THE
ADVENTURES OF HUCKLEBERRY FINN (Tom Sawyer's Comrade) BY MARK TWAIN (Samuel L.
Clemens)
NOTICE
PERSONS
attempting to find a motive in this narra tive will be prosecuted; persons
attempting to find a moral in it will be banished; persons attempting to find a
plot in it will be shot.
BY
ORDER OF THE AUTHOR, Per G.G., Chief of Ordnance.
EXPLANATORY
IN this
book a number of dialects are used, to wit: the Missouri negro dialect; the
extremest form of the backwoods Southwestern dialect; the ordinary "Pike
County" dialect; and four modified varieties of this last. The shadings
have not been done in a hap hazard fashion, or by guesswork; but painstakingly,
and with the trustworthy guidance and support of personal familiarity with
these several forms of speech.
I make
this explanation for the reason that without it many readers would suppose that
all these characters were trying to talk alike and not succeeding.
THE
AUTHOR.
HUCKLEBERRY
FINN
Scene:
The Mississippi Valley Time: Forty to fifty years ago
CHAPTER I.
YOU
don't know about me without you have read a book by the name of The Adventures
of Tom Sawyer; but that ain't no matter. That book was made by Mr. Mark Twain,
and he told the truth, mainly. There was things which he stretched, but mainly
he told the truth. That is nothing. I never seen anybody but lied one time or
another, without it was Aunt Polly, or the widow, or maybe Mary. Aunt Polly --
Tom's Aunt Polly, she is -- and Mary, and the Widow Douglas is all told about
in that book, which is mostly a true book, with some stretchers, as I said
before.
Now the
way that the book winds up is this: Tom and me found the money that the robbers
hid in the cave, and it made us rich. We got six thousand dollars apiece -- all
gold. It was an awful sight of money when it was piled up. Well, Judge Thatcher
he took it and put it out at interest, and it fetched us a dollar a day apiece
all the year round -- more than a body could tell what to do with. The Widow
Douglas she took me for her son, and allowed she would sivilize me; but it was
rough living in the house all the time, considering how dismal regular and
decent the widow was in all her ways; and so when I couldn't stand it no longer
I lit out. I got into my old rags and my sugar-hogshead again, and was free and
satisfied. But Tom Sawyer he hunted me up and said he was going to start a band
of robbers, and I might join if I would go back to the widow and be
respectable. So I went back.
The
widow she cried over me, and called me a poor lost lamb, and she called me a
lot of other names, too, but she never meant no harm by it. She put me in them
new clothes again, and I couldn't do nothing but sweat and sweat, and feel all
cramped up. Well, then, the old thing commenced again. The widow rung a bell for
supper, and you had to come to time. When you got to the table you couldn't go
right to eating, but you had to wait for the widow to tuck down her head and
grumble a little over the victuals, though there warn't really anything the
matter with them, -- that is, nothing only everything was cooked by itself. In
a barrel of odds and ends it is different; things get mixed up, and the juice
kind of swaps around, and the things go better.
After
supper she got out her book and learned me about Moses and the Bulrushers, and
I was in a sweat to find out all about him; but by and by she let it out that
Moses had been dead a considerable long time; so then I didn't care no more
about him, because I don't take no stock in dead people.
Pretty
soon I wanted to smoke, and asked the widow to let me. But she wouldn't. She
said it was a mean practice and wasn't clean, and I must try to not do it any
more. That is just the way with some people. They get down on a thing when they
don't know nothing about it. Here she was a-bothering about Moses, which was no
kin to her, and no use to any body, being gone, you see, yet finding a power of
fault with me for doing a thing that had some good in it. And she took snuff,
too; of course that was all right, because she done it herself.
