by agreement, and we continued about a week in the city. We
visited some that were sick, and some widows and their families, and the other
part of our time was mostly employed in visiting such as had slaves. It was a
time of deep exercise, but looking often to the Lord for his assistance, he in
unspeakable kindness favored us with the influence of that spirit which
crucifies to the greatness and splendor of this world, and enabling us to go
through some heavy labors, in which we found peace.
Twenty-fourth
of third month, 1759. - After attending our general Spring Meeting at
Philadelphia I again joined with John Churchman on a visit to some who had
slaves in Philadelphia, and with thankfulness to our Heavenly Father I may say
that Divine love and a true sympathizing tenderness of heart prevailed at times
in this service.
Having
at times perceived a shyness in some Friends of considerable note towards me, I
found an engagement in gospel love to pay a visit to one of them; and as I
dwelt under the exercise, I felt a resignedness in my mind to go and tell him
privately that I had a desire to have an opportunity with him alone; to this
proposal he readily agreed, and then, in the fear of the Lord, things relating
to that shyness were searched to the bottom, and we had a large conference,
which, I believe was of use to both of us, and I am thankful that way was
opened for it.
Fourteenth
of sixth month. - Having felt drawings in my mind to visit Friends about Salem,
and having the approbation of our Monthly Meeting, I attended their Quarterly
Meeting, and was out seven days, and attended seven meetings; in some of them I
was chiefly silent; in others, through the baptizing power of truth, my heart
was enlarged in heavenly love, and I found a near fellowship with the brethren
and sisters, in the manifold trials attending their Christian progress through
this world.
Seven
month. - I have found an increasing concern on my mind to visit some active
members in our Society who have slaves, and having no opportunity of the
company of such as were named in the minutes of the Yearly Meeting, I went
alone to their houses, and, in the fear of the Lord, acquainted them with the
exercise I was under; and, thus, sometimes by a few words, I found myself
discharged from a heavy burden. After this, our friend John Churchman coming
into our province with a view to be at some meetings, and to join again in the
visit to those who had slaves, I bore him company in the said visit to some
active members, and found inward satisfaction.
At
our Yearly Meeting this year, we had some weighty seasons, in which the power
of truth was largely extended, to the strengthening of the honest minded. As
the epistles which were to be sent to the Yearly Meetings on this continent
were read, I observed that in most of them, both this year and the last, it was
recommended to Friends to labor against buying and keeping slaves, and in some
of them the subject was closely treated upon. As this practice hath long been a
heavy exercise to me, and I have often waded through mortifying labors on that
account, and at times in some meetings have been almost alone therein, I was
humbly bowed in thankfulness in observing the increasing concern in our
religious society, and seeing how the Lord was raising up and qualifying
servants for his work, not only in this respect, but for promoting the cause of
truth in general.
This
meeting continued near a week. For several days, in the fore part of it, my
mind was drawn into a deep inward stillness, and being at times covered with
the spirit of supplication, my heart was secretly poured out before the Lord.
Near the conclusion of the meeting for business, way opened in the pure
flowings of Divine love for me to express what lay upon me, which, as it then
arose in my mind, was first to show how deep answers to deep in the hearts of
the sincere and upright; though, in their different growths, they may not all
have attained to the same clearness in some points relating to our testimony.
And I was then led to mention the integrity and constancy of many martyrs who
gave their lives for the testimony of Jesus, and yet, in some points, they held
doctrines distinguishable from some which we hold, that, in all ages, where
people were faithful to the light and understanding which the Most High
afforded them, they found acceptance with Him, and though there may be
different ways of thinking amongst us in some particulars, yet, if we mutually
keep to that spirit and power which crucifies to the world, which teaches us to
be content with things really needful, and to avoid all superfluities, and give
up our hearts to fear and serve the Lord, true unity may still be preserved
amongst us; that if those who were at times under sufferings on account of some
scruples of conscience kept low and humble, and in their conduct in life
manifested a spirit of true charity, it would be more likely to reach the
witness in others, and be of more service in the church, than if their
sufferings were attended with a contrary spirit and conduct. In this exercise I
was drawn into a sympathizing tenderness with the sheep of Christ, however
distinguished one from another in this world, and the like disposition appeared
to spread over others in the meeting. Great is the goodness of the Lord towards
his poor creatures.
An
epistle went forth from this Yearly Meeting which I think good to give a place
in this Journal. It is as follows.
From
the Yearly Meeting held at Philadelphia, for Pennsylvania and New Jersey, from
the twenty-second day of the ninth month to the twenty-eighth of the same,
inclusive, 1759.
To
the Quarterly and Monthly Meeting of Friends belonging to the said Yearly
Meeting:
Dearly
Beloved Friends and Brethren, - In an awful sense of the wisdom and goodness of
the Lord our God, whose tender mercies have been continued to us in this land,
we affectionately salute you, with sincere and fervent desires that we may
reverently regard the dispensations of his providence, and improve under them.
The
empires and kingdoms of the earth are subject to his almighty power. He is the
God of the spirits of all flesh, and deals with his people agreeable to that
wisdom, the depth whereof is to us unsearchable. We in these provinces may say,
He hath, as a gracious and tender parent, dealt bountifully with us, even from
the days of our fathers. It was he who strengthened them to labor through the
difficulties attending the improvement of a wilderness, and made way for them
in the hearts of the natives, so that by them they were comforted in times of
want and distress. It was by the gracious influences of his Holy Spirit that
they were disposed to work righteousness, and walk uprightly towards each
other, and towards the natives; in life and conversation to manifest the
excellency of the principles and doctrines of the Christian religion whereby
they retain their esteem and friendship. Whilst they were laboring for the
necessaries of life, many of them were fervently engaged to promote piety and
virtue in the earth, and to educate their children in the fear of the Lord.
If
we carefully consider the peaceable measures pursued in the first settlement of
land, and that freedom from the desolations of wars which for a long time we
enjoyed, we shall find ourselves under strong obligations to the Almighty, who,
when the earth is so generally polluted with wickedness, gives us a being in a
part so signally favored with tranquillity and plenty, and in which the glad
tidings of the gospel of Christ are so freely published that we may justly say
with the Psalmist, "What shall we render unto the Lord for all his
benefits?"
Our
own real good, and the good of our posterity, in some measure depends on the
part we act, and it nearly concerns us to try our foundations impartially. Such
are the different rewards of the just and unjust in a future state, that to
attend diligently to the dictates of the spirit of Christ, to devote ourselves
to his service, and to engage fervently in his cause, during our short stay in
this world, is a choice well becoming a free, intelligent creature. We shall
thus clearly see and consider that the dealings of God with mankind, in a
national capacity, as recorded in Holy Writ, do sufficiently evidence the truth
of that saying, "It is righteousness which exalteth a nation"; and
though he doth not at all times suddenly execute his judgments on a sinful
people in this life, yet we see in many instances that when "men follow
lying vanities they forsake their own mercies"; and as a proud, selfish
spirit prevails and spreads among a people, so partial judgment, oppression,
discord, envy, and confusions increase, and provinces and kingdoms are made to
drink the cup of adversity as a reward of their own doings. Thus the inspired
prophet, reasoning with the degenerated Jews, saith, "Thine own wickedness
shall correct thee, and thy backsliding shall reprove thee; know, therefore,
that it is an evil thing and bitter that thou hast forsaken the Lord thy God,
and that my fear is not in thee, saith the Lord God of Hosts." (Jeremiah
ii. 19.)
The
God of our fathers, who hath bestowed on us many benefits, furnished a table
for us in the wilderness, and made the deserts and solitary places to rejoice.
He doth now mercifully call upon us to serve him more faithfully. We may truly
say with the Prophet, "It is his voice which crieth to the city, and men
of wisdom see his name. They regard the rod, and Him who hath appointed
it." People who look chiefly at things outward too little consider the
original cause of the present troubles; but they who fear the Lord and think
often upon his name, see and feel that a wrong spirit is spreading amongst the
inhabitants of our country; that the hearts of many are waxed fat, and their
ears dull of hearing; that the Most High, in his visitations to us, instead of
calling, lifteth up his voice and crieth: he crieth to our country, and his
voice waxeth louder and louder. In former wars between the English and other
nations, since the settlement of our provinces, the calamities attending them
have fallen chiefly on other places, but now of late they have reached to our
borders; many of our fellow-subjects have suffered on and near our frontiers,
some have been slain in battle, some killed in their houses, and some in their
fields, some wounded and left in great misery, and others separated from their
wives and little children, who have been carried captives among the Indians. We
have seen men and women who have been witnesses of these scenes of sorrow, and,
being reduced to want, have come to our houses asking relief. It is not long since
that many young men in one of these provinces were drafted, in order to be
taken as soldiers; some were at that time in great distress, and had occasion
to consider that their lives had been too little conformable to the purity and
spirituality of that religion which we profess, and found themselves too little
acquainted with that inward humility, in which true fortitude to endure
hardness for the truth's sake is experienced. Many parents were concerned for
their children, and in that time of trial were led to consider that their care
to get outward treasure for them had been greater than their care for their
settlement in that religion which crucifieth to the world, and enableth to bear
testimony to the peaceable government of the Messiah. These troubles are
removed, and for a time we are released from them.
Let
us not forget that "The Most High hath his way in the deep, in clouds, and
in thick darkness"; that it is his voice which crieth to the city and to
the country, and O! that these loud and awakening cries may have a proper
effect upon us, that heavier chastisement may not become necessary! For though
things, as to the outward, may for a short time afford a pleasing prospect,
yet, while a selfish spirit, that is not subject to the cross of Christ,
continueth to spread and prevail, there can be no long continuance in outward
peace and tranquillity. If we desire an inheritance incorruptible, and to be at
rest in that state of peace and happiness which ever continues; if we desire in
this life to dwell under the favor and protection of that Almighty Being whose
habitation is in holiness, whose ways are all equal, and whose anger is now
kindled because of our backslidings, - let us then awfully regard these
beginnings of his sore judgments, and with abasement and humiliation turn to
him whom we have offended.
Contending
with one equal in strength is an uneasy exercise; but if the Lord is become our
enemy, if we persist in contending with him who is omnipotent, our overthrow
will be unavoidable.
Do
we feel an affectionate regard to posterity? and are we employed to promote
their happiness? Do our minds, in things outward, look beyond our own
dissolution? and are we contriving for the prosperity of our children after us?
Let us then, like wise builders, lay the foundation deep, and by our constant
uniform regard to an inward piety and virtue let them see that we really value
it. Let us labor in the fear of the Lord, that their innocent minds, while
young and tender, may be preserved from corruptions; that as they advance in
age they may rightly understand their true interest, may consider the
uncertainty of temporal things, and, above all, have their hope and confidence
firmly settled in the blessing of that Almighty Being who inhabits eternity and
preserves and supports the world.
In
all our cares about worldly treasures, let us steadily bear in mind that riches
possessed by children who do not truly serve God are likely to prove snares
that may more grievously entangle them in that spirit of selfishness and exaltation
which stands in opposition to real peace and happiness, and renders those who
submit to the influence of it enemies to the cross of Christ.
To
keep a watchful eye towards real objects of charity, to visit the poor in their
lonesome dwelling-places, to comfort those who, through the dispensations of
Divine Providence, are in strait and painful circumstances in this life, and
steadily to endeavor to honor God with our substance, from a real sense of the
love of Christ influencing our minds, is more likely to bring a blessing to our
children, and will afford more satisfaction to a Christian favored with plenty,
than an earnest desire to collect much wealth to leave behind us; for,
"here we have no continuing city"; may we therefore diligently
"seek one that is to come, whose builder and maker is God."
"Finally,
brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever
things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good
report, if there be any virtue, if there be any praise, think on these things,
and do them, and the God of peace shall be with you."
(Signed
by appointment, and on behalf of said meeting.)
Twenty-eighth
eleventh month. - This day I attended the Quarterly Meeting in Bucks County. In
the meeting of ministers and elders my heart was enlarged in the love of Jesus
Christ, and the favor of the Most High was extended to us in that and the
ensuing meeting.
I
had conversation at my lodging with my beloved friend Samuel Eastburn, who
expressed a concern to join in a visit to some Friends in that county who had
negroes, and as I had felt a drawing in my mind to the said work, I came home
and put things in order. On 11th of twelfth month I went over the river, and on
the next day was at Buckingham Meeting, where, through the descendings of
heavenly dew, my mind was comforted and drawn into a near unity with the flock
of Jesus Christ.
Entering
upon this business appeared weighty, and before I left home my mind was often
sad, under which exercise I felt at times the Holy Spirit which helps our
infirmities, and through which my prayers were at times put up to God in
private that he would be pleased to purge me from all selfishness, that I might
be strengthened to discharge my duty faithfully, how hard soever to the natural
part. We proceeded on the visit in a weighty frame of spirit, and went to the
houses of the most active members who had negroes throughout the county.
Through the goodness of the Lord my mind was preserved in resignation in times
of trial, and though the work was hard to nature, yet through the strength of
that love which is stronger than death, tenderness of heart was often felt
amongst us in our visits, and we parted from several families with greater
satisfaction than we expected.
We
visited Joseph White's family, he being in England; we had also a
family-sitting at the house of an elder who bore us company, and were at
Makefield on a first day: at all which times my heart was truly thankful to the
Lord who was graciously pleased to renew his loving-kindness to us, his poor
servants, uniting us together in his work.
In
the winter of this year, the small-pox being in our town, and many being
inoculated, of whom a few died, some things were opened in my mind, which I
wrote as follows:
The
more fully our lives are conformable to the will of God, the better it is for
us; I have looked on the small-pox as a messenger from the Almighty, to be an
assistant in the cause of virtue, and to incite us to consider whether we
employ our time only in such things as are consistent with perfect wisdom and
goodness. Building houses suitable to dwell in, for ourselves and our
creatures; preparing clothing suitable for the climate and season, and food
convenient, are all duties incumbent on us. And under these general heads are
many branches of business in which we may venture health and life, as necessity
may require.
This
disease being in a house, and my business calling me to go near it, incites me
to consider whether this is a real indispensable duty; whether it is not in
conformity to some custom which would be better laid aside, or, whether it does
not proceed from too eager a pursuit after some outward treasure. If the
business before me springs not from a clear understanding and a regard to that
use of things which perfect wisdom approves, to be brought to a sense of it and
stopped in my pursuit is a kindness, for when I proceed to business without
some evidence of duty, I have found by experience that it tends to weakness.
If
I am so situated that there appears no probability of missing the infection, it
tends to make me think whether my manner of life in things outward has nothing
in it which may unfit my body to receive this messenger in a way the most
favorable to me. Do I use food and drink in no other sort and in no other
degree than was designed by Him who gave these creatures for our sustenance? Do
I never abuse my body by inordinate labor, striving to accomplish some end
which I have unwisely proposed? Do I use action enough in some useful employ,
or do I sit too much idle while some persons who labor to support me have too
great a share of it? If in any of these things I am deficient, to be incited to
consider it is a favor to me. Employment is necessary in social life, and this infection,
which often proves mortal, incites me to think whether these social acts of
mine are real duties. If I go on a visit to the widows and fatherless, do I go
purely on a principle of charity, free from any selfish views? If I go to a
religious meeting it puts me on thinking whether I go in sincerity and in a
clear sense of duty, or whether it is not partly in conformity to custom, or
partly from a sensible delight which my animal spirits feel in the company of
other people, and whether to support my reputation as a religious man has no
share in it.
Do
affairs relating to civil society call me near this infection? If I go, it is
at the hazard of my health and life, and it becomes me to think seriously
whether love to truth and righteousness is the motive of my attending; whether
the manner of proceeding is altogether equitable, or whether aught of
narrowness, party interest, respect to outward dignities, names, or
distinctions among men, do not stain the beauty of those assemblies, and render
it doubtful; in point of duty, whether a disciple of Christ ought to attend as
a member united to the body or not. Whenever there are blemishes which for a
series of time remain such, that which is a means of stirring us up to look
attentively on these blemishes, and to labor according to our capacities, to
have health and soundness restored in our country, we may justly account a
kindness from our gracious Father, who appointed that means.
The
care of a wise and good man for his only son is inferior to the regard of the
great Parent of the universe for his creatures. He hath the command of all the
powers and operations in nature, and "doth not afflict willingly, nor
grieve the children of men." Chastisement is intended for instruction, and
instruction being received by gentle chastisement, greater calamities are
prevented. By an earthquake hundreds of houses are sometimes shaken down in a
few minutes, multitudes of people perish suddenly, and many more, being crushed
and bruised in the ruins of the buildings, pine away and die in great misery.
By
the breaking in of enraged merciless armies, flourishing countries have been
laid waste, great numbers of people have perished in a short time, and many
more have been pressed with poverty and grief. By the pestilence, people have
died so fast in a city, that, through fear, grief, and confusion, those in
health have found great difficulty in burying the dead, even without coffins.
By famine, great numbers of people in some places have been brought to the
utmost distress, and have pined away from want of the necessaries of life.
Thus, when the kind invitations and gentle chastisements of a gracious God have
not been attended to, his sore judgments have at times been poured out upon
people.
While
some rules approved in civil society and conformable to human policy, so
called, are distinguishable from the purity of truth and righteousness, - while
many professing the truth are declining from that ardent love and
heavenly-mindedness which was amongst the primitive followers of Jesus Christ,
it is time for us to attend diligently to the intent of every chastisement, and
to consider the most deep and inward design of them.
The
Most High doth not often speak with an outward voice to our outward ears, but
if we humbly meditate on his perfections, consider that he is perfect wisdom
and goodness, and that to afflict his creatures to no purpose would be utterly
averse to his nature, we shall hear and understand his language both in his
gentle and more heavy chastisements, and shall take heed that we do not, in the
wisdom of this world, endeavor to escape his hand by means too powerful for us.
Had
he endowed men with understanding to prevent this disease (the small-pox) by
means which had never proved hurtful nor mortal, such a discovery might be
considered as the period of chastisement by this distemper, where that
knowledge extended. But as life and health are his gifts, and are not to be
disposed of in our own wills, to take upon us by inoculation when in health a
disorder of which some die, requires great clearness of knowledge that it is
our duty to do so.
Chapter VII: 1760
Visit, in Company with Samuel Eastburn, to Long Island, Rhode Island,
Boston, etc. - Remarks on the Slave-Trade at Newport, also on Lotteries - Some
Observations on the Island of Nantucket.
Fourth
month, 1760. - Having for some time past felt a sympathy in my mind with
Friends eastward, I opened my concern in our Monthly Meeting, and, obtaining a
certificate, set forward on the 17th of this month, in company with my beloved
friend Samuel Eastburn. We had meetings at Woodbridge, Rahway, and Plainfield,
and were at their Monthly Meeting of ministers and elders in Rahway. We labored
under some discouragement, but through the invisible power of truth our visit
was made reviving to the lowly-minded, with whom I felt a near unity of spirit,
being much reduced in my mind. We passed on and visited most of the meetings on
Long Island. It was my concern from day to day to say neither more nor less
than what the spirit of truth opened in me, being jealous over myself lest I
should say anything to make my testimony look agreeable to that mind in people
which is not in pure obedience to the cross of Christ.
The
spring of the ministry was often low, and through the subjecting power of truth
we were kept low with it; from place to place they whose hearts were truly
concerned for the cause of Christ appeared to be comforted in our labors, and
though it was in general a time of abasement of the creature, yet through his
goodness who is a helper of the poor we had some truly edifying seasons both in
meetings and in families where we tarried; sometimes we found strength to labor
earnestly with the unfaithful, especially with those whose station in families
or in the Society was such that their example had a powerful tendency to open
the way for others to go aside from the purity and soundness of the blessed
truth.