Her
sister, Miss Watson, a tolerable slim old maid, with goggles on, had just come
to live with her, and took a set at me now with a spelling-book. She worked me
middling hard for about an hour, and then the widow made her ease up. I
couldn't stood it much longer. Then for an hour it was deadly dull, and I was
fidgety. Miss Watson would say, "Don't put your feet up there,
Huckleberry;" and "Don't scrunch up like that, Huckleberry -- set up
straight;" and pretty soon she would say, "Don't gap and stretch like
that, Huckleberry -- why don't you try to be have?" Then she told me all
about the bad place, and I said I wished I was there. She got mad then, but I
didn't mean no harm. All I wanted was to go somewheres; all I wanted was a
change, I warn't particular. She said it was wicked to say what I said; said
she wouldn't say it for the whole world; she was going to live so as to go to
the good place. Well, I couldn't see no advantage in going where she was going,
so I made up my mind I wouldn't try for it. But I never said so, because it
would only make trouble, and wouldn't do no good.
Now she
had got a start, and she went on and told me all about the good place. She said
all a body would have to do there was to go around all day long with a harp and
sing, forever and ever. So I didn't think much of it. But I never said so. I
asked her if she reckoned Tom Sawyer would go there, and she said not by a
considerable sight. I was glad about that, because I wanted him and me to be
together.
Miss
Watson she kept pecking at me, and it got tiresome and lonesome. By and by they
fetched the niggers in and had prayers, and then everybody was off to bed. I
went up to my room with a piece of candle, and put it on the table. Then I set
down in a chair by the window and tried to think of something cheerful, but it
warn't no use. I felt so lonesome I most wished I was dead. The stars were
shining, and the leaves rustled in the woods ever so mournful; and I heard an
owl, away off, who-whooing about some body that was dead, and a whippowill and
a dog cry ing about somebody that was going to die; and the wind was trying to
whisper something to me, and I couldn't make out what it was, and so it made
the cold shivers run over me. Then away out in the woods I heard that kind of a
sound that a ghost makes when it wants to tell about something that's on its
mind and can't make itself understood, and so can't rest easy in its grave, and
has to go about that way every night grieving. I got so down-hearted and scared
I did wish I had some company. Pretty soon a spider went crawling up my
shoulder, and I flipped it off and it lit in the candle; and before I could
budge it was all shriveled up. I didn't need anybody to tell me that that was
an awful bad sign and would fetch me some bad luck, so I was scared and most
shook the clothes off of me. I got up and turned around in my tracks three
times and crossed my breast every time; and then I tied up a little lock of my
hair with a thread to keep witches away. But I hadn't no confidence. You do that
when you've lost a horseshoe that you've found, instead of nailing it up over
the door, but I hadn't ever heard anybody say it was any way to keep off bad
luck when you'd killed a spider.
I set
down again, a-shaking all over, and got out my pipe for a smoke; for the house
was all as still as death now, and so the widow wouldn't know. Well, after a
long time I heard the clock away off in the town go boom -- boom -- boom --
twelve licks; and all still again -- stiller than ever. Pretty soon I heard a
twig snap down in the dark amongst the trees -- something was a stirring. I set
still and listened. Directly I could just barely hear a "me-yow! me
yow!" down there. That was good! Says I, "me yow! me-yow!" as
soft as I could, and then I put out the light and scrambled out of the window
on to the shed. Then I slipped down to the ground and crawled in among the
trees, and, sure enough, there was Tom Sawyer waiting for me.
CHAPTER II.
WE went
tiptoeing along a path amongst the trees back towards the end of the widow's
garden, stooping down so as the branches wouldn't scrape our heads. When we was
passing by the kitchen I fell over a root and made a noise. We scrouched down
and laid still. Miss Watson's big nigger, named Jim, was setting in the kitchen
door; we could see him pretty clear, because there was a light behind him. He
got up and stretched his neck out about a minute, listening. Then he says:
"Who
dah?"
He
listened some more; then he come tiptoeing down and stood right between us; we
could a touched him, nearly. Well, likely it was minutes and minutes that there
warn't a sound, and we all there so close together. There was a place on my
ankle that got to itching, but I dasn't scratch it; and then my ear begun to
itch; and next my back, right between my shoul ders. Seemed like I'd die if I
couldn't scratch. Well, I've noticed that thing plenty times since. If you are
with the quality, or at a funeral, or trying to go to sleep when you ain't
sleepy -- if you are anywheres where it won't do for you to scratch, why you
will itch all over in upwards of a thousand places. Pretty soon Jim says:
"Say,
who is you? Whar is you? Dog my cats ef I didn' hear sumf'n. Well, I know what
I's gwyne to do: I's gwyne to set down here and listen tell I hears it
agin."