At
Jericho, on Long Island, I wrote home as follows:
24th
of the fourth month, 1760.
Dearly
beloved Wife!
We
are favored with health; have been at sundry meetings in East Jersey and on
this island. My mind hath been much in an inward, watchful frame since I left
thee, greatly desiring that our proceedings may be singly in the will of our
Heavenly Father.
As
the present appearance of things is not joyous, I have been much shut up from
outward cheerfulness, remembering that promise, "Then shalt thou delight
thyself in the Lord"; as this from day to day has been revived in my
memory, I have considered that his internal presence in our minds is a delight
of all others the most pure, and that the honest-hearted not only delight in
this, but in the effect of it upon them. He regards the helpless and
distressed, and reveals his love to his children under affliction, who delight
in beholding his benevolence, and in feeling Divine charity moving in them. Of
this I may speak a little, for though since I left you I have often an engaging
love and affection towards thee and my daughter, and friends about home, and
going out at this time, when sickness is so great amongst you, is a trial upon
me; yet I often remember there are many widows and fatherless, many who have
poor tutors, many who have evil examples before them, and many whose minds are
in captivity; for whose sake my heart is at times moved with compassion, so
that I feel my mind resigned to leave you for a season, to exercise that gift
which the Lord hath bestowed on me, which though small compared with some, yet
in this I rejoice, that I feel love unfeigned towards my fellow-creatures. I recommend
you to the Almighty, who I trust, cares for you, and under a sense of his
heavenly love remain,
Thy
loving husband, J.W.
We
crossed from the east end of Long Island to New London, about thirty miles, in
a large open boat; while we were out, the wind rising high, the waves several
times beat over us, so that to me it appeared dangerous, but my mind was at
that time turned to Him who made and governs the deep, and my life was resigned
to him; as he was mercifully pleased to preserve us I had fresh occasion to
consider every day as a day lent to me, and felt a renewed engagement to devote
my time, and all I had, to him who gave it.
We
had five meetings in Narraganset, and went thence to Newport on Rhode Island.
Our gracious Father preserved us in an humble dependence on him through deep
exercises that were mortifying to the creaturely will. In several families in
the country where we lodged, I felt an engagement on my mind to have a
conference with them in private, concerning their slaves; and through Divine
aid I was favored to give up thereto. Though in this concern I differ from many
whose service in travelling is, I believe, greater than mine, yet I do not
think hardly of them for omitting it; I do not repine at having so unpleasant a
task assigned me, but look with awfulness to him who appoints to his servants
their respective employments, and is good to all who serve him sincerely.
We
got to Newport in the evening, and on the next day visited two sick persons,
with whom we had comfortable sittings, and in the afternoon attended the burial
of a Friend. The next day we were at meetings at Newport, in the forenoon and
afternoon; the spring of the ministry was opened, and strength was given to
declare the Word of Life to the people.
The
day following we went on our journey, but the great number of slaves in these
parts, and the continuance of that trade from thence to Guinea, made a deep
impression on me, and my cries were often put up to my Heavenly Father in
secret, that he would enable me to discharge my duty faithfully in such way as
he might be pleased to point out to me.
We
took Swansea, Freetown, and Taunton in our way to Boston, where also we had a
meeting; our exercise was deep, and the love of truth prevailed, for which I
bless the Lord. We went eastward about eighty miles beyond Boston, taking
meetings, and were in a good degree preserved in an humble dependence on that
arm which drew us out; and though we had some hard labor with the disobedient,
by laying things home and close to such as were stout against the truth, yet
through the goodness of God we had at times to partake of heavenly comfort with
those who were meek, and were often favored to part with Friends in the
nearness of true gospel fellowship. We returned to Boston and had another
comfortable opportunity with Friends there, and thence rode back day's journey
eastward of Boston. Our guide being a heavy man, and the weather hot, my
companion and I expressed our freedom to go on without him, to which he
consented, and we respectfully took our leave of him; this we did as believing
the journey would have been hard to him and his horse.
In
visiting the meetings in those parts we were measurably baptized into a feeling
of the state of the Society, and in bowedness of spirit went to the Yearly
Meeting at Newport, where we met with John Storer from England, Elizabeth
Shipley, Ann Gaunt, Hannah Foster, and Mercy Redman, from our parts, all
ministers of the gospel, of whose company I was glad. Understanding that a
large number of slaves had been imported from Africa into that town and were
then on sale by a member of our Society, my appetite failed, and I grew
outwardly weak, and had a feeling of the condition of Habakkuk, as thus
expressed, "When I heard, my belly trembled, my lips quivered, I trembled
in myself, that I might rest in the day of trouble." I had many
cogitations, and was sorely distressed. I was desirous that Friends might
petition the Legislature to use their endeavors to discourage the future
importation of slaves, for I saw that this trade was a great evil, and tended
to multiply troubles, and to bring distresses on the people for whose welfare
my heart was deeply concerned. But I perceived several difficulties in regard
to petitioning, and such was the exercise of my mind that I thought of
endeavoring to get an opportunity to speak a few words in the House of
Assembly, then sitting in town.
This
exercise came upon me in the afternoon on the second day of the Yearly Meeting,
and on going to bed I got no sleep till my mind was wholly resigned thereto. In
the morning I inquired of a Friend how long the Assembly was likely to continue
sitting, who told me it was expected to be prorogued that day or the next. As I
was desirous to attend the business of the meeting, and perceived the Assembly
was likely to separate before the business was over, after considerable
exercise, humbly seeking to the Lord for instruction, my mind settled to attend
on the business of the meeting; on the last day of which I had prepared a short
essay of a petition to be presented to the Legislature, if way opened. And
being informed that there were some appointed by that Yearly Meeting to speak
with those in authority on cases relating to the Society, I opened my mind to
several of them, and showed them the essay I had made, and afterwards I opened
the case in the meeting for business, in substance as follows:
"I
have been under a concern for some time on account of the great number of
slaves which are imported into this colony. I am aware that it is a tender
point to speak to, but apprehend I am not clear in the sight of Heaven without
doing so. I have prepared an essay of a petition to be presented to the
Legislature, if way open; and what I have to propose to this meeting is that
some Friends may be named to withdraw and look over it, and report whether they
believe it suitable to be read in the meeting. If they should think well of
reading it, it will remain for the meeting to consider whether to take any
further notice of it, as a meeting, or not." After a short conference some
Friends went out, and, looking over it, expressed their willingness to have it
read, which being done, many expressed their unity with the proposal, and some
signified that to have the subjects of the petition enlarged upon, and signed
out of meeting by such as were free, would be more suitable than to do it
there. Though I expected at first that if it was done it would be in that way,
yet such was the exercise of my mind that to move it in the hearing of Friends
when assembled appeared to me as a duty, for my heart yearned towards the
inhabitants of these parts, believing that by this trade there had been an
increase of inquietude amongst them, and way had been made for the spreading of
a spirit opposite to that meekness and humility which is a sure resting place
for the soul; and that the continuance of this trade would not only render
their healing more difficult, but would increase their malady.
Having
proceeded thus far, I felt easy to leave the essay amongst Friends, for them to
proceed in it as they believed best. And now an exercise revived in my mind in
relation to lotteries, which were common in those parts. I had mentioned the
subject in a former sitting of this meeting, when arguments were used in favor
of Friends being held excused who were only concerned in such lotteries as were
agreeable to law. And now, on moving it again, it was opposed as before; but
the hearts of some solid Friends appeared to be united to discourage the
practice amongst their members, and the matter was zealously handled by some on
both sides. In this debate it appeared very clear to me that the spirit of
lotteries was a spirit of selfishness, which tended to confuse and darken the
understanding, and that pleading for it in our meetings, which were set apart
for the Lord's work, was not right. In the heat of zeal, I made reply to what
an ancient Friend said, and when I sat down I saw that my words were not enough
seasoned with charity. After this I spoke no more on the subject. At length a
minute was made, a copy of which was to be sent to their several Quarterly
Meetings, inciting Friends to labor to discourage the practice amongst all
professing with us.
Some
time after this minute was made I remained uneasy with the manner of my speaking
to the ancient Friend, and could not see my way clear to conceal my uneasiness,
though I was concerned that I might say nothing to weaken the cause in which I
had labored. After some close exercise and hearty repentence for not having
attended closely to the safe guide, I stood up, and, reciting the passage,
acquainted Friends that though I durst not go from what I had said as to the
matter, yet I was uneasy with the manner of my speaking, believing milder
language would have been better. As this was uttered in some degree of
creaturely abasement after a warm debate, it appeared to have a good savor
amongst us.
The
Yearly Meeting being now over, there yet remained on my mind a secret though
heavy exercise, in regard to some leading active members about Newport, who
were in the practice of keeping slaves. This I mentioned to two ancient Friends
who came out of the country, and proposed to them, if way opened, to have some
conversation with those members. One of them and I, having consulted one of the
most noted elders who had slaves, he, in a respectful manner, encouraged me to
proceed to clear myself of what lay upon me. Near the beginning of the Yearly
Meeting, I had had a private conference with this said elder and his wife,
concerning their slaves, so that the way seemed clear to me to advise with him
about the manner of proceeding. I told him I was free to have a conference with
them all together in a private house; or if he thought they would take it
unkind to be asked to come together, and to be spoken with in the hearing of
one another, I was free to spend some time amongst them, and to visit them all
in their own houses. He expressed his liking to the first proposal, not
doubting their willingness to come together; and, as I proposed a visit to only
ministers, elders, and overseers, he named some others whom he desired might
also be present. A careful messenger being wanted to acquaint them in a proper
manner, he offered to go to all their houses, to open the matter to them, - and
did so. About the eighth hour the next morning we met in the meeting-house
chamber, the last-mentioned country Friend, my companion, and John Storer being
with us. After a short time of retirement, I acquainted them with the steps I
had taken in procuring that meeting, and opened the concern I was under, and we
then proceeded to a free conference upon the subject. My exercise was heavy,
and I was deeply bowed in spirit before the Lord, who was pleased to favor with
the seasoning virtue of truth, which wrought a tenderness amongst us; and the
subject was mutually handled in a calm and peaceful spirit. At length, feeling
my mind released from the burden which I had been under, I took my leave of
them in a good degree of satisfaction; and by the tenderness they manifested in
regard to the practice, and the concern several of them expressed in relation
to the manner of disposing of their negroes after their decease, I believed
that a good exercise was spreading amongst them; and I am humbly thankful to
God, who supported my mind and preserved me in a good degree of resignation
through these trials.
Thou
who sometimes travellest in the work of the ministry, and art made very welcome
by thy friends, seest many tokens of their satisfaction in having thee for
their guest. It is good for thee to dwell deep, that thou mayest feel and
understand the spirits of people. If we believe truth points towards a
conference on some subjects in a private way, it is needful for us to take heed
that their kindness, their freedom, and affability do not hinder us from the
Lord's work. I have experienced that, in the midst of kindness and smooth
conduct, to speak close and home to them who entertains us, on points that
relate to outward interest, is hard labor. Sometimes, when I have felt truth
lead towards it, I have found myself disqualified by a superficial friendship;
and as the sense thereof hath abased me, and my cries have been to the Lord, so
I have been humbled and made content to appear weak, or as a fool for his sake;
and thus a door hath been opened to enter upon it. To attempt to do the Lord's
work in our own way, and to speak of that which is the burden of the Word, in a
way easy to the natural part, doth not reach the bottom of the disorder. To see
the failings of our friends, and think hard to them, without opening that which
we ought to open, and still carry a face of friendship, tends to undermine the
foundation of true unity. The office of a minister of Christ is weighty. And
they who now go forth as watchmen have need to be steadily on their guard
against the snares of prosperity and an outside friendship.
After
the Yearly Meeting we were at meetings at Newtown, Cushnet, Long Plain,
Rochester, and Dartmouth. From thence we sailed for Nantucket, in company with
Ann Gaunt, Mercy Redman, and several other Friends. The wind being slack we
only reached Tarpawling Cove the first day; where, going on shore, we found
room in a public-house, and beds for a few of us, - the rest slept on the
floor. We went on board again about break of day, and though the wind was
small, we were favored to come within about four miles of Nantucket; and then
about ten of us got into our boat and rowed to the harbor before dark; a large
boat went off and brought in the rest of the passengers about midnight. The
next day but one was their Yearly Meeting, which held four days, the last of
which was their Monthly Meeting for business. We had a laborious time amongst
them; our minds were closely exercised, and I believe it was a time of great
searching of heart. The longer I was on the Island the more I became sensible
that there was a considerable number of vulnerable Friends there, though an
evil spirit, tending to strife, had been at work amongst them. I was cautious
of making any visits except as my mind was particularly drawn to them; and in
that way we had some sittings in Friend's houses, where the heavenly wing was
as times spread over us, to our mutual comfort. My beloved companion had very
acceptable service on this island.
When
meeting was over we all agreed to sail the next day if the weather was suitable
and we were well; and being called up the latter part of the night, about fifty
of us went on board a vessel; but, the wind changing. The seamen thought best
to stay in the harbor till it altered, so we returned on shore. Feeling clear
as to any further visits, I spent my time in my chamber, chiefly alone, and
after some hours, my heart being filled with the spirit of supplication, my
prayers and tears were poured out before my Heavenly Father for his help and
instruction in the manifold difficulties which attended me in life. While I was
waiting upon the Lord, there came a messenger from the women Friends who lodged
at another house, desiring to confer with us about appointing a meeting, which
to me appeared weighty, as we had been at so many before; but after a short
conference, and advising with some elderly Friends, a meeting was appointed, in
which the Friend who first move it, and who had been much shut up before, was
largely opened in the love of the gospel. The next morning about break of day
going again on board the vessel, we reached Falmouth on the Main before night,
where our horses being brought, we proceeded towards Sandwich Quarterly
Meeting.
Being
two days in going to Nantucket, and having been there once before, I observed
many shoals in their bay, which make sailing more dangerous, especially in
stormy nights; also, that a great shoal, which encloses their harbor, prevents
the entrance of sloops except when the tide is up. Waiting without for the
rising of the tide is sometimes hazardous in storms, and by waiting within they
sometimes miss a fair wind. I took notice that there was on that small island a
great number of inhabitants, and the soil not very fertile, the timber being so
gone that for vessels, fences, and firewood, they depend chiefly on buying from
the Main, for the cost whereof, with most of their other expenses, they depend
principally upon the whale fishery. I considered that as towns grew larger, and
lands near navigable waters were more cleared, it would require more labor to
get timber and wood. I understood that the whales, being much hunted and
sometimes wounded and not killed, grow more shy and difficult to come at. I
considered that the formation of the earth, the seas, the islands, bays, and
rivers, the motions of the winds, and great waters, which cause bars and shoals
in particular places, were all the works of Him who is perfect wisdom and
goodness; and as people attend to his heavenly instruction, and put their trust
in him, he provides for them in all parts where he gives them a being; and as
in this visit to these people I felt a strong desire for their firm
establishment on the sure foundation, besides what was said more publicly, I
was concerned to speak with the women Friends in their Monthly Meeting of
business, many being present, and in the fresh spring of pure love to open
before them the advantage, both inwardly and outwardly, of attending singly to
the pure guidance of the Holy Spirit, and therein to educate their children in
true humility and the disuse of all superfluities. I reminded them of the
difficulties their husbands and sons were frequently exposed to at sea, and
that the more plain and simple their way of living was the less need there
would be of running great hazards to support them, I also encouraged the young
women to continue their neat, decent way of attending themselves on the affairs
of the house; showing, as the way opened, that where people were truly humble,
used themselves to business, and were content with a plain way of life, they
had ever had more true peace and calmness of mind than they who, aspiring to
greatness and outward show, have grasped hard for an income to support
themselves therein. And as I observed they had so few or no slaves, I had to encourage
them to be content without them, making mention of the numerous troubles and
vexations which frequently attended the minds of the people who depend on
slaves to do their labor.
We
attended the Quarterly Meeting at Sandwich, in company with Ann Gaunt and Mercy
Redman, which was preceded by a Monthly Meeting, and in the whole held three
days. We were in various ways exercised amongst them, in gospel love, according
to the several gifts bestowed on us, and were at times overshadowed with the
virtue of truth, to the comfort of the sincere and stirring up of the
negligent. Here we parted with Ann and Mercy, and went to Rhode Island, taking
one meeting in our way, which was a satisfactory time. Reaching Newport the
evening before their Quarterly Meeting, we attended it, and after that had a
meeting with our young people, separated from those of other societies. We went
through much labor in this town; and now, in taking leave of it, though I felt
close inward exercise to the last, I found inward peace, and was in some degree
comforted in a belief that a good number remain in that place who retain a
sense of truth, and that there are some young people attentive to the voice of
the Heavenly Shepherd. The last meeting, in which Friends from the several parts
of the quarter came together, was a select meeting, and through the renewed
manifestation of the Father's love the hearts of the sincere were united
together.
The
poverty of spirit and inward weakness, with which I was much tried the fore
part of this journey, has of late appeared to me a dispensation of kindness.
Appointing meetings never appeared more weighty to me, and I was led into a
deep search, whether in all things my mind was resigned to the will of God;
often querying with myself what should be the cause of such inward poverty, and
greatly desiring that no secret reserve in my heart might hinder my access to
the Divine fountain. In these humbling times I was made watchful, and excited
to attend to the secret movings of the heavenly principle in my mind, which
prepared the way to some duties that in more easy and prosperous times as to
the outward, I believe I should have been in danger of omitting.
From
Newport we went to Greenwich, Shanticut, and Warwick, and were helped to labor
amongst Friends in the love of our gracious Redeemer. Afterwards, accompanied
by our friend John Casey from Newport, we rode through Connecticut to Oblong,
visited the meetings in those parts, and thence proceeded to the Quarterly
Meeting at Ryewoods. Through the gracious extendings of Divine help, we had
some seasoning opportunities in those places. We also visited Friends at New
York and Flushing, and thence to Rahway. Here our roads parting, I took leave
of my beloved companion and true yokemate Samuel Eastburn, and reached home the
10th of eighth month, where I found my family well. For the favors and
protection of the Lord, both inward and outward, extended to me in this
journey, my heart is humbled in grateful acknowledgments, and I find renewed
desires to dwell and walk in resignedness before him.
Chapter VIII: 1761-1762
Visits Pennsylvania, Shrewsbury, and Squan - Publishes the Second Part
of his Considerations on keeping Negroes - The Grounds of his appearing in some
Respects singular in his Dress - Visit to the Families of Friends of Ancocas
and Mount Holly Meetings - Visits to the Indians at Wehaloosing on the River
Susquehanna.
Having
felt my mind drawn towards a visit to a few meetings in Pennsylvania, I was
very desirous to be rightly instructed as to the time of setting off. On the
10th of the fifth month, 1761, being the first day of the week, I went to
Haddonfield Meeting, concluding to seek for heavenly instruction, and come
home, or go on as I might then believe best for me, and there through the
springing up of pure love I felt encouragement, and so crossed the river. In
this visit I was at two quarterly and three monthly meetings, and in the love
of truth I felt my way open to labor with some noted Friends who kept negroes.
As I was favored to keep to the root, and endeavor to discharge what I believed
was required of me. I found inward peace therein, from time to time, and
thankfulness of heart to the Lord, who was graciously pleased to be a guide to
me.
Eighth
month, 1761. - Having felt drawings in my mind to visit Friends in and about
Shrewsbury, I went there, and was at their Monthly Meeting, and their first-day
meeting; I had also a meeting at Squan, and another at Squanquam, and, as way
opened, had conversation with some noted Friends concerning their slaves. I
returned home in a thankful sense of the goodness of the Lord.