So he set
down on the ground betwixt me and Tom. He leaned his back up against a tree,
and stretched his legs out till one of them most touched one of mine. My nose
begun to itch. It itched till the tears come into my eyes. But I dasn't
scratch. Then it begun to itch on the inside. Next I got to itching under
neath. I didn't know how I was going to set still. This miserableness went on
as much as six or seven minutes; but it seemed a sight longer than that. I was
itching in eleven different places now. I reckoned I couldn't stand it more'n a
minute longer, but I set my teeth hard and got ready to try. Just then Jim
begun to breathe heavy; next he begun to snore -- and then I was pretty soon
comfortable again.
Tom he
made a sign to me -- kind of a little noise with his mouth -- and we went
creeping away on our hands and knees. When we was ten foot off Tom whispered to
me, and wanted to tie Jim to the tree for fun. But I said no; he might wake and
make a dis turbance, and then they'd find out I warn't in. Then Tom said he
hadn't got candles enough, and he would slip in the kitchen and get some more.
I didn't want him to try. I said Jim might wake up and come. But Tom wanted to
resk it; so we slid in there and got three candles, and Tom laid five cents on
the table for pay. Then we got out, and I was in a sweat to get away; but
nothing would do Tom but he must crawl to where Jim was, on his hands and
knees, and play something on him. I waited, and it seemed a good while,
everything was so still and lonesome.
As soon
as Tom was back we cut along the path, around the garden fence, and by and by
fetched up on the steep top of the hill the other side of the house. Tom said
he slipped Jim's hat off of his head and hung it on a limb right over him, and
Jim stirred a little, but he didn't wake. Afterwards Jim said the witches be
witched him and put him in a trance, and rode him all over the State, and then
set him under the trees again, and hung his hat on a limb to show who done it.
And next time Jim told it he said they rode him down to New Orleans; and, after
that, every time he told it he spread it more and more, till by and by he said
they rode him all over the world, and tired him most to death, and his back was
all over saddle-boils. Jim was monstrous proud about it, and he got so he
wouldn't hardly notice the other niggers. Niggers would come miles to hear Jim
tell about it, and he was more looked up to than any nigger in that country.
Strange niggers would stand with their mouths open and look him all over, same
as if he was a wonder. Niggers is always talking about witches in the dark by
the kitchen fire; but whenever one was talking and letting on to know all about
such things, Jim would happen in and say, "Hm! What you know 'bout
witches?" and that nigger was corked up and had to take a back seat. Jim
always kept that five-center piece round his neck with a string, and said it
was a charm the devil give to him with his own hands, and told him he could
cure anybody with it and fetch witches whenever he wanted to just by saying
some thing to it; but he never told what it was he said to it. Niggers would
come from all around there and give Jim anything they had, just for a sight of
that five center piece; but they wouldn't touch it, because the devil had had
his hands on it. Jim was most ruined for a servant, because he got stuck up on
account of having seen the devil and been rode by witches.
Well,
when Tom and me got to the edge of the hill top we looked away down into the
village and could see three or four lights twinkling, where there was sick
folks, maybe; and the stars over us was sparkling ever so fine; and down by the
village was the river, a whole mile broad, and awful still and grand. We went
down the hill and found Jo Harper and Ben Rogers, and two or three more of the
boys, hid in the old tanyard. So we unhitched a skiff and pulled down the river
two mile and a half, to the big scar on the hillside, and went ashore.
We went
to a clump of bushes, and Tom made everybody swear to keep the secret, and then
showed them a hole in the hill, right in the thickest part of the bushes. Then
we lit the candles, and crawled in on our hands and knees. We went about two
hundred yards, and then the cave opened up. Tom poked about amongst the
passages, and pretty soon ducked under a wall where you wouldn't a noticed that
there was a hole. We went along a narrow place and got into a kind of room, all
damp and sweaty and cold, and there we stopped. Tom says:
"Now,
we'll start this band of robbers and call it Tom Sawyer's Gang. Everybody that
wants to join has got to take an oath, and write his name in blood."
Everybody
was willing. So Tom got out a sheet of paper that he had wrote the oath on, and
read it. It swore every boy to stick to the band, and never tell any of the
secrets; and if anybody done anything to any boy in the band, whichever boy was
ordered to kill that person and his family must do it, and he mustn't eat and
he mustn't sleep till he had killed them and hacked a cross in their breasts,
which was the sign of the band. And nobody that didn't belong to the band could
use that mark, and if he did he must be sued; and if he done it again he must
be killed. And if anybody that belonged to the band told the secrets, he must
have his throat cut, and then have his carcass burnt up and the ashes scattered
all around, and his name blotted off of the list with blood and never men
tioned again by the gang, but have a curse put on it and be forgot forever.
Everybody
said it was a real beautiful oath, and asked Tom if he got it out of his own
head. He said, some of it, but the rest was out of pirate-books and
robber-books, and every gang that was high-toned had it.
Some
thought it would be good to kill the FAMILIES of boys that told the secrets.
Tom said it was a good idea, so he took a pencil and wrote it in. Then Ben
Rogers says:
"Here's
Huck Finn, he hain't got no family; what you going to do 'bout him?"
"Well,
hain't he got a father?" says Tom Sawyer.
"Yes,
he's got a father, but you can't never find him these days. He used to lay
drunk with the hogs in the tanyard, but he hain't been seen in these parts for
a year or more."
They
talked it over, and they was going to rule me out, because they said every boy
must have a family or somebody to kill, or else it wouldn't be fair and square
for the others. Well, nobody could think of anything to do -- everybody was
stumped, and set still. I was most ready to cry; but all at once I thought of a
way, and so I offered them Miss Watson -- they could kill her. Everybody said:
"Oh,
she'll do. That's all right. Huck can come in."
Then
they all stuck a pin in their fingers to get blood to sign with, and I made my
mark on the paper.
"Now,"
says Ben Rogers, "what's the line of busi ness of this Gang?"
"Nothing
only robbery and murder," Tom said.
"But
who are we going to rob? -- houses, or cattle, or --"
"Stuff!
stealing cattle and such things ain't rob bery; it's burglary," says Tom
Sawyer. "We ain't burglars. That ain't no sort of style. We are high
waymen. We stop stages and carriages on the road, with masks on, and kill the
people and take their watches and money."
"Must
we always kill the people?"
"Oh,
certainly. It's best. Some authorities think different, but mostly it's
considered best to kill them -- except some that you bring to the cave here,
and keep them till they're ransomed."
"Ransomed?
What's that?"
"I
don't know. But that's what they do. I've seen it in books; and so of course
that's what we've got to do."
"But
how can we do it if we don't know what it is?"
"Why,
blame it all, we've GOT to do it. Don't I tell you it's in the books? Do you
want to go to doing different from what's in the books, and get things all
muddled up?"
"Oh,
that's all very fine to SAY, Tom Sawyer, but how in the nation are these
fellows going to be ran somed if we don't know how to do it to them? -- that's
the thing I want to get at. Now, what do you reckon it is?"
"Well,
I don't know. But per'aps if we keep them till they're ransomed, it means that
we keep them till they're dead. "
"Now,
that's something LIKE. That'll answer. Why couldn't you said that before? We'll
keep them till they're ransomed to death; and a bothersome lot they'll be, too
-- eating up everything, and always trying to get loose."
"How
you talk, Ben Rogers. How can they get loose when there's a guard over them,
ready to shoot them down if they move a peg?"
"A
guard! Well, that IS good. So somebody's got to set up all night and never get
any sleep, just so as to watch them. I think that's foolishness. Why can't a
body take a club and ransom them as soon as they get here?"