From
the concern I felt growing in me for some years, I wrote part the second of a
work entitled "Considerations on keeping Negroes," which was printed
this year, 1762. When the overseers of the press had done with it, they offered
to get a number printed, to be paid for out of the Yearly Meeting's stock, to
be given away; but I being most easy to publish it at my own expense, and
offering my reasons, they appeared satisfied.
This
stock is the contribution of the members of our religious society in general,
among whom are some who keep negroes, and, being inclined to continue them in
slavery, are not likely to be satisfied with such books being spread among a
people, especially at their own expense, many of whose slaves are taught to
read, and such, receiving them as a gift, often conceal them. But as they who
make a purchase generally but that which they have a mind for, I believed it
best to sell them, expecting by that means they would more generally be read
with attention. Advertisements were signed by order of the overseers of the
press, and directed to be read in the Monthly Meetings of business within our
own Yearly Meeting, informing where the books were, and that the price was no more
than the cost of printing and binding them. Many were taken off in our parts;
some I sent to Virginia, some to New York, some to my acquaintance at Newport,
and some I kept, intending to give part of them away, where there appeared a
prospect of service.
In
my youth I was used to hard labor, and though I was middling healthy, yet my
nature was not fitted to endure so much as many others. Being often weary, I
was prepared to sympathize with those whose circumstances in life, as free men,
required constant labor to answer the demands of their creditors, as well as
with others under oppression. In the uneasiness of body which I have many times
felt by too much labor, not as a forced but a voluntary oppression, I have
often been excited to think on the original cause of that oppression which is
imposed on many in the world. The latter part of the time wherein I labored on
our plantation, my heart, through the fresh visitations of heavenly love, being
often tender, and my leisure time being frequently spent in reading the life
and doctrines of our blessed Redeemer, the account of the sufferings of
martyrs, and the history of the first rise of our Society, a belief was
gradually settled in my mind, that if such as had great estates generally lived
in that humility and plainness which belong to a Christian life, and laid much
easier rents and interests on their lands and moneys, and thus led the way to a
right use of things, so great a number of people might be employed in things
useful, that labor both for men and other creatures would need to be no more
than an agreeable employ, and divers branches of business, which serve chiefly
to please the natural inclinations of our minds, and which at present seem
necessary to circulate that wealth which some gather, might, in this way of
pure wisdom, be discontinued. As I have thus considered these things, a query
at times hath arisen: Do I, in all my proceedings, keep to that use of things
which is agreeable to universal righteousness? And then there hath some degree
of sadness at times come over me, because I accustomed myself to some things
which have occasioned more labor than I believe Divine wisdom intended for us.
From
my early acquaintance with truth I have often felt an inward distress,
occasioned by the striving of a spirit in me against the operation of the
heavenly principle; and in this state I have been affected with a sense of my
own wretchedness, and in a mourning condition have felt earnest longings for
that Divine help which brings the soul into true liberty. Sometimes, on
retiring into private places, the spirit of supplication hath been given me,
and under a heavenly covering I have asked my gracious Father to give me a
heart in all things resigned to the direction of his wisdom; in uttering
language like this, the thought of my wearing hats and garments dyed with a dye
hurtful to them, has made lasting impression on me.
In
visiting people of note in the Society who had slaves, and laboring with them
in brotherly love on that account. I have seen, and the sight has affected me,
that a conformity to some customs distinguishable from pure wisdom had
entangled many, and that the desire of gain to support these customs has
greatly opposed the work of truth. Sometimes when the prospect of the work
before me has been such that in bowedness of spirit I have been drawn into
retired places, and have besought the Lord with tears that he would take me
wholly under his direction, and show me the way in which I ought to walk, it
hath revived with strength of conviction that if I would be his faithful
servant I must in all things attend to his wisdom, and be teachable, and so
cease from all customs contrary thereto, however used among religious people.
As
he is the perfection of power, of wisdom, and of goodness, so I believe he hath
provided that so much labor shall be necessary for men's support in this world
as would, being rightly divided, be a suitable employment of their time; and
that we cannot go into superfluities, or grasp after wealth in a way contrary
to his wisdom, without having connection with some degree of oppression, and
with that spirit which leads to self exaltation and strife, and which
frequently brings calamities on countries by parties contending about their
claims.
Being
thus fully convinced, and feeling an increasing desire to live in the spirit of
peace, I have often been sorrowfully affected with thinking on the unquiet
spirit in which wars are generally carried on, and with the miseries of many of
my fellow-creatures engaged therein; some suddenly destroyed; some wounded, and
after much pain remaining cripples; some deprived of all their outward
substance and reduced to want; and some carried into captivity. Thinking often
on these things, the use of hats and garments dyed with a dye hurtful to them,
and wearing more clothes in summer than are useful, grew more uneasy to me,
believing them to be customs which have not their foundation in pure wisdom.
The apprehension of being singular from my beloved friends was a strait upon
me, and thus I continued in the use of some things contrary to my judgment.
On
the 31st of fifth month, 1761, I was taken ill of a fever, and after it had
continued near a week I was in great distress of body. One day there was a cry
raised in me that I might understand the cause of my affliction, and improve
under it, and my conformity to some customs which I believed were not right was
brought to my remembrance. In the continuance of this exercise I felt all the
powers in me yield themselves up into the hands of Him who gave me being, and
was made thankful that he had taken hold of me by his chastisements. Feeling
the necessity of further purifying, there was now no desire in me for health
until the design of my correction was answered. Thus I lay in abasement and
brokenness of spirit, and as I felt a sinking down into a calm resignation, so
I felt, as in an instant, an inward healing in my nature, and from that time
forward I grew better.
Though
my mind was thus settled in relation to hurtful dyes, I felt easy to wear my garments
heretofore made, and continued to do so about nine months. Then I thought of
getting a hat the natural color of the fur, but the apprehension of being
looked upon as one affecting singularity felt uneasy to me. Here I had occasion
to consider that things, though small in themselves, being clearly enjoined by
Divine authority, become great things to us; and I trusted that the Lord would
support me in the trials that might attend singularity, so long as singularity
was only for his sake. On this account I was under close exercise of mind in
the time of our General Spring Meeting, 1762, greatly desiring to be rightly
directed; when, being deeply bowed in spirit before the Lord, I was made
willing to submit to what I apprehended was required of me, and when I returned
home got a hat of the natural color of the fur.
In
attending meetings this singularity was a trial to me, and more especially at
this time, as white hats were used by some who were fond of following the
changeable modes of dress, and as some Friends who knew not from what motives I
wore it grew shy of me, I felt my way for a time shut up in the exercise of the
ministry. In this condition, my mind being turned toward my Heavenly Father
with fervent cries that I might be preserved to walk before him in the meekness
of wisdom, my heart was often tender in meetings, and I felt an inward
consolation which to me was very precious under these difficulties.
I
had several dyed garments fit for use which I believed it best to wear till I
had occasion for new ones. Some Friends were apprehensive that my wearing such
a hat savored of an affected singularity; those who spoke with me in a friendly
way I generally informed, in a few words, that I believed my wearing it was not
in my own will. I had at times been sensible that a superficial friendship had
been dangerous to me; and many Friends being now uneasy with me, I had an
inclination to acquaint some with the manner of my being led into these things;
yet upon a deeper thought I was for a time most easy to omit it, believing the
present dispensation was profitable, and trusting that if I kept my place the
Lord in his own time would open the hearts of Friends towards me. I have since
had cause to admire his goodness and loving-kindness in leading about and instructing
me, and in opening and enlarging my heart in some of our meetings.
In
the eleventh month this year, feeling an engagement of mind to visit some
families in Mansfield, I joined my beloved friend Benjamin Jones, and we spent
a few days together in that service. In the second month, 1763, I joined, in
company with Elizabeth Smith and Mary Noble, in a visit to the families of
Friends at Ancocas. In both these visits, through the baptizing power of truth,
the sincere laborers were often comforted, and the hearts of Friends opened to
receive us. In the fourth month following, I accompanied some Friends in a
visit to the families of Friends in Mount Holly; during this visit my mind was
often drawn into an inward awfulness, wherein strong desires were raised for
the everlasting welfare of my fellow-creatures, and through the kindness of our
Heavenly Father our hearts were at times enlarged, and Friends were invited, in
the flowings of Divine love, to attend to that which would settle them on the
sure foundation.
Having
for many years felt love in my heart towards the natives of this land who dwell
far back in the wilderness whose ancestors were formerly the owners and
possessors of the land where we dwell, and who for a small consideration
assigned their inheritance to us, and being at Philadelphia in the 8th month,
1761, on a visit to some Friends who had slaves, I fell in company with some of
those natives who lived on the east branch of the river Susquehanna, at an
Indian town called Wehaloosing, two hundred miles from Philadelphia. In
conversation with them by an interpreter, as also by observations on their
countenances and conduct, I believed some of them were measurably acquainted
with that Divine power which subjects the rough and froward will of the
creature. At times I felt inward drawings towards a visit to that place, which
I mentioned to none except my dear wife until it came to some ripeness. In the
winter of 1762 I laid my prospects before my friends at our Monthly and
Quarterly, and afterwards at our General Spring Meeting; and having the unity
of Friends, and being thoughtful about an Indian pilot, there came a man and
three women from a little beyond that town to Philadelphia on business. Being
informed thereof by letter, I met them in town in the 5th month, 1763; and
after some conversation, finding they were sober people, I, with the
concurrence of Friends in that place, agreed to join them as companions in
their return, and we appointed to meet at Samuel Foulk's, at Richland, in Bucks
County, on the 7th of sixth month. Now, as this visit felt weighty, and was
performed at a time when travelling appeared perilous, so the dispensations of
Divine Providence in preparing my mind for it have been memorable, and I
believe it good for me to give some account thereof.
After
I had given up to go, the thoughts of the journey were often attended with
unusual sadness; at which times my heart was frequently turned to the Lord with
inward breathings for his heavenly support, that I might not fail to follow him
wheresoever he might lead me. Being at our youth's meeting at Chesterfield,
about a week before the time I expected to set off, I was there led to speak on
that prayer of our Redeemer to the Father: "I pray not that thou shouldest
take them out of the world, but that thou shouldest keep them from the
evil." And in attending to the pure openings of truth, I had to mention
what he elsewhere said to his Father: "I know that thou hearest me at all
times"' so, as some of his followers kept their places, and as his prayer
was granted, it followed necessarily that they were kept from evil; and as some
of those met with great hardships and afflictions in this world, and at last
suffered death by cruel men, so it appears that whatsoever befalls men while
they live in pure obedience to God certainly works for their good, and may not
be considered an evil as it relates to them. As I spake on this subject my
heart was much tendered, and great awfulness came over me. On the first day of
the week, being at our own afternoon meeting, and my heart being enlarged in
love, I was led to speak on the care and protection of the Lord over his
people, and to make mention of that passage where a band of Syrians, who were
endeavoring to take captive the prophet, were disappointed; and how the
Psalmist said, "The angel of the Lord encampeth round about them that fear
him." Thus, in true love and tenderness, I parted from Friends, expecting
the next morning to proceed on my journey. Being weary I went early to bed.
After I had been asleep a short time I was awoke by a man calling at my door,
and inviting me to meet some Friends at a public-house in our town, who came
from Philadelphia so late that Friends were generally gone to bed. These
Friends informed me that an express had arrived the last morning from
Pittsburg, and brought news that the Indians had taken a fort from the English
westward, and had slain and scalped some English people near the said
Pittsburg, and in divers places. Some elderly Friends in Philadelphia, knowing
the time of my intending to set off, had conferred together, and thought good
to inform me of these things before I left home, that I might consider them and
proceed as I believed best. Going to bed again, I told not my wife till
morning. My heart was turned to the Lord for his heavenly instruction; and it
was an humbling time to me. When I told my dear wife, she appeared to be deeply
concerned about it; but in a few hour's time my mind became settled in a belief
that it was my duty to proceed on my journey, and she bore it with a good
degree of resignation. In this conflict of spirit there were great searchings
of heart and strong cries to the Lord, that no motion might in the least degree
be attended to but that of the pure spirit of truth.
The
subjects before mentioned, on which I had so lately spoken in public, were now
fresh before me, and I was brought inwardly to commit myself to the Lord, to be
disposed of as he saw best. I took leave of my family and neighbors in much
bowedness of spirit, and went to our Monthly Meeting at Burlington. After
taking leave of Friends there, I crossed the river, accompanied by my friends
Israel and John Pemberton; and parting the next morning with Israel, John bore
me company to Samuel Foulk's, where I met the before-mentioned Indians; and we
were glad to see each other. Here my friend Benjamin Parvin met me, and
proposed joining me as a companion, - we had before exchanged some letters on
the subject, - and now I had a sharp trial on his account; for, as the journey
appeared perilous, I thought if he went chiefly to bear me company, and we
should be taken captive, my having been the means of drawing him into these
difficulties would add to my own afflictions; so I told him my mind freely, and
let him know that I was resigned to go alone; but after all, if he really
believed it to be his duty to go on, I believed his company would be very
comfortable to me. It was, indeed, a time of deep exercise, and Benjamin
appeared to be so fastened to the visit that he could not be easy to leave me;
so we went on, accompanied by our friends John Pemberton and William Lightfoot
of Pikeland. We lodged at Bethlehem, and there parting with John, William and
we went forward on the 9th of the sixth month, and got lodging on the floor of
a house, about five miles from Fort Allen. Here we parted with William, and at
this place we met with an Indian trader lately come from Wyoming. In
conversation with him, I perceived that many white people often sell rum to the
Indians, which I believe is a great evil. In the first place, they are thereby
deprived of the use of reason, and their spirits being violently agitated,
quarrels often arise which end in mischief, and the bitterness and resentment
occasioned hereby are frequently of long continuance. Again, their skins and
furs, gotten through much fatigue and hard travels in hunting, with which they
intended to buy clothing, they often sell at a low rate for more rum, when they
become intoxicated; and afterward, when they suffer for want of the necessaries
of life, are angry with those who, for the sake of gain, took advantage of
their weakness. Their chiefs have often complained of this in their treaties
with the English. Where cunning people pass counterfeits and impose on others
that which is good for nothing, it is considered as wickedness; but for the
sake of gain to sell that which we know does people harm, and which often works
their ruin, manifests a hardened and corrupt heart, and is an evil which
demands the care of all true lovers of virtue to suppress. While my mind this
evening was thus employed, I also remembered that the people on the frontiers,
among whom this evil is too common, are often poor; and that they venture to
the outside of a colony in order to live more independently of the wealthy, who
often set high rents on their land. I was renewedly confirmed in a belief, that
if all our inhabitants lived according to sound wisdom, laboring to promote
universal love and righteousness, and ceased from every inordinate desire after
wealth, and from all customs which are tinctured with luxury, the way would be
easy for our inhabitants, though they might be much more numerous than at
present, to live comfortably on honest employments, without the temptation they
are so often under of being drawn into schemes to make settlements on lands
which have not been purchased of the Indians, or of applying to that wicked
practice of selling rum to them.
Tenth
of sixth month. - We set out early this morning and crossed the western branch
of Delaware, called the Great Lehie, near Fort Allen. The water being high, we
went over in a canoe. Here we met an Indian, had friendly conversation with
him, and gave him some biscuit; and he, having killed a deer, gave some of it
to the Indians with us. After travelling some miles, we met several Indian men
and women with a cow and horse, and some household goods, who were lately come
from their dwelling at Wyoming, and were going to settle at another place. We
made them some small presents, and, as some of them understood English, I told
them my motive for coming into their country, with which they appeared
satisfied. One of our guides talking awhile with an ancient woman concerning
us, the poor old woman came to my companion and me and took her leave of us
with an appearance of sincere affection. We pitched our tent near the banks of
the same river, having labored hard in crossing some of those mountains called
the Blue Ridge. The roughness of the stones and the cavities between them, with
the steepness of the hills, made it appear dangerous. But we were preserved in
safety, through the kindness of Him whose works in these mountainous deserts
appeared awful, and towards whom my heart was turned during this day's travel.
Near
our tent, on the sides of large trees peeled for that purpose, were various
representations of men going to and returning from the wars, and of some being
killed in battle. This was a path heretofore used by warriors, and as I walked
about viewing those Indian histories, which were painted mostly in red or black;
and thinking on the innumerable afflictions which the proud, fierce spirit
produceth in the world, also on the toils and fatigues of warriors in
travelling over mountains and deserts; on their miseries and distresses when
far from home and wounded by their enemies; of their bruises and great
weariness in chasing one another over the rocks and mountains; of the restless,
unquiet state of mind of those who live in this spirit, and of the hatred which
mutually grows up in the minds of their children, - the desire to cherish the
spirit of love and peace among these people arose very fresh in me. This was
the first night that we lodged in the woods, and being wet with travelling in
the rain, as were also blankets, the ground, our tent, and the bushes under which
we purposed to lay, all looked discouraging; but I believed that it was the
Lord who had thus far brought me forward, and that he would dispose of me as he
saw good, and so I felt easy. We kindled a fire, with our tent open to it, then
laid some bushes next the ground, and put our blankets upon them for our bed,
and, lying down, got some sleep. In the morning, feeling a little unwell, I
went into the river; the water was cold, but soon after I felt fresh and well.
About eight o'clock we set forward and crossed a high mountain supposed to be
upward of four miles over, the north side being the steepest. About noon we
were overtaken by one of the Moravian brethren going to Wehaloosing, and an
Indian man with him who could talk English; and we being together while our
horses ate grass had some friendly conversation; but they, travelling faster
than we, soon left us. This Moravian, I understood, has this spring spent some
time at Wehaloosing, and was invited by some of the Indians to come again
Twelfth
of sixth month being the first of the week and a rainy day, we continued in our
tent, and I was led to think on the nature of the exercise which hath attended
me. Love was the first motion, and thence a concern arose to spend some time
with the Indians, that I might feel and understand their life and the spirit
they live in, if haply I might receive some instruction from them, or they
might be in any degree helped forward by my following the leadings of truth
among them; and as it pleased the Lord to make way for my going at a time when
the troubles of war were increasing, and when, by reason of much wet weather,
travelling was more difficult than usual at that season, I looked upon it as a
more favorable opportunity to season my mind, and to bring me into a nearer
sympathy with them. As mine eye was to the great Father of Mercies, humbly
desiring to learn his will concerning me, I was made quiet and content.
Our
guide's horse strayed, though hoppled, in the night, and after searching some
time for him his footsteps were discovered in the path going back, whereupon my
kind companion went off in the rain, and after about seven hours returned with
him. Here we lodged again, tying up our horses before we went to bed, and
loosing them to feed about break of day.
Thirteenth
of sixth month. - The sun appearing, we set forward, and as I rode over the
barren hills my meditations were on the alterations in the circumstances of the
natives of this land since the coming in of the English. The lands near the sea
are conveniently situated for fishing; the lands near the rivers, where the
tides flow, and some above, are in many places fertile, and not mountainous,
while the changing of the tides makes passing up and down easy with any kind of
traffic. The natives have in some places, for trifling considerations, sold
their inheritance so favorably situated, and in other places have been driven
back by superior force; their way of clothing themselves is also altered from
what it was, and they being far removed from us have to pass over mountains,
swamps, and barren deserts, so that travelling is very troublesome in bringing
their skins and furs to trade with us. By the extension of English settlements,
and partly by the increase of English hunters, the wild beasts on which the
natives chiefly depend for subsistence are not so plentiful as they were, and
people too often, for the sake of gain, induce them to waste their skins and
furs in purchasing a liquor which tends to the ruin of them and their families.
My
own will and desires were now very much broken, and my heart was with much
earnestness turned to the Lord, to whom alone I looked for help in the dangers
before me. I had a prospect of the English along the coast for upwards of nine
hundred miles, where I travelled, and their favorable situation and the
difficulties attending the natives as well as the negroes in many places were
open before me. A weighty and heavenly care came over my mind, and love filled
my heart towards all mankind, in which I felt a strong engagement that we might
be obedient to the Lord while in tender mercy he is yet calling to us, and that
we might so attend to pure universal righteousness as to give no just cause of
offence to the gentiles, who do not profess Christianity, whether they be the
blacks from Africa, or the native inhabitants of this continent. Here I was led
into a close and laborious inquiry whether I, as an individual, kept clear from
all things which tended to stir up or were connected with wars, either in this
land or in Africa; my heart was deeply concerned that in future I might in all
things keep steadily to the pure truth, and live and walk in the plainness and
simplicity of a sincere follower of Christ. In this lonely journey I did
greatly bewail the spreading of a wrong spirit, believing that the prosperous,
convenient situation of the English would require a constant attention in us to
Divine love and wisdom, in order to their being guided and supported in a way
answerable to the will of that good, gracious, and Almighty Being, who hath an
equal regard to all mankind. And here luxury and covetousness, with the
numerous oppressions and other evils attending them, appeared very afflicting
to me, and I felt in that which is immutable that the seeds of great calamity
and desolation are sown and growing fast on this continent. Nor have I words
sufficient to set forth the longing I then felt, that we who are placed along
the coast, and have tasted the love and goodness of God, might arise in the
strength thereof, and life faithful messengers labor to check the growth of
these seeds, that they may not ripen to the ruin of our posterity.
On
reaching the Indian settlement at Wyoming, we were told that an Indian runner
had been at that place a day or two before us, and brought news of the Indians
having taken an English fort westward, and destroyed the people, and that they
were endeavoring to take another; also that another Indian runner came there
about the middle of the previous night from a town about ten miles from
Wehaloosing, and brought the news that some Indian warriors from distant parts
came to that town with two English scalps, and told the people that it was war
with the English.
Our
guides took us to the house of a very ancient man. Soon after we had put in our
baggage there came a man from another Indian house some distance off.
Perceiving there was a man near the door I went out; the man had a tomahawk
wrapped under his match-coat out of sight. As I approached him he took it in
his hand; I went forward, and, speaking to him in a friendly way, perceived he
understood some English. My companion joining me, we had some talk with him
concerning the nature of our visit in these parts; he then went into the house
with us, and, talking with our guides, soon appeared friendly, sat down and
smoked his pipe. Though taking his hatchet in his hand at the instant I drew
near to him had a disagreeable appearance, I believe he had no other intent
than to be in readiness in case any violence were offered to him.
On
hearing the news brought by these Indian runners, and being told by the Indians
where we lodged, that the Indians about Wyoming expected in a few days to move
to some larger towns, I thought, to all outward appearance, it would be
dangerous travelling at this time. After a hard day's journey I was brought
into a painful exercise at night, in which I had to trace back and view the
steps I had taken from my first moving in the visit; and though I had to bewail
some weakness which at times had attended me, yet I could not find that I had
ever given way to wilful disobedience. Believing I had, under a sense of duty,
come thus far, I was now earnest in spirit, beseeching the Lord to show me what
I ought to do. In this great distress I grew jealous of myself, lest the desire
of reputation as a man firmly settled to persevere through dangers, or the fear
of disgrace from my returning without performing the visit, might have some
place in me. Full of these thoughts, I lay great part of the night, while my
beloved companion slept by me, till the Lord, my gracious Father, who saw the
conflicts of my soul, was pleased to give quietness. Then I was again
strengthened to commit my life, and all things relating thereto, into his
heavenly hands, and got a little sleep towards day.
Fourteenth
of sixth month. - We sought out and visited all the Indians hereabouts that we
could meet with, in number about twenty. They were chiefly in one place, about
a mile from where we lodged. I expressed to them the care I had on my mind for
their good, and told them that true love had made me willing thus to leave my
family to come and see the Indians and speak with them in their houses. Some of
them appeared kind and friendly. After taking leave of them, we went up the
river Susquehanna about three miles, to the house of an Indian called Jacob
January. He had killed his hog, and the women were making store of bread and
preparing to move up the river. Here our pilots had left their canoe when they
came down in the spring, and lying dry it had become leaky. This detained us
some hours, so that we had a good deal of friendly conversation with the
family; and, eating dinner with them, we made them some small presents. Then
putting our baggage into the canoe, some of them pushed slowly up the stream,
and the rest of us rode our horses. We swam them over a creek called
Lahawahamunk, and pitched our tent above it in the evening. In a sense of God's
goodness in helping me in my distress, sustaining me under trials, and
inclining my heart to trust in him, I lay down in an humble, bowed frame of
mind, and had a comfortable night's lodging.
Fifteenth
of sixth month. - We proceeded forward till the afternoon, when, a storm
appearing, we met our canoe at an appointed place and stayed all night, the
rain continuing so heavy that it beat through our tent and wet both us and our
baggage. The next day we found abundance of trees blown down by the storm
yesterday, and had occasion reverently to consider the kind dealings of the
Lord who provided a safe place for us in a valley while this storm continued.
We were much hindered by the trees which had fallen across our path, and in
some swamps our way was so stopped that we got through with extreme difficulty.
I had this day often to consider myself as a sojourner in this world. A belief
in the all-sufficiency of God to support his people in their pilgrimage felt
comfortable to me, and I was industriously employed to get to a state of
perfect resignation.
We
seldom saw our canoe but at appointed places, by reason of the path going off
from the river. This afternoon Job Chilaway, an Indian from Wehaloosing, who
talks good English and is acquainted with several people in and about
Philadelphia, met our people on the river. Understanding where we expected to
lodge, he pushed back about six miles, and came to us after night; and in a
while our own canoe arrived, it being hard work pushing up the stream. Job told
us that an Indian came in haste to their town yesterday and told them that
three warriors from a distance lodged in a town above Wehaloosing a few nights
past, and that these three men were going against the English at Juniata. Job
was going down the river to the province-store at Shamokin. Though I was so far
favored with health as to continue travelling, yet, through the various
difficulties in our journey, and the different way of living from which I had
been used to, I grew sick. The news of these warriors being on their march so
near us, and not knowing whether we might not fall in with them, was a fresh
trial of my faith; and though, through the strength of Divine love, I had
several times been enabled to commit myself to the Divine disposal, I still
found the want of a renewal of my strength, that I might be able to persevere
therein; and my cries for help were put up to the Lord, who, in great mercy, gave
me a resigned heart, in which I found quietness.
Parting
from Job Chilaway on the 17th, we went on and reached Wehaloosing about the
middle of the afternoon. The first Indian that we saw was a woman of a modest
countenance, with a Bible, who spake first to our guide, and then with an
harmonious voice expressed her gladness at seeing us, having before heard of
our coming. By the direction of our guide we sat down on a log while he went to
the town to tell the people we were come. My companion and I, sitting thus
together in a deep inward stillness, the poor woman came and sat near us; and,
great awfulness coming over us, we rejoiced in a sense of God's love manifested
to our poor souls. After a while we heard a conch-shell blow several times, and
then came John Curtis and another Indian man, who kindly invited us into a
house near the town, where we found about sixty people sitting in silence.
After sitting with them a short time I stood up, and in some tenderness of
spirit acquainted them, in a few short sentences, with the nature of my visit,
and that a concern for their good had made me willing to come thus far to see
them; which some of them understanding interpreted to the others, and there
appeared gladness among them. I then showed them my certificate, which was
explained to them; and the Moravian who overtook us on the way, being now here,
bade me welcome. But the Indians knowing that this Moravian and I were of
different religious societies, and as some of their people had encouraged him
to come and stay awhile with them, they were, I believe, concerned that there
might be no jarring or discord in their meetings; and having, I suppose,
conferred together, they acquainted me that the people, at my request, would at
any time come together and hold meetings. They also told me that they expected
the Moravian would speak in their settled meetings, which are commonly held in
the morning and near evening. So finding liberty in my heart to speak to the
Moravian, I told him of the care I felt on my mind for the good of these
people, and my belief that no ill effects would follow if I sometimes spake in
their meetings when love engaged me thereto, without calling them together at
times when they did not meet of course. He expressed his good-will towards my
speaking at any time all that I found in my heart to say.
On
the evening of the 18th I was at their meeting, where pure gospel love was
felt, to the tendering of some of our hearts. The interpreters endeavored to
acquaint the people with what I said, in short sentences, but found some
difficulty, as none of them were quite perfect in the English and Delaware
tongues, so they helped one another, and we labored along, Divine love
attending. Afterwards, feeling my mind covered with the spirit of prayer, I
told the interpreters that I found it in my heart to pray to God, and believed,
if I prayed aright, he would hear me; and I expressed my willingness for them
to omit interpreting; so our meeting ended with a degree of Divine love. Before
the people went out, I observed Papunehang (the man who had been zealous in
laboring for a reformation in that town, being then very tender) speaking to
one of the interpreters, and I was afterwards told that he said in substance as
follows: "I love to feel where words come from."
Nineteenth
of sixth month and first of the week. - This morning the Indian who came with
the Moravian, being also a member of that society, prayed in the meeting, and
then the Moravian spake a short time to the people. In the afternoon, my heart
being filled with a heavenly care for their good, I spake to them awhile by
interpreters; but none of them being perfect in the work, and I feeling the
current of love run strong, told the interpreters that I believed some of the
people would understand me, and so I proceeded without them; and I believe the
Holy Ghost wrought on some hearts to edification where all the words were not
understood. I looked upon it as a time of Divine favor, and my heart was
tendered and truly thankful before the Lord. After I sat down, one of the
interpreters seemed spirited to give the Indians the substance of what I said.
Before
our first meeting this morning, I was led to meditate on the manifold
difficulties of these Indians who, by the permission of the Six Nations, dwell
in these parts. A near sympathy with them was raised in me, and, my heart being
enlarged in the love of Christ, I thought that the affectionate care of a good
man for his only brother in affliction does not exceed what I then felt for
that people. I came to this place through much trouble; and though through the
mercies of God I believed that if I died in the journey it would be well with
me, yet the thoughts of falling into the hands of Indian warriors were, in
times of weakness, afflicting to me; and being of a tender constitution of
body, the thoughts of captivity among them were also grievous; supposing that
as they were strong and hardy they might demand service of me beyond what I
could well bear. But the Lord alone was my keeper, and I believed that if I
went into captivity it would be for some good end. Thus, from time to time, my
mind was centred in resignation, in which I always found quietness. And this
day, though I had the same dangerous wilderness between me and home, I was
inwardly joyful that the Lord had strengthened me to come on this visit, and
had manifested a fatherly care over me in my poor lowly condition, when, in
mine own eyes, I appeared inferior to many among the Indians.
When
the last-mentioned meeting was ended, it being night, Papunehang went to bed;
and hearing him speak with an harmonious voice, I suppose for a minute or two,
I asked the interpreter, who told me that he was expressing his thankfulness to
God for the favors he had received that day, and prayed that he would continue
to favor him with the same, which he had experienced in that meeting. Though
Papunehang had before agreed to receive the Moravian and join with them, he
still appeared kind and loving to us.
I
was at two meetings on the 20th, and silent in them. The following morning, in
meeting, my heart was enlarged in pure love among them, and in short plain
sentences I expressed several things that rested upon me, which one of the
interpreters gave the people pretty readily. The meeting ended in supplication,
and I had cause humbly to acknowledge the loving-kindness of the Lord towards
us; and then I believed that a door remained open for the faithful disciples of
Jesus Christ to labor among these people. And now, feeling my mind at liberty
to return, I took my leave of them in general at the conclusion of what I said
in meeting, and we then prepared to go homeward. But some of their most active
men told us that when we were ready to move the people would choose to come and
shake hands with us. Those who usually came to meeting did so; and from a
secret draught in my mind I went among some who did not usually go to meeting,
and took my leave of them also. The Moravian and his Indian interpreter
appeared respectful to us at parting. This town, Wehaloosing, stands on the
bank of the Susquehanna, and consists, I believe, of about forty houses, mostly
compact together, some about thirty feet long and eighteen wide, - some bigger,
some less. They are built mostly of split plank, one end being set in the
ground, and the other pinned to a plate on which rafters are laid, and then
covered with bark. I understand a great flood last winter overflowed the
greater part of the ground where the town stands, and some were now about
moving their houses to higher ground.
We
expected only two Indians to be of our company, but when we were ready to go we
found many of them were going to Bethlehem with skins and furs, and chose to go
in company with us. So they loaded two canoes in which they desired us to go,
telling us that the waters were so raised with the rains that the horses should
be taken by such as were better acquainted with the fording-places. We,
therefore, with several Indians, went in the canoes, and others went on horses,
there being seven besides ours. We met with the horsemen once on the way by
appointment, and at night we lodged a little below a branch called Tankhannah,
and some of the young men, going out a little before dusk with their guns,
brought in a deer.
Through
diligence we reached Wyoming before night, the 22nd, and understood that the
Indians were mostly gone from this place. We went up a small creek into the
woods with our canoes, and, pitching our tent, carried out our baggage, and
before dark our horses came to us. Next morning, the horses being loaded and
our baggage prepared, we set forward, being in all fourteen, and with diligent
travelling were favored to get near half-way to Fort Allen. The land on this
road from Wyoming to our frontier being mostly poor, and good grass being
scarce, the Indians chose a piece of low ground to lodge on, as the best for
grazing. I had sweat much in travelling, and, being weary, slept soundly. In
the night I perceived that I had taken cold, of which I was favored soon to get
better.
Twenty-fourth
of sixth month. - This day we passed Fort Allen and lodged near it in the
woods. We forded the westerly branch of the Delaware three times, which was a
shorter way than going over the top of the Blue Mountains called the Second
Ridge. In the second time of fording where the river cuts through the mountain,
the waters being rapid and pretty deep, my companion's mare, being a tall,
tractable animal, was sundry times driven back through the river, being laden
with the burdens of some small horses which were thought unable to come through
with their loads. The troubles westward, and the difficulty for Indians to pass
through our frontier, was, I apprehend, one reason why so many came, expecting
that our being in company would prevent the outside inhabitants being
surprised. We reached Bethlehem on the 25th, taking care to keep foremost, and
to acquaint people on and near the road who these Indians were. This we found
very needful, for the frontier inhabitants were often alarmed at the report of
the English being killed by Indians westward. Among our company were some whom
I did not remember to have seen at meeting, and some of these at first were
very reserved; but we being several days together, and behaving in a friendly
manner towards them, and making them suitable return for the services they did
us, they became more free and sociable.
Twenty-sixth
of sixth month. - Having carefully endeavored to settle all affairs with the
Indians relative to our journey, we took leave of them, and I thought they
generally parted from us affectionately. We went forward to Richland and had a
very comfortable meeting among our friends, it being the first day of the week.
Here I parted with my kind friend and companion Benjamin Parvin, and,
accompanied by my friend Samuel Foulk, we rode to John Cadwallader's, from
whence I reached home the next day, and found my family tolerably well. They
and my friends appeared glad to see me return from a journey which they
apprehended would be dangerous; but my mind, while I was out, had been so
employed in striving for perfect resignation, and had so often been confirmed
in a belief, that, whatever the Lord might be pleased to allot for me, it would
work for good, that I was careful lest I should admit any degree of selfishness
in being glad overmuch, and labored to improve by those trials in such a manner
as my gracious Father and Protector designed. Between the English settlements
and Wehaloosing we had only a narrow path, which in many places is much grown
up with bushes, and interrupted by abundance of trees lying across it. These,
together with the mountain swamps and rough stones, make it a difficult road to
travel, and the more so because rattlesnakes abound here, of which we killed
four. People who have never been in such places have but an imperfect idea of
them; and I was not only taught patience, but also made thankful to God, who
thus led about and instructed me, that I might have a quick and lively feeling
of the afflictions of my fellow-creatures, whose situation in life is difficult.
Chapter IX: 1763-1769
Religious Conversation with a Company met to see the Tricks of a Juggler
Account of John Smith's Advice and of the Proceedings of a Committee at the
Yearly Meeting in 1764 - Contemplations on the Nature of True Wisdom - Visit to
the Families of Friends at Mount Holly, Mansfield, and Burlington, and to the
Meetings on the Sea-Coast from Cape May towards Squan - Some Account of Joseph
Nichols and his Followers - On the different State of the First Settlers in
Pennsylvania who depended on their own Labor, compared with those of the
Southern Provinces who kept Negroes-Visit to the Northern Parts of New Jersey
and the Western Parts of Maryland and Pennsylvania; also to the Families of
Friends at Mount Holly and several Parts of Maryland-Further Considerations on
keeping Slaves, and his Concern for having been a Party to the Sale of
One-Thoughts on Friends exercising Offices in Civil Government.
The
latter part of the summer, 1763, there came a man to Mount Holly who had
previously published a printed advertisement that at a certain public-house he
would show many wonderful operations, which were therein enumerated. At the
appointed time he did, by sleight of hand, perform sundry things which appeared
strange to the spectators. Understanding that the show was to be repeated the
next night, and that the people were to meet about sunset, I felt an exercise
on that account. So I went to the public-house in the evening, and told the man
of the house that I had an inclination to spend a part of the evening there;
with which he signified that he was content. Then, sitting down by the door, I
spoke to the people in the fear of the Lord, as they came together, concerning
this show, and labored to convince them that their thus assembling to see these
sleight-of-hand tricks, and bestowing their money to support men who, in that
capacity, were of no use to the world, was contrary to the nature of the
Christian religion. One of the company endeavored to show by arguments the
reasonableness of their proceedings herein; but after considering some texts of
Scripture and calmly debating the matter he gave up the point. After spending
about an hour among them, and feeling my mind easy, I departed.
Twenty-fifth1
of ninth month, 1764. - At our Yearly Meeting at Philadelphia this day, John
Smith, of Marlborough, aged upwards of eighty years, a faithful minister,
though not eloquent, stood up in our meeting of ministers and elders, and,
appearing to be under a great exercise of spirit, informed Friends in substance
as follows: "That he had been a member of our Society upwards of sixty
years, and he well remembered, that, in those early times, Friends were a
plain, lowly-minded people, and that there was much tenderness and contrition
in their meetings. That, at twenty years from that time, the Society increasing
in wealth and in some degree conforming to the fashions of the world, true
humility was less apparent, and their meetings in general were not so lively
and edifying. That at the end of forty years many of them were grown very rich,
and many of the Society made a specious appearance in the world; that wearing
fine costly garments, and using silver and other watches, became customary with
them, their sons, and their daughters. These marks of outward wealth and
greatness appeared on some in our meetings of ministers and elders; and, as
such things became more prevalent, so the powerful overshadowings of the Holy
Ghost were less manifest in the Society. That there had been a continued
increase of such ways of life, even until the present time; and that the
weakness which hath now overspread the Society and the barrenness manifest
among us is matter of much sorrow." He then mentioned the uncertainty of
his attending these meetings in future, expecting his dissolution was near;
and, having tenderly expressed his concern for us, signified that he had seen
in the true light that the Lord would bring back his people from these things,
into which they were thus degenerated, but that his faithful servants must go
through great and heavy exercises.
[Footnote
1: Twentieth?-Ed.]