"Because
it ain't in the books so -- that's why. Now, Ben Rogers, do you want to do
things regular, or don't you? -- that's the idea. Don't you reckon that the
people that made the books knows what's the correct thing to do? Do you reckon
YOU can learn 'em anything? Not by a good deal. No, sir, we'll just go on and
ransom them in the regular way."
"All
right. I don't mind; but I say it's a fool way, anyhow. Say, do we kill the
women, too?"
"Well,
Ben Rogers, if I was as ignorant as you I wouldn't let on. Kill the women? No;
nobody ever saw anything in the books like that. You fetch them to the cave,
and you're always as polite as pie to them; and by and by they fall in love
with you, and never want to go home any more."
"Well,
if that's the way I'm agreed, but I don't take no stock in it. Mighty soon
we'll have the cave so cluttered up with women, and fellows waiting to be
ransomed, that there won't be no place for the rob bers. But go ahead, I ain't
got nothing to say."
Little
Tommy Barnes was asleep now, and when they waked him up he was scared, and
cried, and said he wanted to go home to his ma, and didn't want to be a robber
any more.
So they
all made fun of him, and called him cry baby, and that made him mad, and he
said he would go straight and tell all the secrets. But Tom give him five cents
to keep quiet, and said we would all go home and meet next week, and rob
somebody and kill some people.
Ben
Rogers said he couldn't get out much, only Sundays, and so he wanted to begin
next Sunday; but all the boys said it would be wicked to do it on Sunday, and
that settled the thing. They agreed to get to gether and fix a day as soon as
they could, and then we elected Tom Sawyer first captain and Jo Harper second
captain of the Gang, and so started home.
I clumb
up the shed and crept into my window just before day was breaking. My new
clothes was all greased up and clayey, and I was dog-tired.
CHAPTER III.
WELL, I
got a good going-over in the morning from old Miss Watson on account of my
clothes; but the widow she didn't scold, but only cleaned off the grease and
clay, and looked so sorry that I thought I would behave awhile if I could. Then
Miss Watson she took me in the closet and prayed, but nothing come of it. She
told me to pray every day, and whatever I asked for I would get it. But it
warn't so. I tried it. Once I got a fish-line, but no hooks. It warn't any good
to me without hooks. I tried for the hooks three or four times, but somehow I
couldn't make it work. By and by, one day, I asked Miss Watson to try for me,
but she said I was a fool. She never told me why, and I couldn't make it out no
way.
I set
down one time back in the woods, and had a long think about it. I says to
myself, if a body can get anything they pray for, why don't Deacon Winn get
back the money he lost on pork? Why can't the widow get back her silver
snuffbox that was stole? Why can't Miss Watson fat up? No, says I to my self,
there ain't nothing in it. I went and told the widow about it, and she said the
thing a body could get by praying for it was "spiritual gifts." This
was too many for me, but she told me what she meant -- I must help other
people, and do everything I could for other people, and look out for them all
the time, and never think about myself. This was including Miss Watson, as I
took it. I went out in the woods and turned it over in my mind a long time, but
I couldn't see no advantage about it -- except for the other peo ple; so at
last I reckoned I wouldn't worry about it any more, but just let it go.
Sometimes the widow would take me one side and talk about Providence in a way
to make a body's mouth water; but maybe next day Miss Watson would take hold
and knock it all down again. I judged I could see that there was two
Providences, and a poor chap would stand considerable show with the widow's
Providence, but if Miss Wat son's got him there warn't no help for him any
more. I thought it all out, and reckoned I would belong to the widow's if he
wanted me, though I couldn't make out how he was a-going to be any better off
then than what he was before, seeing I was so ignorant, and so kind of low-down
and ornery.
Pap he
hadn't been seen for more than a year, and that was comfortable for me; I
didn't want to see him no more. He used to always whale me when he was sober
and could get his hands on me; though I used to take to the woods most of the
time when he was around. Well, about this time he was found in the river
drownded, about twelve mile above town, so people said. They judged it was him,
anyway; said this drownded man was just his size, and was ragged, and had
uncommon long hair, which was all like pap; but they couldn't make nothing out
of the face, be cause it had been in the water so long it warn't much like a
face at all. They said he was floating on his back in the water. They took him
and buried him on the bank. But I warn't comfortable long, because I happened
to think of something. I knowed mighty well that a drownded man don't float on
his back, but on his face. So I knowed, then, that this warn't pap, but a woman
dressed up in a man's clothes. So I was uncomfortable again. I judged the old
man would turn up again by and by, though I wished he wouldn't.