Twentieth2
of ninth month. - The committee appointed by the Yearly Meeting to visit the
Quarterly and Monthly Meetings gave an account in writing of their proceedings
in that service. They signified that in the course of the visit they had been
apprehensive that some persons holding offices in government inconsistent with
our principles, and others who kept slaves, remaining active members in our
meetings for discipline, had been one means of weakness prevailing in some
places. After this report was read, an exercise revived in my mind which had
attended me for several years, and inward cries to the Lord were raised in me
that the fear of man might not prevent me from doing what he required of me,
and, standing up, I spoke in substance as follows: "I have felt a
tenderness in my mind towards persons in two circumstances mentioned in that
report; namely, towards such active members as keep slaves and such as hold
offices in civil government; and I have desired that Friends, in all their
conduct, may be kindly affectioned one towards another. Many Friends who keep
slaves are under some exercise on that account; and at times think about trying
them with freedom, but find many things in their way. The way of living and the
annual expenses of some of them are such that it seems impracticable for them
to set their slaves free without changing their own way of life. It has been my
lot to be often abroad; and I have observed in some places, at Quarterly and
Yearly Meetings, and at some houses where travelling Friends and their horses
are often entertained, that the yearly expense of individuals therein is very
considerable. And Friends in some places crowding much on persons in these
circumstances for entertainment hath rested as a burden on my mind for some
years past. I now express it in the fear of the Lord, greatly desiring that
Friends here present may duly consider it."
[Footnote
2: Twenty-fifth?-Ed.]
In
the fall of this year, having hired a man to work, I perceived in conversation
with him that he had been a soldier in the late war on this continent; and he
informed me in the evening, in a narrative of his captivity among the Indians,
that he saw two of his fellow-captives tortured to death in a very cruel manner.
This relation affected me with sadness, under which I went to bed; and the next
morning, soon after I awoke, a fresh and living sense of Divine love overspread
my mind, in which I had a renewed prospect of the nature of that wisdom from
above which leads to a right use of all gifts, both spiritual and temporal, and
gives content therein. Under a feeling thereof, I wrote as follows:
"Hath
He who gave me a being attended with many wants unknown to brute creatures
given me a capacity superior to theirs, and shown me that a moderate
application to business is suitable to my present condition, and that this,
attended with his blessing, may supply all my outward wants while they remain
within the bounds he hath fixed, and while no imaginary wants proceeding from
an evil spirit have any place in me? Attend then, O my soul! to this pure
wisdom as thy sure conductor through the manifold dangers of this world.
"Doth
pride lead to vanity? Doth vanity form imaginary wants? Do these wants prompt
men to exert their power in requiring more from others than they would be
willing to perform themselves, were the same required of them? Do these
proceedings beget hard thoughts? Do hard thoughts, when ripe, become malice?
Does malice, when ripe, become revengeful, and in the end inflict terrible
pains on our fellow-creatures and spread desolations in the world?
"Do
mankind, walking in uprightness, delight in each other's happiness? And do
those who are capable of this attainment, by giving way to an evil spirit,
employ their skill and strength to afflict and destroy one another? Remember
then, O my soul! the quietude of those in whom Christ governs, and in all thy
proceedings feel after it.
"Doth
he condescend to bless thee with his presence? To move and influence thee to
action? To dwell and to walk in thee? Remember then thy station as being sacred
to God. Accept of the strength freely offered to thee, and take heed that no
weakness in conforming to unwise, expensive, and hard-hearted customs,
gendering to discord and strife, be given way to. Doth he claim my body as his
temple, and graciously require that I may be sacred to him? O that I may prize
this favor, and that my whole life may be conformable to this character!
Remember, O my soul! that the Prince of Peace is thy Lord that he communicates
his unmixed wisdom to his family, that they, living in perfect simplicity, may
give no just causes of offence to any creature, but that they may walk as He
walked!"
Having
felt an openness in my heart towards visiting families in our own meeting, and
especially in the town of Mount Holly, the place of my abode, I mentioned it at
our Monthly Meeting in the fore part of the winter of 1764, which being agreed
to, and several Friends of our meeting being united in the exercise, we proceeded
therein; and through Divine favor we were helped in the work, so that it
appeared to me as a fresh reviving of godly care among Friends. The latter part
of the same winter I joined my friend William Jones in a visit to Friends'
families in Mansfield, in which labor I had cause to admire the goodness of the
Lord toward us.
My
mind being drawn towards Friends along the seacoast from Cape May to near
Squan, and also to visit some people in those parts, among whom there is no
settled worship, I joined with my beloved friend Benjamin Jones in a visit to
them, Friends' unity therein. We set off the 24th of tenth month, 1765, and had
a prosperous and very satisfactory journey, feeling at times, through the
goodness of the Heavenly Shepherd, the gospel to flow freely towards a poor
people scattered in these places. Soon after our return I joined my friends
John Sleeper and Elizabeth Smith in a visit to Friends' families at Burlington,
there being at this time about fifty families of our Society in that city; and we
had cause humbly to adore our Heavenly Father, who baptized us into a feeling
of the state of the people, and strengthened us to labor in true gospel love
among them.
Having
had a concern at times for several years to pay a religious visit to Friends on
the Eastern Shore of Maryland, and to travel on foot among them, that by so
travelling I might have a more lively feeling of the condition of the oppressed
slaves, set an example of lowliness before the eyes of their masters, and be
more out of the way of temptation to unprofitable converse; and the time
drawing near in which I believed it my duty to lay my concern before our
Monthly Meeting, I perceived, in conversation with my beloved friend John
Sleeper, that he also was under a similar concern to travel on foot in the form
of a servant among them, as he expressed it. This he told me before he knew
aught of my exercise. Being thus drawn the same way, we laid our exercise and
the nature of it before Friends; and, obtaining certificates, we set off the
6th of fifth month, 1766, and were at meetings with Friends at Wilmington, Duck
Creek, Little Creek, and Motherkill. My heart was often tendered under the
Divine influence, and enlarged in love towards the people among whom we
travelled.
From
Motherkill we crossed the country about thirty-five miles to Tuckahoe, in
Maryland, and had a meeting there, and also at Marshy Creek. At the last three
meetings there were a considerable number of the followers of one Joseph
Nichols, a preacher, who, I understand, is not in outward fellowship with any
religious society, but professeth nearly the same principles as those of our
Society, and often travels up and down, appointing meetings which many people
attend. I heard of some who had been irreligious people that were now his
followers, and were become sober, well-behaved men and women. Some
irregularities, I hear, have been among the people at several of his meetings;
but from what I have perceived I believe the man and some of his followers are
honestly disposed, but that skillful fathers are wanting among them.
We
then went to Choptank and Third Haven, and thence to Queen Anne's. The weather
for some days past having been hot and dry, and we having travelled pretty
steadily and having hard labor in meetings, I grew weakly, at which I was for a
time discouraged; but looking over our journey and considering how the Lord had
supported our minds and bodies, so that we had gone forward much faster than I
expected before we came out, I saw that I had been in danger of too strongly
desiring to get quickly through the journey, and that the bodily weakness now
attending me was a kindness; and then, in contrition of spirit, I became very
thankful to my gracious Father for this manifestation of his love, and in
humble submission to his will trust in him was renewed.
In
this part of our journey I had many thoughts on the different circumstances of
Friends who inhabit Pennsylvania and Jersey from those who dwell in Maryland,
Virginia, and Carolina. Pennsylvania and New Jersey were settled by Friends who
were convinced of our principles in England in times of suffering; these,
coming over, bought lands of the natives, and applied to husbandry in a
peaceable way, and many of their children were taught to labor for their
living. Few of these, I believe, settled in any of the southern provinces; but
by the faithful labors of travelling Friends in early times there was
considerable convincement among the inhabitants of these parts. I also
remembered having read of the warlike disposition of many of the first settlers
in those provinces, and of their numerous engagements with the natives in which
much blood was shed even in the infancy of the colonies. Some of the people
inhabiting those places, being grounded in customs contrary to the pure truth,
were affected with the powerful preaching of the Word of Life and joined in
fellowship with our Society, and in so doing they had a great work to go
through. In the history of the reformation from Popery it is observable that
the progress was gradual from age to age. The uprightness of the first
reformers in attending to the light and understanding given to them opened the
way for sincere-hearted people to proceed further afterwards; and thus each one
truly fearing God and laboring in the works of righteousness appointed for him
in his day findeth acceptance with Him. Through the darkness of the times and
the corruption of manners and customs, some upright men may have had little
more for their day's work than to attend to the righteous principle in their minds
as it related to their own conduct in life without pointing out to others the
whole extent of that into which the same principle would lead succeeding ages.
Thus, for instance, among an imperious, warlike people, supported by oppressed
slaves, some of these masters, I suppose, are awakened to feel and to see their
error, and through sincere repentance cease from oppression and become like
fathers to their servants, showing by their example a pattern of humility in
living, and moderation in governing, for the instruction and admonition of
their oppressing neighbors; these, without carrying the reformation further,
have, I believe, found acceptance with the Lord. Such was the beginning; and
those who succeeded them, and who faithfully attended to the nature and spirit
of the reformation, have seen the necessity of proceeding forward, and have not
only to instruct other by their own example in governing well, but have also to
use means to prevent their successors from having so much power to oppress others.
Here
I was renewedly confirmed in my mind that the Lord (whose tender mercies are
over all his works, and whose ear is open to the cries and groans of the
oppressed) is graciously moving in the hearts of people to draw them off from
the desire of wealth and to bring them into such an humble, lowly way of living
that they may see their way clearly to repair to the standard of true
righteousness, and may not only break the yoke of oppression, but may know him
to be their strength and support in times of outward affliction.
We
crossed Chester River, had a meeting there, and also at Cecil and Sassafras. My
bodily weakness, joined with a heavy exercise of mind, was to me an humbling
dispensation, and I had a very lively feeling of the state of the oppressed; yet
I often thought that what I suffered was little compared with the sufferings of
the blessed Jesus and many of his faithful followers; and I may say with
thankfulness that I was made content. From Sassafras we went pretty directly
home, where we found our families well. For several weeks after our return I
had often to look over our journey; and though to me it appeared as a small
service, and that some faithful messengers will yet have more bitter cups to
drink in those southern provinces for Christ's sake than we have had, yet I
found peace in that I had been helped to walk in sincerity according to the
understanding and strength given to me.
Thirteenth
of eleventh month. - With the unity of Friends at our monthly meeting, and in
company with my beloved friend Benjamin Jones, I set out on a visit Friends in
the upper part of this province, having had drawings of love in my heart that
way for a considerable time. We travelled as far as Hardwick, and I had inward
peace in my labors of love among them. Through the humbling dispensations of
Divine Providence my mind hath been further brought into a feeling of the
difficulties of Friends and their servants southwestward; and being often
engaged in spirit on their account I believed it my duty to walk into some parts
of the western shore of Maryland on a religious visit. Having obtained a
certificate from Friends of our Monthly Meeting, I took leave of my family
under the heart-tendering operation of truth, and on the 20th of fourth month,
1767, rode to the ferry opposite to Philadelphia, and thence walked to William
Horne's, at Derby, the same evening. Next day I pursued my journey alone and
reached Concord Week-Day Meeting.
Discouragements
and a weight of distress had at times attended me in this lonesome walk, but
through these afflictions I was mercifully preserved. Sitting down with
Friends, my mind was turned towards the Lord to wait for his holy leadings; and
in infinite love he was pleased to soften my heart into humble contrition, and
renewedly to strengthen me to go forward, so that to me it was a time of
heavenly refreshment in a silent meeting. The next day I came to New Garden
Week-Day Meeting, in which I sat in bowedness of spirit, and being baptized
into a feeling of the state of some present, the Lord gave us a heart-tendering
season; to his name be the praise. Passing on, I was at Nottingham Monthly
Meeting, and at a meeting at Little Britain on first-day; in the afternoon
several Friends came to the house where I lodged and we had a little afternoon meeting,
and through the humbling power of truth I had to admire the lovingkindness of
the Lord manifested to us.
Twenty-sixth
of fourth month. - I crossed the Susquehanna, and coming among people in
outward ease and greatness, supported chiefly on the labor of slaves, my heart
was much affected, and in awful retiredness my mind was gathered inward to the
Lord, humbly desiring that in true resignation I might receive instruction from
him respecting my duty among this people. Though travelling on foot was wearisome
to my body, yet it was agreeable to the state of my mind. Being weakly, I was
covered with sorrow and heaviness on account of the prevailing spirit of this
world by which customs grievous and oppressive are introduced on the one hand,
and pride and wantonness on the other.
In
this lonely walk and state of abasement and humiliation, the condition of the
church in these parts was opened before me, and I may truly say with the
Prophet, "I was bowed down at the hearing of it; I was dismayed at the
seeing of it." Under this exercise I attended the Quarterly Meeting at
Gunpowder, and in bowedness of spirit I had to express with much plainness my
feelings respecting Friends living in fulness on the labors of the poor
oppressed negroes; and that promise of the Most High was now revived, "I
will gather all nations and tongues, and they shall come and see my
glory." Here the sufferings of Christ and his tasting death for every man,
and the travels, sufferings, and martyrdom of the Apostles and primitive
Christians in laboring for the conversion of the Gentiles, were livingly
revived in me, and according to the measure of strength afforded I labored in
some tenderness of spirit, being deeply affected among them. The difference
between the present treatment which these gentiles, the negroes, receive at our
hands, and the labors of the primitive Christians for the conversion of the
Gentiles, were pressed home, and the power of truth came over us, under a
feeling of which my mind was united to a tender-hearted people in these parts.
The meeting concluded in a sense of God's goodness towards his humble,
dependent children.
The
next day was a general meeting for worship, much crowded, in which I was deeply
engaged in inward cries to the Lord for help, that I might stand wholly
resigned, and move only as he might be pleased to lead me. I was mercifully
helped to labor honestly and fervently among them, in which I found inward
peace, and the sincere were comforted. From this place I turned towards Pipe
Creek and the Red Lands, and had several meetings among Friends in those parts.
My heart was often tenderly affected under a sense of the Lord's goodness in
sanctifying my troubles and exercises, turning them to my comfort, and I
believe to the benefit of many others, for I may say with thankfulness that in
this visit it appeared like a tendering visitation in most places.
I
passed on to the Western Quarterly Meeting in Pennsylvania. During the several
days of this meeting I was mercifully preserved in an inward feeling after the
mind of truth, and my public labors tended to my humiliation, with which I was
content. After the Quarterly Meeting for worship ended, I felt drawings to go
to the women's meeting for business, which was very full; here the humility of
Jesus Christ as a pattern for us to walk by was livingly opened before me, and
in treating on it my heart was enlarged, and it was a baptizing time. I was
afterwards at meetings at Concord, Middletown, Providence, and Haddonfield,
whence I returned home and found my family well. A sense of the Lord's merciful
preservation in this my journey excites reverent thankfulness to him.
Second
of ninth month, 1767. - With the unity of Friends, I set off on a visit to
Friends in the upper part of Berks and Philadelphia counties; was at eleven
meetings in about two weeks, and have renewed cause to bow in reverence before
the Lord, who, by the powerful extendings of his humbling goodness, opened my
way among Friends, and I trust made the meetings profitable to us. The
following winter I joined some Friends in a family visit to some part of our
meeting, in which exercise the pure influence of Divine love made our visits
reviving.
Fifth
of fifth month, 1768. - I left home under the humbling hand of the Lord, with a
certificate to visit some meetings in Maryland, and to proceed without a horse
seemed clearest to me. I was at the Quarterly Meetings at Philadelphia and
Concord, whence I proceeded to Chester River, and, crossing the bay, was at the
Yearly Meeting at West River; I then returned to Chester River, and, taking a
few meetings in my way, proceeded home. It was a journey of much inward
waiting, and as my eye was to the Lord, way was several times opened to my humbling
admiration when things appeared very difficult. On my return I felt a very
comfortable relief of mind, having through Divine help labored in much
plainness, both with Friends selected and in the more public meetings, so that
I trust the pure witness in many minds was reached.
Eleventh
of sixth month, 1769. - There have been sundry cases of late years within the
limits of our Monthly Meeting, respecting the exercising of pure righteousness
towards the negroes, in which I have lived under a labor of heart that equity
might be steadily preserved. On this account I have had some close exercises
among Friends, in which, I may thankfully say, I find peace. And as my
meditations have been on universal love, my own conduct in time past became of
late very grievous to me. As persons setting negroes free in our province are
bound by law to maintain them in case they have need of relief, some in the
time of my youth who scrupled to keep slaves for term of life were wont to
detain their young negroes in their service without wages till they were thirty
years of age. With this custom I so far agreed that being joined with another
Friend in executing the will of a deceased Friend, I once sold a negro lad till
he might attain the age of thirty years, and applied the money to the use of
the estate.
With
abasement of heart I may now say that sometimes as I have sat in a meeting with
my heart exercised towards that awful Being who respecteth not persons nor
colors, and have thought upon this lad, I have felt that all was not clear in
my mind respecting him; and as I have attended to this exercise and fervently
sought the Lord, it hath appeared to me that I should make some restitution;
but in what way I saw not till lately, when being under some concern that I
might be resigned to go on a visit to some part of the West Indies, and under
close engagement of spirit seeking to the Lord for counsel herein, the
aforesaid transaction came heavily upon me, and my mind for a time was covered
with darkness and sorrow. Under this sore affliction my heart was softened to
receive instruction, and I now first perceived that as I had been one of the
two executors who had sold this lad for nine years longer than is common for
our own children to serve, so I should now offer part of my substance to redeem
the last half of the nine years; but as the time was not yet come, I executed a
bond, binding myself and my executors to pay to the man to whom he was sold
what to candid men might appear equitable for the last four and a half years of
his time, in case the said youth should be living, and in a condition likely to
provide comfortably for himself.
Ninth
of tenth month. - My heart hath often been deeply afflicted under a feeling
that the standard of pure righteousness is not lifted up to the people by us,
as a society, in that clearness which it might have been, had we been as
faithful as we ought to be to the teachings of Christ. And as my mind hath been
inward to the Lord, the purity of Christ's government hath been made clear to
my understanding, and I have believed, in the opening of universal love, that
where a people who are convinced of the truth of the inward teachings of Christ
are active in putting laws in execution which are not consistent with pure
wisdom, it hath a necessary tendency to bring dimness over their minds. My
heart having been thus exercised for several years with a tender sympathy
towards my fellow-members, I have within a few months past expressed my concern
on this subject in several meetings for discipline.
Chapter X: 1769-1770
Bodily Indisposition-Exercise of his Mind for the Good of the People in
the West Indies-Communicates to Friends his Concern to visit some of those
Islands-Preparations to embark-Considerations on the Trade to the West
Indies-Release from his Concern and return Home-Religious Engagements Sickness,
and Exercise of his Mind therein.
Twelfth
of third month, 1769. - Having for some years past dieted myself on account of
illness and weakness of body, and not having ability to travel by land as
heretofore, I was at times favored to look with awfulness towards the Lord,
before whom are all my ways, who alone hath the power of life and death, and to
feel thankfulness raised in me for this fatherly chastisement, believing that
if I was truly humbled under it all would work for good. While under this
bodily weakness, my mind was at times exercised for my fellow-creatures in the
West Indies, and I grew jealous over myself lest the disagreeableness of the
prospect should hinder me from obediently attending thereto; for, though I knew
not that the Lord required me to go there, yet I believed that resignation was
now called for in that respect. Feeling a danger of not being wholly devoted to
him, I was frequently engaged to watch unto prayer that I might be preserved;
and upwards of a year having passed, as I one day walked in a solitary wood, my
mind being covered with awfulness, cries were raised in me to my merciful
Father, that he would graciously keep me in faithfulness; and it then settled
on my mind, as a duty, to open my condition to Friends at our Monthly Meeting,
which I did soon after, as follows:
"An
exercise hath attended me for some time past, and of late hath been more
weighty upon me, which is, that I believe it is required of me to be resigned
to go on a visit to some parts of the West Indies." In the Quarterly and
General Spring Meetings I found no clearness to express anything further than
that I believed resignation herein was required of me. Having obtained
certificates from all the said meetings, I felt like a sojourner at my outward
habitation, and kept free from worldly encumbrances, and I was often bowed in
spirit before the Lord, with inward breathings to him that I might be rightly
directed. I may here note that the circumstance before related of my having,
when young, joined with another executor in selling a negro lad till he might
attain the age of thirty years, was now the cause of much sorrow to me; and,
after having settled matters relating to this youth, I provided a sea-store and
bed, and things for the voyage. Hearing of a vessel likely to sail from
Philadelphia for Barbadoes, I spake with one of the owners at Burlington, and
soon after went to Philadelphia on purpose to speak to him again. He told me
there was a Friend in town who was part owner of the said vessel. I felt no
inclination to speak with the latter, but returned home. Awhile after I took
leave of my family, and, going to Philadelphia, had some weighty conversation
with the first-mentioned owner, and showed him a writing, as follows:
"On
the 25th of eleventh month, 1769, as an exercise with respect to a visit to
Barbadoes hath been weighty on my mind, I may express some of the trials which
have attended me, under which I have at times rejoiced that I have felt my own
self-will subjected.
"Some
years ago I retailed rum, sugar, and molasses, the fruits of the labor of
slaves, but had not then much concern about them save only that the rum might
be used in moderation; nor was this concern so weightily attended to as I now
believe it ought to have been. Having of late years been further informed
respecting the oppressions too generally exercised in these islands, and
thinking often on the dangers there are in connections of interest and
fellowship with the works of darkness (Eph. v. II), I have felt an increasing
concern to be wholly given up to the leadings of the Holy Spirit, and it hath
seemed right that my small gain from this branch of trade should be applied in
promoting righteousness on the earth. This was the first motion towards a visit
to Barbadoes. I believed also that part of my outward substance should be
applied in paying my passage, if I went, and providing things in a lowly way
for my subsistence; but when the time drew near in which I believed it required
of me to be in readiness, a difficulty arose which hath been a continual trial
for some months past, under which I have, with abasement of mind from day to
day, sought the Lord for instruction, having often had a feeling of the
condition of one formerly, who bewailed himself because the Lord hid his face
from him. During these exercises my heart hath often been contrite, and I have
had a tender feeling of the temptations of my fellow-creatures, laboring under
expensive customs not agreeable to the simplicity that 'there is in Christ' (2
Cor. ii. 3), and sometimes in the renewings of gospel love I have been helped
to minister to others.
"That
which hath so closely engaged my mind, in seeking to the Lord for instruction,
is, whether, after the full information I have had of the oppression which the
slaves lie under who raise the West India produce, which I have gained by
reading a caution and warning to Great Britain and her colonies, written by
Anthony Benezet, it is right for me to take passage in a vessel employed in the
West India trade.
"To
trade freely with oppressors without laboring to dissuade them from such unkind
treatment, and to seek for gain by such traffic, tends, I believe, to make them
more easy respecting their conduct than they would be if the cause of universal
righteousness was humbly and firmly attended to by those in general with whom
they have commerce; and that complaint of the Lord by his prophet, "They
have strengthened the hands of the wicked," hath very often revived in my
mind. I may here add some circumstances which occurred to me before I had any
prospect of a visit there. David longed for some water in a well beyond an army
of Philistines who were at war with Israel, and some of his men, to please him,
ventured their lives in passing through this army, and brought that water.
"It
doth not appear that the Israelites were then scarce of water, but rather that
David gave way to delicacy of taste; and having reflected on the danger to
which these men had been exposed, he considered this water as their blood, and
his heart smote him that he could not drink it, but he poured it out to the
Lord. The oppression of the slaves which I have seen in several journeys
southward on this continent, and the report of their treatment in the West
Indies, have deeply affected me, and a care to live in the spirit of peace and
minister no just cause of offence to my fellow-creatures having from time to
time livingly revived in my mind, I have for some years past declined to
gratify my palate with those sugars.
"I
do not censure my brethren in these things, but I believe the Father of
Mercies, to whom all mankind by creation are equally related, hath heard the
groans of this oppressed people and that he is preparing some to have a tender
feeling of their condition. Trading in or the frequent use of any produce known
to be raised by the labor of those who are under such lamentable oppression
hath appeared to be a subject which may hereafter require the more serious
consideration of the humble followers of Christ, the Prince of Peace.
"After
long and mournful exercise I am now free to mention how things have opened in
my mind, with desires that if it may please the Lord further to open his will
to any of his children in this matter they may faithfully follow him in such further
manifestation.
"The
number of those who decline the use of West India produce, on account of the
hard usage of the slaves who raise it, appears small, even among people truly
pious; and the labors in Christian love on that subject of those who do are not
very extensive. Were the trade from this continent to the West Indies to be
stopped at once, I believe many there would suffer for want of bread. Did we on
this continent and the inhabitants of the West Indies generally dwell in pure
righteousness, I believe a small trade between us might be right. Under these
considerations, when the thoughts of wholly declining the use of
trading-vessels and of trying to hire a vessel to go under ballast have arisen
in my mind, I have believed that the labors in gospel love hitherto bestowed in
the cause of universal righteousness have not reached that height. If the trade
to the West Indies were no more than was consistent with pure wisdom, I believe
the passage-money would for good reasons be higher than it is now; and
therefore, under deep exercise of mind, I have believed that I should not take
advantage of this great trade and small passage money, but, as a testimony in
favor of less trading, should pay more than is common for others to pay if I go
at this time."
The
first-mentioned owner, having read the paper, went with me to the other owner,
who also read over the paper, and we had some solid conversation, under which I
felt myself bowed in reverence before the Most High. At length one of them
asked me if I would go and see the vessel. But not having clearness in my mind
to go, I went to my lodging and retired in private under great exercise of
mind; and my tears were poured out before the Lord with inward cries that he
would graciously help me under these trials. I believe my mind was resigned,
but I did not feel clearness to proceed; and my own weakness and the necessity
of Divine instruction were impressed upon me.
I
was for a time as one who knew not what to do and was tossed as in a tempest;
under which affliction the doctrine of Christ, "Take no thought for the
morrow," arose livingly before me, and I was favored to get into a good
degree of stillness. Having been near two days in town, I believed my obedience
to my Heavenly Father consisted in returning homeward; I therefore went over
among Friends on the Jersey shore and tarried till the morning on which the
vessel was appointed to sail. As I lay in bed the latter part of that night my
mind was comforted, and I felt what I esteemed a fresh confirmation that it was
the Lord's will that I should pass through some further exercises near home; so
I went thither, and still felt like a sojourner with my family. In the fresh
spring of pure love I had some labors in a private way among Friends on a
subject relating to truth's testimony, under which I had frequently been
exercised in heart for some years. I remember, as I walked on the road under
this exercise, that passage in Ezekiel came fresh upon me, "Whithersoever
their faces were turned thither they went." And I was graciously helped to
discharge my duty in the fear and dread of the Almighty.
In
the course of a few weeks it pleased the Lord to visit me with a pleurisy; and
after I had lain a few days and felt the disorder very grievous, I was
thoughtful how it might end. I had of late, through various exercises, been
much weaned from the pleasant things of this life; and I now thought if it were
the Lord's will to put an end to my labors and graciously to receive me into
the arms of his mercy, death would be acceptable to me; but if it were his will
further to refine me under affliction, and to make me in any degree useful in
his church, I desired not to die. I may with thankfulness say that in this case
I felt resignedness wrought in me and had no inclination to send for a doctor,
believing, if it were the Lord's will through outward means to raise me up,
some sympathizing Friends would be sent to minister to me; which accordingly
was the case. But though I was carefully attended, yet the disorder was at
times so heavy that I had no expectation of recovery. One night in particular
my bodily distress was great; my feet grew cold, and the cold increased up my
legs towards my body; at that time I had no inclination to ask my nurse to
apply anything warm to my feet, expecting my end was near. After I had lain
near ten hours in this condition, I closed my eyes, thinking whether I might
now be delivered out of the body; but in these awful moments my mind was
livingly opened to behold the church; and strong engagements were begotten in
me for the everlasting well-being of my fellow-creatures. I felt in the spring
of pure love that I might remain some time longer in the body, to fill up
according to my measure that which remains of the afflictions of Christ, and to
labor for the good of the church; after which I requested my nurse to apply
warmth to my feet, and I revived. The next night, feeling a weighty exercise of
spirit and having a solid friend sitting up with me, I requested him to write
what I said, which he did as follows:
"Fourth
day of the first month, 1770, about five in the morning. - I have seen in the
Light of the Lord that the day is approaching when the man that is most wise in
human policy shall be the greatest fool; and the arm that is mighty to support
injustice shall be broken to pieces; the enemies of righteousness shall make a
terrible rattle, and shall mightily torment one another; for He that is
omnipotent is rising up to judgment, and will plead the cause of the oppressed;
and He commanded me to open the vision."
Near
a week after this, feeling my mind livingly opened, I sent for a neighbor, who,
at my request, wrote as follows:
"The
place of prayer is a precious habitation; for I now saw that the prayers of the
saints were precious incense; and a trumpet was given to me that I might sound
forth this language; that the children might hear it and be invited together to
this precious habitation, where the prayers of the saints, as sweet incense,
arise before the throne of God and the Lamb. I saw this habitation to be safe.
- to be inwardly quiet when there were great stirrings and commotions in the
world.
"Prayer,
at this day, in pure resignation, is a precious place: the trumpet is sounded;
the call goes forth to the church that she gather to the place of pure inward
prayer; and her habitation is safe."
The
first-mentioned owner, having read the paper, went with me to the other owner,
who also read over the paper, and we had some solid conversation, under which I
felt myself bowed in reverence before the Most High. At length one of them
asked me if I would go and see the vessel. But not having clearness in my mind
to go, I went to my lodging and retired in private under great exercise of
mind; and my tears were poured out before the Lord with inward cries that he
would graciously help me under these trials. I believe my mind was resigned,
but I did not feel clearness to proceed; and my own weakness and the necessity
of Divine instruction were impressed upon me.
I
was for a time as one who knew not what to do and was tossed as in a tempest;
under which affliction the doctrine of Christ, "Take no thought for the
morrow," arose livingly before me, and I was favored to get into a good
degree of stillness. Having been near two days in town, I believed my obedience
to my Heavenly Father consisted in returning homeward; I therefore went over
among Friends on the Jersey shore and tarried till the morning on which the
vessel was appointed to sail. As I lay in bed the latter part of that night my
mind was comforted, and I felt what I esteemed a fresh confirmation that it was
the Lord's will that I should pass through some further exercises near home; so
I went thither, and still felt like a sojourner with my family. In the fresh
spring of pure love I had some labors in a private way among Friends on a
subject relating to truth's testimony, under which I had frequently been
exercised in heart for some years. I remember, as I walked on the road under
this exercise, that passage in Ezekiel came fresh upon me, "Whithersoever
their faces were turned thither they went." And I was graciously helped to
discharge my duty in the fear and dread of the Almighty.
In
the course of a few weeks it pleased the Lord to visit me with a pleurisy; and
after I had lain a few days and felt the disorder very grievous, I was
thoughtful how it might end. I had of late, through various exercises, been
much weaned from the pleasant things of this life; and I now thought if it were
the Lord's will to put an end to my labors and graciously to receive me into
the arms of his mercy, death would be acceptable to me; but if it were his will
further to refine me under affliction, and to make me in any degree useful in
his church, I desired not to die. I may with thankfulness say that in this case
I felt resignedness wrought in me and had no inclination to send for a doctor,
believing, if it were the Lord's will through outward means to raise me up,
some sympathizing Friends would be sent to minister to me; which accordingly was
the case. But though I was carefully attended, yet the disorder was at times so
heavy that I had no expectation of recovery. One night in particular my bodily
distress was great; my feet grew cold, and the cold increased up my legs
towards my body; at that time I had no inclination to ask my nurse to apply
anything warm to my feet, expecting my end was near. After I had lain near ten
hours in this condition, I closed my eyes, thinking whether I might now be
delivered out of the body; but in these awful moments my mind was livingly
opened to behold the church; and strong engagements were begotten in me for the
everlasting well-being of my fellow-creatures. I felt in the spring of pure
love that I might remain some time longer in the body, to fill up according to
my measure that which remains of the afflictions of Christ, and to labor for
the good of the church; after which I requested my nurse to apply warmth to my
feet, and I revived. The next night, feeling a weighty exercise of spirit and
having a solid friend sitting up with me, I requested him to write what I said,
which he did as follows:
"Fourth
day of the first month, 1770, about five in the morning. - I have seen in the
Light of the Lord that the day is approaching when the man that is most wise in
human policy shall be the greatest fool; and the arm that is mighty to support
injustice shall be broken to pieces; the enemies of righteousness shall make a
terrible rattle, and shall mightily torment one another; for He that is
omnipotent is rising up to judgment, and will plead the cause of the oppressed;
and He commanded me to open the vision."
Near
a week after this, feeling my mind livingly opened, I sent for a neighbor, who,
at my request, wrote as follows:
"The
place of prayer is a precious habitation; for I now saw that the prayers of the
saints were precious incense; and a trumpet was given to me that I might sound
forth this language; that the children might hear it and be invited together to
this precious habitation, where the prayers of the saints, as sweet incense,
arise before the throne of God and the Lamb. I saw this habitation to be safe.
- to be inwardly quiet when there were great stirrings and commotions in the
world.
"Prayer,
at this day, in pure resignation, is a precious place: the trumpet is sounded;
the call goes forth to the church that she gather to the place of pure inward
prayer; and her habitation is safe."
Chapter XI: 1772
Embarks at Chester, with Samuel Emlen, in a Ship bound for
London-Exercise of Mind respecting the Hardships of the Sailors-Considerations
on the Dangers of training Youth to a Seafaring Life-Thoughts during a Storm at
Sea-Arrival in London.
Having
been some time under a religious concern to prepare for crossing the seas, in
order to visit Friends in the northern parts of England, and more particularly
in Yorkshire, after consideration I thought it expedient to inform Friends of
it at our Monthly Meeting at Burlington, who, having unity with me therein,
gave me a certificate. I afterwards communicated the same to our Quarterly
Meeting, and they likewise certified their concurrence. Some time after, at the
General Spring Meeting of ministers and elders, I thought it my duty to
acquaint them with the religious exercise which attended my mind; and they
likewise signified their unity therewith by a certificate, dated the 24th of
third month, 1772, directed to Friends in Great Britain.
In
the fourth month following I thought the time was come for me to make some
inquiry for a suitable conveyance; and as my concern was principally towards
the northern parts of England, it seemed most proper to go in a vessel bound to
Liverpool or Whitehaven. While I was at Philadelphia deliberating on this
subject I was informed that my beloved friend Samuel Emlen, junior, intended to
go to London, and had taken a passage for himself in the cabin of the ship
called the Mary and Elizabeth, of which James Sparks was master, and John Head,
of the city of Philadelphia, one of the owners; and feeling a draught in my
mind towards the steerage of the same ship, I went first and opened to Samuel
the feeling I had concerning it.
My
beloved friend wept when I spake to him, and appeared glad that I had thoughts
of going in the vessel with him, though my prospect was toward the steerage:
and he offering to go with me, we went on board, first into the cabin, - a
commodious room, - and then into the steerage, where we sat down on a chest,
the sailors being busy about us. The owner of the ship also came and sat down
with us. My mind was turned towards Christ, the Heavenly Counsellor, and
feeling at this time my own will subjected, my heart was contrite before him. A
motion was made by the owner to go and sit in the cabin, as a place more
retired; but I felt easy to leave the ship, and making no agreement as to a
passage in her, told the owner if I took a passage in the ship I believed it
would be in the steerage; but did not say much as to my exercise in that case.
After
I went to my lodgings, and the case was a little known in town, a Friend laid
before me the great inconvenience attending a passage in the steerage, which
for a time appeared very discouraging to me.
I
soon after went to bed, and my mind was under a deep exercise before the Lord,
whose helping hand was manifested to me as I slept that night, and his love
strengthened my heart. In the morning I went with two Friends on board the
vessel again, and after a short time spent therein, I went with Samuel Emlen to
the house of the owner, to whom, in the hearing of Samuel only, I opened my
exercise in relation to a scruple I felt with regard to a passage in the cabin,
in substance as follows:
"That
on the outside of that part of the ship where the cabin was I observed sundry
sorts of carved work and imagery; that in the cabin I observed some superfluity
of workmanship of several sorts; and that according to the ways of men's
reckoning, the sum of money to be paid for a passage in that apartment has some
relation to the expense of furnishing it to please the minds of such as give
way to a conformity to this world; and that in this, as in other cases, the
moneys received from the passengers are calculated to defray the cost of these
superfluities, as well as the other expenses of their passage. I therefore felt
a scruple with regard to paying my money to be applied to such purposes."
As
my mind was now opened, I told the owner that I had, at several times, in my
travels, seen great oppressions on this continent, at which my heart had been
much affected and brought into a feeling of the state of the sufferers; and
having many times been engaged in the fear and love of God to labor with those
under whom the oppressed have been borne down and afflicted, I have often
perceived that with a view to get riches and to provide estates for children,
that they may live conformably to the customs and honors of this world, many
are entangled in the spirit of oppression, and the exercise of my soul had been
such that I could not find peace in joining in anything which I saw was against
that wisdom which is pure.
After
this I agreed for a passage in the steerage; and hearing that Joseph White had
desired to see me, I went to his house, and the next day home, where I tarried
two nights. Early the next morning I parted with my family under a sense of the
humbling hand of God upon me, and, going to Philadelphia, had an opportunity
with several of my beloved friends, who appeared to be concerned for me on
account of the unpleasant situation of that part of the vessel in which I was
likely to lodge. In these opportunities my mind, through the mercies of the
Lord, was kept low in an inward waiting for his help; and Friends having
expressed their desire that I might have a more convenient place than the
steerage, did not urge it, but appeared disposed to leave me to the Lord.
Having
stayed two nights at Philadelphia, I went the next day to Derby Monthly
Meeting, where through the strength of Divine love my heart was enlarged
towards the youth there present, under which I was helped to labor in some
tenderness of spirit. I lodged at William Horn's and afterwards went to
Chester, where I met with Samuel Emlen, and we went on board 1st of fifth
month, 1772. As I sat alone on the deck I felt a satisfactory evidence that my
proceedings were not in my own will, but under the power of the cross of
Christ.
Seventh
of fifth month. - We have had rough weather mostly since I came on board, and
the passengers, James Reynolds, John Till Adams, Sarah Logan and her hired
maid, and John Bispham, all seasick at times; from which sickness, through the
tender mercies of my Heavenly Father, I have been preserved, my afflictions now
being of another kind. There appeared an openness in the minds of the master of
the ship and in the cabin passengers towards me. We are often together on the
deck, and sometimes in the cabin. My mind, through the merciful help of the
Lord, hath been preserved in a good degree watchful and quiet, for which I have
great cause to be thankful.
As
my lodging in the steerage, now near a week, hath afforded me sundry
opportunities of seeing, hearing, and feeling with respect to the life and
spirit of many poor sailors, an exercise of soul hath attended me in regard to
placing our children and youth where they may be likely to be exampled and
instructed in the pure fear of the Lord.
Being
much among the seamen I have, from a motion of love taken sundry opportunities
with one of them at a time, and have in free conversation labored to turn their
minds toward the fear of the Lord. This day we had a meeting in the cabin,
where my heart was contrite under a feeling of Divine love.
I
believe a communication with different parts of the world by sea is at times
consistent with the will of our Heavenly Father, and to educate some youth in
the practice of sailing, I believe may be right; but how lamentable is the
present corruption of the world! How impure are the channels through which
trade is conducted! How great is the danger to which poor lads are exposed when
placed on shipboard to learn the art of sailing! Five lads training up for the
seas were on board this ship. Two of them were brought up in our Society, and
the other, by name James Naylor, is a member, to whose father James Naylor,
mentioned in Sewel's history, appears to have been uncle. I often feel a
tenderness of heart towards these poor lads, and at times look at them as
though they were my children according to the flesh.
O
that all may take heed and beware of covetousness! O that all may learn of
Christ, who was meek and lowly of heart. Then in faithfully following him he
will teach us to be content with food and raiment without respect to the
customs or honors of this world. Men thus redeemed will feel a tender concern
for their fellow-creatures, and a desire that those in the lowest stations may
be assisted and encouraged, and where owners of ships attain to the perfect law
of liberty and are doers of the Word, these will be blessed in their deeds.
A
ship at sea commonly sails all night, and the seamen take their watches four
hours at a time. Rising to work in the night, it is not commonly pleasant in
any case, but in dark rainy nights it is very disagreeable, even though each
man were furnished with all conveniences. If, after having been on deck several
hours in the night, they come down into the steerage soaking wet, and are so
closely stowed that proper convenience for change of garments is not easily
come at, but for want of proper room their wet garments are thrown in heaps,
and sometimes, through much crowding, are trodden under foot in going to their
lodgings and getting out of them, and it is difficult at times for each to find
his own. Here are trials for the poor sailors.
Now,
as I have been with them in my lodge, my heart hath often yearned for them, and
tender desires have been raised in me that all owners and masters of vessels
may dwell in the love of God and therein act uprightly, and by seeking less for
gain and looking carefully to their ways they may earnestly labor to remove all
cause of provocation from the poor seamen, so that they may neither fret nor
use excess of strong drink; for, indeed, the poor creatures, in the wet and
cold, seem to apply at times to strong drink to supply the want of other
convenience. Great reformation is wanting in the world, and the necessity of it
among those who do business on great waters hath at this time been abundantly
opened before me.
Eighth
of fifth month. - This morning the clouds gathered, the wind blew strong from
the southeast, and before noon so increased that sailing appeared dangerous.
The seamen then bound up some of their sails and took down others, and the
storm increasing they put the dead-lights, so called, into the cabin windows
and lighted a lamp as at night. The wind now blew vehemently, and the sea
wrought to that degree that an awful seriousness prevailed in the cabin, in
which I spent, I believe, about seventeen hours, for the cabin passengers had
given me frequent invitations, and I thought the poor wet toiling seamen had
need of all the room in the crowded steerage. They now ceased from sailing and
put the vessel in the posture called lying to.
My
mind during this tempest, through the gracious assistance of the Lord, was
preserved in a good degree of resignation; and at times I expressed a few words
in his love to my shipmates in regard to the all-sufficiency of Him who formed
the great deep, and whose care is so extensive that a sparrow falls not without
his notice; and thus in a tender frame of mind I spoke to them of the necessity
of our yielding in true obedience to the instructions of our Heavenly Father, who
sometimes through adversities intendeth our refinement.
About
eleven at night I went out on the deck. The sea wrought exceedingly, and the
high, foaming waves round about had in some sort the appearance of fire, but
did not give much if any light. The sailor at the helm said he lately saw a
corposant at the head of the mast. I observed that the master of the ship
ordered the carpenter to keep on the deck; and, though he said little, I
apprehended his care was that the carpenter with his axe might be in readiness
in case of any emergency. Soon after this the vehemency of the wind abated, and
before morning they again put the ship under sail.
Tenth
of fifth month. - It being the first day of the week and fine weather, we had a
meeting in the cabin, at which most of the seamen were present; this meeting
was to me a strengthening time. 13th. - As I continue to lodge in the steerage
I feel an openness this morning to express something further of the state of my
mind in respect to poor lads bound apprentice to learn the art of sailing. As I
believe sailing is of use in the world, a labor of soul attends me that the
pure counsel of truth may be humbly waited for in this case by all concerned in
the business of the seas. A pious father whose mind is exercised for the
everlasting welfare of his child may not with a peaceable mind place him out to
an employment among a people whose common course of life is manifestly corrupt
and profane. Great is the present defect among seafaring men in regard to
virtue and piety; and, by reason of an abundant traffic and many ships being
used for war, so many people are employed on the sea that the subject of
placing lads to this employment appears very weighty.
When
I remember the saying of the Most High through his prophet, "This people
have I formed for myself; they shall show forth my praise," and think of
placing children among such to learn the practice of sailing, the consistency
of it with a pious education seems to me like that mentioned by the prophet,
"There is no answer from God."
Profane
examples are very corrupting and very forcible. And as my mind day after day
and night after night hath been affected with a sympathizing tenderness towards
poor children who are put to the employment of sailors, I have sometimes had
weighty conversation with the sailors in the steerage, who were mostly
respectful to me and became more so the longer I was with them. They mostly
appeared to take kindly what I said to them; but their minds were so deeply
impressed with the almost universal depravity among sailors that the poor
creatures in their answers to me have revived in my remembrance that of the
degenerate Jews a little before the captivity, as repeated by Jeremiah the
prophet, "There is no hope."
Now
under this exercise a sense of the desire of outward gain prevailing among us
felt grievous; and a strong call to the professed followers of Christ was
raised in me that all may take heed lest, through loving this present world,
they be found in a continued neglect of duty with respect to a faithful labor
for reformation.
To
silence every motion proceeding from the love of money and humbly to wait upon
God to know his will concerning us have appeared necessary. He alone is able to
strengthen us to dig deep, to remove all which lies between us and the safe
foundation, and so to direct us in our outward employments that pure universal
love may shine forth in our proceedings. Desires arising from the spirit of
truth are pure desires; and when a mind divinely opened towards a young
generation is made sensible of corrupting examples powerfully working and
extensively spreading among them, how moving is the prospect! In a world of
dangers and difficulties, like a desolate, thorny wilderness, how precious, how
comfortable, how safe, are the leadings of Christ the good Shepherd, who said,
"I know my sheep, and am known of mine!"
Sixteenth
of sixth^* month. - Wind for several days past often high, what the sailors
call squally, with a rough sea and frequent rains. This last night has been a
very trying one to the poor seamen, the water the most part of the night
running over the main-deck, and sometimes breaking waves came on the
quarter-deck. The latter part of the night, as I lay in bed, my mind was
humbled under the power of Divine love; and resignedness to the great Creator
of the earth and the seas was renewedly wrought in me, and his fatherly care
over his children felt precious to my soul. I was now desirous to embrace every
opportunity of being inwardly acquainted with the hardships and difficulties of
my fellow-creatures, and to labor in his love for the spreading of pure
righteousness on the earth. Opportunities were frequent of hearing conversation
among the sailors respecting the voyages of Africa and the manner of bringing
the deeply oppressed slaves into our islands. They are frequently brought on
board the vessels in chains and fetters, with hearts loaded with grief under
the apprehension of miserable slavery; so that my mind was frequently engaged
to meditate on these things.
[Footnote
*: [Fifth?-Ed.]]
Seventeenth
of fifth month and first of the week. - We had a meeting in the cabin, to which
the seamen generally came. My spirit was contrite before the Lord, whose love
at this time affected my heart. In the afternoon I felt a tender sympathy of
soul with my poor wife and family left behind, in which state my heart was
enlarged in desires that they may walk in that humble obedience wherein the
everlasting Father may be their guide and support through all their
difficulties in this world; and a sense of that gracious assistance, through
which my mind hath been strengthened to take up the cross and leave them to
travel in the love of truth, hath begotten thankfulness in my heart to our
great Helper.
Twenty-fourth
of fifth month. - A clear, pleasant morning. As I sat on deck I felt a reviving
in my nature, which had been weakened through much rainy weather and high winds
and being shut up in a close, unhealthy air. Several nights of late I have felt
my breathing difficult; and a little after the rising of the second watch,
which is about midnight, I have got up and stood near an hour with my face near
the hatchway, to get the fresh air at the small vacancy under the hatch door, which
is commonly shut down, partly to keep out rain and sometimes to keep the
breaking waves from dashing into the steerage. I may with thankfulness to the
Father of Mercies acknowledge that in my present weak state my mind hath been
supported to bear this affliction with patience; and I have looked at the
present dispensation as a kindness from the great Father of mankind, who, in
this my floating pilgrimage, is in some degree bringing me to feel what many
thousands of my fellow-creatures often suffer in a greater degree.
My
appetite failing, the trial hath been the heavier; and I have felt tender
breathings in my soul after God, the fountain of comfort, whose inward help
hath supplied at times the want of outward convenience; and strong desires have
attended me that his family, who are acquainted with the movings of his Holy
Spirit, may be so redeemed from the love of money and from that spirit in which
men seek honor one of another, that in all, business, by sea or land, they may
constantly keep in view the coming of his kingdom on earth as it is in Heaven,
and, by faithfully following this safe guide, may show forth examples tending
to lead out of that under which the creation groans. This day we had a meeting
in the cabin, in which I was favored in some degree to experience the
fulfilling of that saying of the prophet, "The Lord hath a strength to the
poor, a strength to the needy in their distress"; for which my heart is
bowed in thankfulness before him.
Twenty-eighth
of fifth month. - Wet weather of late and small winds, inclining to calms. Our
seamen cast a lead, I suppose about one hundred fathoms, but found no bottom.
Foggy weather this morning. Through the kindness of the great Preserver of men
my mind remains quiet; and a degree of exercise from day to day attends me,
that the pure peaceable government of Christ may spread and prevail among
mankind.
The
leading of a young generation in that pure way in which the wisdom of this
world hath no place, where parents and tutors, humbly waiting for the heavenly
Counsellor, may example them in the truth as it is in Jesus, hath for several
days been the exercise of my mind. O, how safe, how quiet, is that state where
the soul stands in pure obedience to the voice of Christ and a watchful care is
maintained not to follow the voice of the stranger! Here Christ is felt to be
our Shepherd, and under his leading people are brought to a stability; and
where he doth not lead forward, we are bound in the bonds of pure love to stand
still and wait upon him.
In
the love of money and in the wisdom of this world, business is proposed, then
the urgency of affairs push forward, and the mind cannot in this state discern
the good and perfect will of God concerning us. The love of God is manifested
in graciously calling us to come out of that which stands in confusion; but if
we bow not in the name of Jesus, if we give not up those prospects of gain
which in the wisdom of this world are open before us, but say in our hearts,
"I must needs go on; and in going on I hope to keep as near the purity of
truth as the business before me will admit of," the mind remains entangled
and the shining of the light of life into the soul is obstructed.
Surely
the Lord calls to mourning and deep humiliation that in his fear we may be
instructed and led safely through the great difficulties and perplexities in
this present age. In an entire subjection of our wills the Lord graciously
opens a way for his people, where all their wants are bounded by his wisdom;
and here we experience the substance of what Moses the prophet figured out in
the water of separation as a purification from sin.
Esau
is mentioned as a child red all over like a hairy garment. In Esau is
represented the natural will of man. In preparing the water of separation a red
heifer without blemish, on which there had been no yoke, was to be slain and
her blood sprinkled by the priest seven times towards the tabernacle of the
congregation; then her skin, her flesh, and all pertaining to her, was to be
burnt without the camp, and of her ashes the water was prepared. Thus, the
crucifying of the old man, or natural will, is represented; and hence comes a
separation from that carnal mind which is death. "He who toucheth the dead
body of a man and purifieth not himself with the water of separation, defileth
the tabernacle of the Lord; he is unclean." (Num. xix. 13.)
If
any through the love of gain engage in business wherein they dwell as among the
tombs and touch the bodies of those who are dead should through the infinite
love of God feel the power of the cross of Christ to crucify them to the world,
and therein learn humbly to follow the divine Leader, here is the judgment of
this world, here the prince of this world is cast out. The water of separation
is felt; and though we have been among the slain, and through the desire of
gain have touched the dead body of a man, yet in the purifying love of Christ
we are washed in the water of separation; we are brought off from that
business, from that gain and from that fellowship which is not agreeable to his
holy will. I have felt a renewed confirmation in the time of this voyage, that
the Lord, in his infinite love, is calling to his visited children, so to give
up all outward possessions and means of getting treasures, that his Holy Spirit
may have free course in their hearts and direct them in all their proceedings.
To feel the substance pointed at in this figure man must know death as to his
own will.
"No
man can see God and live." This was spoken by the Almighty to Moses the
prophet and opened by our blessed Redeemer. As death comes on our own wills,
and a new life is formed in us, the heart is purified and prepared to
understand clearly, "Blessed are the pure in heart, for they shall see
God." In purity of heart the mind is divinely opened to behold the nature
of universal righteousness, or the righteousness of the kingdom of God.
"No man hath seen the Father save he that is of God, he hath seen the
Father."
The
natural mind is active about the things of this life, and in this natural
activity business is proposed and a will is formed in us to go forward in it.
And so long as this natural will remains unsubjected, so long there remains an
obstruction to the clearness of Divine light operating in us; but when we love
God with all our heart and with all our strength, in this love we love our
neighbor as ourselves; and a tenderness of heart is felt towards all people for
whom Christ died, even those who, as to outward circumstances, may be to us as
the Jews were to the Samaritans. "Who is my neighbor?" See this
question answered by our Saviour, Luke x. 30. In this love we can say that
Jesus is the Lord; and in this reformation in our souls, manifested in a full
reformation of our lives, wherein all things are new, and all things are of God
(2 Cor. v. 18), the desire of gain is subjected.
When
employment is honestly followed in the light of truth, and people become
diligent in business, "fervent in spirit, serving the Lord" (Rom.
xii. 11), the meaning of the name is opened to us: "This is the name by
which he shall be called, The Lord Our Righteousness." (Jer. xxiii. 6.) O,
how precious is this name! it is like ointment poured out. The chaste virgins
are in love with the Redeemer; and for promoting his peaceable kingdom in the
world are content to endure hardness like good soldiers; and are so separated
in spirit from the desire of riches, that in their employments they become
extensively careful to give no offence, either to Jew or Heathen, or to the
church of Christ.
Thirty-first
of fifth month and first of the week. - We had a meeting in the cabin, with
nearly all the ship's company, the whole being near thirty. In this meeting the
Lord in mercy favored us with the extending of his love.
Second
of sixth month. - Last evening the seamen found bottom at about seventy
fathoms. This morning, a fair wind and pleasant. I sat on deck; my heart was
overcome with the love of Christ, and melted into contrition before him. In
this state the prospect of that work to which I found my mind drawn when in my
native land being, in some degree, opened before me, I felt like a little
child; and my cries were put up to my Heavenly Father for preservation, that in
an humble dependence on him my soul might be strengthened in his love and kept
inwardly waiting for his counsel. This afternoon we saw that part of England
called the Lizard.
Some
fowls yet remained of those the passengers took for their sea-store. I believe
about fourteen perished in the storms at sea, by the waves breaking over the
quarter-deck, and a considerable number with sickness at different times. I
observed the cocks crew as we came down the Delaware, and while we were near
the land, but afterwards I think I did not hear one of them crow till we came
near the English coast, when they again crowed a few times. In observing their
dull appearance at sea, and the pining sickness of some of them, I often
remembered the Fountain of goodness, who gave being to all creatures, and whose
love extends to caring for the sparrows. I believe where the love of God is
verily perfected, and the true spirit of government watchfully attended to, a
tenderness towards all creatures made subject to us will be experienced, and a
care felt in us that we do not lessen that sweetness of life in the animal
creation which the great Creator intends for them under our government.
Fourth
of sixth month. - Wet weather, high winds, and so dark that we could see but a
little way. I perceived our seamen were apprehensive of the danger of missing
the channel, which I understood was narrow. In a while it grew lighter, and
they saw the land and knew where we were. Thus the Father of Mercies was
pleased to try us with the sight of dangers, and then graciously, from time to
time, deliver us from them; thus sparing our lives, that in humility and
reverence we might walk before him and put our trust in him. About noon a pilot
came off from Dover, where my beloved friend Samuel Emlen went on shore and
thence to London, about seventy-two miles by land; but I felt easy in staying
in the ship.
Seventh
of sixth month and first of the week. - A clear morning; we lay at anchor for
the tide, and had a parting meeting with the ship's company, in which my heart
was enlarged in a fervent concern for them, that they may come to experience
salvation through Christ. Had a head-wind up the Thames; lay sometimes at
anchor; saw many ships passing, and some at anchor near; and I had large
opportunity of feeling the spirit in which the poor bewildered sailors too
generally live. That lamentable degeneracy which so much prevails in the people
employed on the seas so affected my heart that I cannot easily convey the
feeling I had to another.
The
present state of the seafaring life in general appears so opposite to that of a
pious education, so full of corruption and extreme alienation from God, so full
of the most dangerous examples to young people that in looking towards a young
generation I feel a care of them, that they may have an education different
from the present one of lads at sea, and that all of us who are acquainted with
the pure gospel spirit may lay this case to heart, may remember the lamentable
corruptions which attend the conveyance of merchandise across the seas, and so
abide in the love of Christ that, being delivered from the entangling expenses
of a curious, delicate, and luxurious life, we may learn contentment with a
little, and promote the seafaring life no further than that spirit which leads
into all truth attends us in our proceedings.
Chapter XII: 1772
Attends the Yearly Meeting in London-Then proceeds towards Yorkshire
Visits Quarterly and other Meetings in the Counties of Hertford, Warwick,
Oxford, Nottingham, York, and Westmoreland-Returns to Yorkshire Instructive
Observations and Letters-Hears of the Decease of William Hunt Some Account of
him-The Author's Last Illness and Death at York.
On
the 8th of sixth month, 1772, we landed at London, and I went straightway to
the Yearly Meeting of ministers and elders, which had been gathered, I suppose,
about half an hour.1
[Footnote
1: There is a story told of his first appearance in England which I have from
my friend, William J. Allinson, editor of the Friend's Review, and which he
assures me is well authenticated. The vessel reached London on the morning of
the fifth day of the week, and John Woolman, knowing that the meeting was then
in session, lost no time in reaching it. Coming in late and unannounced, his
peculiar dress and manner excited attention and apprehension that he was an
itinerant enthusiast. He presented his certificate from Friends in America, but
the dissatisfaction still remained, and some one remarked that perhaps the
stranger Friend might feel that his dedication of himself to this apprehended
service was accepted, without further labor, and that he might now feel free to
return to his home. John Woolman sat silent for a space, seeking the unerring
counsel of Divine Wisdom. He was profoundly affected by the unfavorable
reception he met with, and his tears flowed freely. In the love of Christ and
his fellow-men he had, at a painful sacrifice, taken his life in his hands, and
left behind the peace and endearments of home. That love still flowed out
toward the people of England; must it henceforth be pent up in his own heart?
He rose at last, and stated that he could not feel himself released from his
prospect of labor in England. Yet he could not travel in the ministry without
the unity of Friends; and while that was withheld he could not feel easy to be
of any cost to them. He could not go back as had been suggested; but he was
acquainted with a mechanical trade, and while the impediment to his services
continued he hoped Friends would be kindly willing to employ him in such
business as he was capable of, that he might not be chargeable to any.
A
deep silence prevailed over the assembly, many of whom were touched by the wise
simplicity of the stranger's words and manner. After a season of waiting, John
Woolman felt that words were given him to utter as a minister of Christ. The
spirit of his Master bore witness to them in the hearts of his hearers. When he
closed, the Friend who had advised against his further service rose up and
humbly confessed his error, and avowed his full unity with the stranger. All
doubt was removed; there was a general expression of unity and sympathy, and
John Woolman, owned by his brethren, passed on to his work.
There
is no portrait of John Woolman; and had photography been known in his day it is
not at all probable that the sun-artist would have been permitted to delineate
his features. That, while eschewing all superfluity and expensive luxury, he
was scrupulously neat in his dress and person may be inferred from his general
character and from the fact that one of his serious objections to dyed clothing
was that it served to conceal uncleanness, and was, therefore, detrimental to
real purity. It is, however, quite probable that his outer man, on the occasion
referred to, was suggestive of a hasty toilet in the crowded steerage. - Note
from the edition published by Messrs. Houghton, Mifflin & Co.]
In
this meeting my mind was humbly contrite. In the afternoon the meeting for
business was opened, which by adjournments held near a week. in these meetings
I often felt a living concern for the establishment of Friends in the pure life
of truth. My heart was enlarged in the meetings of ministers, that for
business, and in several meetings for public worship, and I felt my mind united
in true love to the faithful laborers now gathered at this Yearly Meeting. On
the 15th I went to a Quarterly Meeting at Hertford.
First
of seventh month. - I have been at Quarterly Meetings at Sherrington,
Northampton, Banbury, and Shipton, and have had sundry meetings between. My
mind hath been bowed under a sense of Divine goodness manifested among us; my
heart hath been often enlarged in true love, both among ministers and elders
and in public meetings, and through the Lord's goodness I believe it hath been
a fresh visitation to many, in particular to the youth.
Seventeenth.
- I was this day at Birmingham; I have been at meetings at Coventry, Warwick,
in Oxfordshire, and sundry other places, and have felt the humbling hand of the
Lord upon me; but through his tender mercies I find peace in the labors I have
gone through.
Twenty-sixth.
- I have continued travelling northward, visiting meetings. Was this day at
Nottingham; the forenoon meeting was especially, through Divine love, a
heart-tendering season. Next day I had a meeting in a Friend's family, which,
through the strengthening arm of the Lord, was a time to be thankfully
remembered.
Second
of eighth month and first of the week. - I was this day at Sheffield, a large
inland town. I was at sundry meetings last week, and feel inward thankfulness
for that Divine support which hath been graciously extended to me. On the 9th I
was at Rushworth. I have lately passed through some painful labor, but have
been comforted under a sense of that Divine visitation which I feel extended
towards many young people.
Sixteenth
of eighth month and the first of the week, I was at Settle. It hath of late
been a time of inward poverty, under which my mind hath been preserved in a
watchful, tender state, feeling for the mind of the Holy Leader, and I find
peace in the labors I have passed through.
On
inquiry in many places I find the price of rye about five shillings; wheat,
eight shillings per bushel; oatmeal, twelve shillings for a hundred and twenty
pounds; mutton from threepence to fivepence per pound; bacon from sevenpence to
ninepence; cheese from fourpence to sixpence; butter from eightpence to
tenpence; house-rent for a poor man from twenty-five shillings to forty
shillings per year, to be paid weekly; wood for fire very scarce and dear; coal
in some places two shillings and sixpence per hundredweight; but near the pits
not a quarter so much. O, may the wealthy consider the poor!
The
wages of laboring men in several counties toward London at tenpence per day in
common business, the employer finds small beer and the laborer finds his own
food; but in harvest and hay time wages are about one shilling per day, and the
laborer hath all his diet. In some parts of the north of England poor laboring
men have their food where they work, and appear in common to do rather better
than nearer London. Industrious women who spin in the factories get some
fourpence, some fivepence, and so on to six, seven, eight, nine, or ten pence
per day, and find their own house-room and diet. Great numbers of poor people
live chiefly on bread and water in the southern parts of England, as well as in
the northern parts; and there are many poor children not even taught to read.
May those who have abundance lay these things to heart!
Stage-coaches
frequently go upwards of one hundred miles in twenty four hours; and I have
heard Friends say in several places that it is common for horses to be killed
with hard driving, and that many others are driven till they grow blind.
Post-boys pursue their business, each one to his stage, all night through the
winter. Some boys who ride long stages suffer greatly in winter nights, and at
several places I have heard of their being frozen to death. So great is the
hurry in the spirit of this world, that in aiming to do business quickly and to
gain wealth the creation at this day doth loudly groan.
As
my journey hath been without a horse, I have had several offers of being
assisted on my way in these stage-coaches, but have not been in them; nor have
I had freedom to send letters by these posts in the present way of riding, the
stages being so fixed, and one boy dependent on another as to time, and going
at great speed, that in long cold winter nights the poor boys suffer much. I
heard in America of the way of these posts, and cautioned Friends in the
General Meeting of ministers and elders at Philadelphia, and in the Yearly
Meeting of ministers and elders in London, not to send letters to me on any
common occasion by post. And though on this account I may be likely not to hear
so often from my family left behind, yet for righteousness' sake I am, through
Divine favor, made content.
I
have felt great distress of mind since I came on this island, on account of the
members of our Society being mixed with the world in various sorts of traffic,
carried on in impure channels. Great is the trade to Africa for slaves; and for
the loading of these ships a great number of people are employed in their
factories, among whom are many of our Society. Friends in early times refused
on a religious principle to make or trade in superfluities, of which we have
many testimonies on record; but for want of faithfulness, some, whose examples
were of note in our Society, gave way, from which others took more liberty.
Members of our Society worked in superfluities, and bought and sold them, and
thus dimness of sight came over many; at length Friends got into the use of
some superfluities in dress and in the furniture of their houses, which hath
spread from less to more, till superfluity of some kinds is common among us.
In
this declining state many look at the example of others and too much neglect
the pure feeling of truth. Of late years a deep exercise hath attended my mind,
that Friends may dig deep, may carefully cast forth the loose matter and get
down to the rock, the sure foundation, and there hearken to that Divine voice
which gives a clear and certain sound; and I have felt in that which doth not
receive, that if Friends who have known the truth keep in that tenderness of
heart where all views of outward gain are given up, and their trust is only in
the Lord, he will graciously lead some to be patterns of deep self-denial in
things relating to trade and handicraft labor; and others who have plenty of
the treasures of this world will be examples of a plain frugal life, and pay
wages to such as they may hire more liberally than is now customary in some
places.
Twenty-third
of eighth month. - I was this day at Preston Patrick, and had a comfortable
meeting. I have several times been entertained at the houses of Friends, who
had sundry things about them that had the appearance of outward greatness, and
as I have kept inward, way hath opened for conversation with such in private,
in which Divine goodness hath favored us together with heart-tendering times.
Twenty-sixth
of eighth month. - Being now at George Crosfield's, in the county of
Westmoreland, I feel a concern to commit to writing the following uncommon
circumstance.
In
a time of sickness, a little more than two years and a half ago, I was brought
so near the gates of death that I forgot my name. Being then desirous to know
who I was, I saw a mass of matter of a dull gloomy color between the south and
the east, and was informed that this mass was human beings in as great misery
as they could be, and live, and that I was mixed with them, and that henceforth
I might not consider myself as a distinct or separate being. In this state I
remained several hours. I then heard a soft melodious voice, more pure and
harmonious than any I had heard with my ears before; I believed it was the
voice of an angel who spake to the other angels; the words were, "John
Woolman is dead." I soon remembered that I was once John Woolman, and
being assured that I was alive in the body, I greatly wondered what that
heavenly voice could mean. I believed beyond doubting that it was the voice of
an holy angel, but as yet it was a mystery to me.
I
was then carried in spirit to the mines where poor oppressed people were
digging rich treasures for those called Christians, and heard them blaspheme
the name of Christ, at which I was grieved, for his name to me was precious. I
was then informed that these heathens were told that those who oppressed them
were the followers of Christ, and they said among themselves, "If Christ
directed them to use us in this sort, then Christ is a cruel tyrant."
All
this time the song of the angel remained a mystery; and in the morning, my dear
wife and some others coming to my bedside, I asked them if they knew who I was,
and they telling me I was John Woolman, thought I was lightheaded, for I told
them not what the angel said, nor was I disposed to talk much to any one, but
was very desirous to get so deep that I might understand this mystery.
My
tongue was often so dry that I could not speak till I had moved it about and
gathered some moisture, and as I lay still for a time I at length felt a Divine
power prepare my mouth that I could speak, and I then said, "I am
crucified with Christ, nevertheless I live; yet not I, but Christ liveth in me.
And the life which I now live in the flesh I live by the faith of the Son of
God, who loved me and gave himself for me." Then the mystery was opened
and I perceived there was joy in heaven over a sinner who had repented, and
that the language "John Woolman is dead," meant no more than the
death of my own will.
My
natural understanding now returned as before, and I saw that people setting off
their tables with silver vessels at entertainments was often stained with
worldly glory, and that in the present state of things I should take heed how I
fed myself out of such vessels. Going to our Monthly Meeting soon after my
recovery, I dined at a Friend's house where drink was brought in silver
vessels, and not in any other. Wanting something to drink, I told him any case
with weeping, and he ordered some drink for me in another vessel. I afterwards
went through the same exercise in several Friend's houses in America, as well
as in England, and I have cause to acknowledge with humble reverence the
loving-kindness of my Heavenly Father, who hath preserved me in such a tender
frame of mind, that none, I believe, have ever been offended at what I have
said on that subject.
After
this sickness I spake not in public meetings for worship for nearly one year,
but my mind was very often in company with the oppressed slaves as I sat in
meetings; and though under his dispensation I was shut up from speaking, yet
the spring of the gospel ministry was many times livingly opened in me, and the
Divine gift operated by abundance of weeping, in feeling the oppression of this
people. It being so long since I passed through this dispensation, and the
matter remaining fresh and lively in my mind, I believe it safest for me to
commit it to writing.
Thirtieth
of eighth month. - This morning I wrote a letter in substance as follows:
Beloved
Friend, - My mind is often affected as I pass along under a sense of the state
of many poor people who sit under that sort of ministry which requires much
outward labor to support it; and the loving-kindness of our Heavenly Father in
opening a pure gospel ministry in this nation hath often raised thankfulness in
my heart to him. I often remember the conflicts of the faithful under
persecution, and now look at the free exercise of the pure gift uninterrupted
by outward laws, as a trust committed to us, which requires our deepest
gratitude and most careful attention. I feel a tender concern that the work of
reformation so prosperously carried on in this land within a few ages past may
go forward and spread among the nations, and may not go backward through dust
gathering on our garments, who have been called to a work so great and so
precious.
Last
evening during thy absence I had a little opportunity with some of thy family,
in which I rejoiced, and feeling a sweetness on my mind towards thee, I now
endeavor to open a little of the feeling I had there.
I
have heard that you in these parts have at certain seasons Meetings of
Conference in relation to Friends living up to our principles, in which several
meetings unite in one. With this I feel unity, having in some measure felt
truth lead that way among Friends in America, and I have found, my dear friend,
that in these labors all superfluities in our own living are against us. I feel
that pure love towards thee in which there is freedom.
I
look at that precious gift bestowed on thee with awfulness before Him who gave
it, and feel a desire what we may be so separated to the gospel of Christ, that
those things which proceed from the spirit of this world may have no place
among us.
Thy
friend,
John
Woolman.
I
rested a few days in body and mind with our friend, Jane Crosfield, who was
once in America. On the sixth day of the week I was at Kendal, in Westmoreland,
and at Greyrig Meeting the 30th day of the month, and first of the week. I have
known poverty of late, and have been graciously supported to keep in the
patience, and am thankful under a sense of the goodness of the Lord towards
those who are of a contrite spirit.
Sixth
of ninth month and first of the week. - I was this day at Counterside, a large
meeting-house, and very full. Through the opening of pure love, it was a
strengthening time to me, and I believe to many more.
Thirteenth
of ninth month. - This day I was at Leyburn, a small meeting; but, the
towns-people coming in, the house was crowded. It was a time of heavy labor,
and I believe was a profitable meeting. At this place I heard that my kinsman,
William Hunt, from North Carolina, who was on a religious visit to Friends in
England, departed this life on the 9th of this month, of the small-pox, at
Newcastle. He appeared in the ministry when a youth, and his labors therein
were of good savor. He travelled much in that work in America. I once heard him
say in public testimony, that his concern in that visit was to be devoted to
the service of Christ so fully that he might not spend one minute in pleasing
himself, which words, joined with his example, was a means of stirring up the
pure mind in me.
Having
of late often travelled in wet weather through narrow streets in towns and
villages, where dirtiness under foot and the scent arising from that filth which
more or less infects the air of all thickly settled towns were disagreeable;
and, being but weakly, I have felt distress both in body and mind with that
which is impure. In these journeys I have been where much cloth hath been dyed,
and have, at sundry times, walked over ground where much of their dye-stuffs
has drained away. This hath produced a longing in my mind that people might
come into cleanness of spirit, cleanness of person, and cleanness about their
houses and garments.
Some
of the great carry delicacy to a great height themselves, and yet real
cleanliness is not generally promoted. Dyes being invented partly to please the
eye and partly to hide dirt, I have felt in this weak state, when travelling in
dirtiness, and affected with unwholesome scents, a strong desire that the
nature of dyeing cloth to hide dirt may be more fully considered.
Washing
our garments to keep them sweet is cleanly, but it is the opposite to real
cleanliness to hide dirt in them. Through giving way to hiding dirt in our
garments a spirit which would conceal that which is disagreeable is
strengthened. Real cleanliness becometh a holy people; but hiding that which is
not clean by coloring our garments seems contrary to the sweetness of
sincerity. Through some sorts of dyes cloth is rendered less useful. And if the
value of dye-stuffs, and expense of dyeing, and the damage done to cloth, were
all added together, and that cost applied to keeping all sweet and clean, how
much more would real cleanliness prevail.
On
this visit to England I have felt some instructions sealed on my mind, which I
am concerned to leave in writing for the use of such as are called to the
station of a minister of Christ.
Christ
being the Prince of Peace, and we being no more than ministers, it is necessary
for us not only to feel a concern in our first going forth, but to experience
the renewing thereof in the appointment of meetings. I felt a concern in
America to prepare for this voyage, and being through the mercy of God brought
safe hither, my heart was like a vessel that wanted vent. For several weeks
after my arrival, when my mouth was opened in meetings, it was like the raising
of a gate in a water-course when a weight of water lay upon it. In these labors
there was a fresh visitation to many, especially to the youth; but sometimes I
felt poor and empty, and yet there appeared a necessity to appoint meetings. In
this I was exercised to abide in the pure life of truth, and in all my labors
to watch diligently against the motions of self in my own mind.
I
have frequently found a necessity to stand up when the spring of the ministry
was low, and to speak from the necessity in that which subjecteth the will of
the creature; and herein I was united with the suffering seed, and found inward
sweetness in these mortifying labors. As I have been preserved in a watchful
attention to the divine Leader, under these dispensations enlargement at times
hath followed, and the power of truth hath risen higher in some meetings than I
ever knew it before through me. Thus I have been more and more instructed as to
the necessity of depending, not upon a concern which I felt in America to come
on a visit to England, but upon the daily instructions of Christ, the Prince of
Peace.
Of
late I have sometimes felt a stop in the appointment of meetings, not wholly,
but in part: and I do not feel liberty to appoint them so quickly, one after
another, as I have done heretofore. The work of the ministry being a work of
Divine love, I feel that the openings thereof are to be waited for in all our
appointments. O, how deep is Divine wisdom! Christ puts forth his ministers and
goeth before them; and O, how great is the danger of departing from the pure
feeling of that which leadeth safely! Christ knoweth the state of the people,
and in the pure feeling of the gospel ministry their states are opened to his
servants. Christ knoweth when the fruit-bearing branches themselves have need
of purging. O that these lessons may be remembered by me! and that all who
appoint meetings may proceed in the pure feeling of duty!
I
have sometimes felt a necessity to stand up, but that spirit which is of the
world hath so much prevailed in many, and the pure life of truth hath been so
pressed down, that I have gone forward, not as one travelling in a road cast up
and well prepared, but as a man walking through a miry place in which are
stones here and there safe to step on, but so situated that one step being
taken, time is necessary to see where to step next. Now I find that in a state
of pure obedience the mind learns contentment in appearing weak and foolish to
that wisdom which is of the world; and in these lowly labors, they who stand in
a low place and are rightly exercised under the cross will find nourishment.
The gift is pure; and while the eye is single in attending thereto the
understanding is preserved clear; self is kept out. We rejoice in filling up
that which remains of the afflictions of Christ for his body's sake, which is
the church.
The
natural man loveth eloquence, and many love to hear eloquent orations, and if
there be not a careful attention to the gift, men who have once labored in the
pure gospel ministry, growing weary of suffering, and ashamed of appearing
weak, may kindle a fire, compass themselves about with sparks, and walk in the light,
not of Christ, who is under suffering, but of that fire which they in departing
from the gift have kindled, in order that those hearers who have left the meek,
suffering state for worldly wisdom may be warmed with this fire and speak
highly of their labors. That which is of God gathers to God, and that which is
of the world is owned by the world.
In
this journey a labor hath attended my mind, that the ministers among us may be
preserved in the meek, feeling life of truth, where we may have no desire but
to follow Christ and to be with him, that when he is under suffering, we may
suffer with him, and never desire to rise up in dominion, but as he, by the
virtue of his own spirit, may raise us.
The Death Of John Woolman
John Woolman died at York, England, October 7, 1772. His last days are
memorialized in the following extract from "The testimony of Friends in
Yorkshire at their Quarterly Meeting, held at York the 24th and 25th of the
third month, 1773, concerning John Woolman, of Mount Holly, in the Province of
New Jersey, North America, who departed this life at the house of our Friend
Thomas Priestman, in the suburbs of this city, the 7th of the tenth month,
1772, and was interred in the burial-ground of Friends the 9th of the same,
aged about fifty-two years:
"This
our valuable friend having been under a religious engagement for some time to
visit Friends in this nation, and more especially us in the northern parts,
undertook the same in full concurrence and near sympathy with his friends and
brethren at home, as appeared by certificates from the Monthly and Quarterly
Meetings to which he belonged, and from the Spring Meeting of ministers and
elders held at Philadelphia for Pennsylvania and New Jersey.
"He
arrived in the city of London the beginning of the last Yearly Meeting, and,
after attending that meeting, traveled northward, visiting the Quarterly
Meetings of Hertfordshire, Buckinghamshire, Northamptonshire, Oxfordshire, and
Worcestershire, and divers particular meetings in his way.
"He
visited many meetings on the west side of this country, also some in Lancashire
and Westmoreland, from whence he came to our Quarterly Meeting in the last
ninth month, and though much out of health, yet was enabled to attend all the
sittings of that meeting except the last.
"His
disorder, which proved the small-pox, increased speedily upon him, and was very
afflicting, under which he was supported in much meekness, patience, and
Christian fortitude. To those who attended him in his illness, his mind
appeared to be centred in Divine love, under the precious influence whereof we
believe he finished his course, and entered into the mansions of everlasting
rest.
"In
the early part of his illness he requested a Friend to write, and he broke
forth thus:
"'O
Lord my God! the amazing horrors of darkness were gathered around me and
covered me all over, and I saw no way to go forth; I felt the misery of my
fellow-creatures separated from the Divine harmony, and it was heavier than I
could bear, and I was crushed down under it; I lifted up my hand and stretched
out my arm, but there was none to help me; I looked round about and was amazed.
In the depth of misery, O Lord! I remembered that thou art omnipotent, that I
had called thee Father, and I felt that I loved thee, and I was made quiet in
thy will, and I waited for deliverance from thee; thou hadst pity upon me when
no man could help me; I saw that meekness under suffering was showed to us in
the most affecting example of thy Son, and thou taught me to follow him, and I
said, Thy will, O Father, be done.'
"Many
more of his weighty expressions might have been inserted here, but it was
deemed unnecessary, they being already published in print."
Source:
The autobiography of Benjamin Franklin. The journal of John Woolman. Fruits of solitude / William Penn ; with introductions and notes. (New York : P.F. Collier, c1909), Harvard classics, ed. by C. W. Eliot. Vol 1.