We
played robber now and then about a month, and then I resigned. All the boys
did. We hadn't robbed nobody, hadn't killed any people, but only just pre
tended. We used to hop out of the woods and go charging down on hog-drivers and
women in carts taking garden stuff to market, but we never hived any of them.
Tom Sawyer called the hogs "ingots," and he called the turnips and
stuff "julery," and we would go to the cave and powwow over what we
had done, and how many people we had killed and marked. But I couldn't see no
profit in it. One time Tom sent a boy to run about town with a blazing stick,
which he called a slogan (which was the sign for the Gang to get together), and
then he said he had got secret news by his spies that next day a whole parcel
of Spanish merchants and rich A-rabs was going to camp in Cave Hollow with two
hundred elephants, and six hundred camels, and over a thousand
"sumter" mules, all loaded down with di'monds, and they didn't have
only a guard of four hundred soldiers, and so we would lay in ambuscade, as he
called it, and kill the lot and scoop the things. He said we must slick up our
swords and guns, and get ready. He never could go after even a turnip-cart but
he must have the swords and guns all scoured up for it, though they was only
lath and broomsticks, and you might scour at them till you rotted, and then
they warn't worth a mouthful of ashes more than what they was before. I didn't
believe we could lick such a crowd of Spaniards and A-rabs, but I wanted to see
the camels and elephants, so I was on hand next day, Saturday, in the
ambuscade; and when we got the word we rushed out of the woods and down the
hill. But there warn't no Spaniards and A-rabs, and there warn't no camels nor
no elephants. It warn't anything but a Sunday-school picnic, and only a
primer-class at that. We busted it up, and chased the children up the hollow;
but we never got anything but some doughnuts and jam, though Ben Rogers got a
rag doll, and Jo Harper got a hymn-book and a tract; and then the teacher
charged in, and made us drop everything and cut. I didn't see no di'monds, and
I told Tom Sawyer so. He said there was loads of them there, anyway; and he
said there was A-rabs there, too, and elephants and things. I said, why
couldn't we see them, then? He said if I warn't so ignorant, but had read a book
called Don Quixote, I would know without asking. He said it was all done by
enchantment. He said there was hundreds of soldiers there, and elephants and
treasure, and so on, but we had enemies which he called magicians; and they had
turned the whole thing into an infant Sunday school, just out of spite. I said,
all right; then the thing for us to do was to go for the magicians. Tom Sawyer
said I was a numskull.
"Why,"
said he, "a magician could call up a lot of genies, and they would hash
you up like nothing before you could say Jack Robinson. They are as tall as a
tree and as big around as a church."
"Well,"
I says, "s'pose we got some genies to help US -- can't we lick the other
crowd then?"
"How
you going to get them?"
"I
don't know. How do THEY get them?"
"Why,
they rub an old tin lamp or an iron ring, and then the genies come tearing in,
with the thunder and lightning a-ripping around and the smoke a-rolling, and
everything they're told to do they up and do it. They don't think nothing of
pulling a shot-tower up by the roots, and belting a Sunday-school superinten
dent over the head with it -- or any other man."
"Who
makes them tear around so?"
"Why,
whoever rubs the lamp or the ring. They belong to whoever rubs the lamp or the
ring, and they've got to do whatever he says. If he tells them to build a
palace forty miles long out of di'monds, and fill it full of chewing-gum, or
whatever you want, and fetch an emperor's daughter from China for you to marry,
they've got to do it -- and they've got to do it before sun-up next morning,
too. And more: they've got to waltz that palace around over the country
wherever you want it, you understand."
"Well,"
says I, "I think they are a pack of flat heads for not keeping the palace
themselves 'stead of fooling them away like that. And what's more -- if I was
one of them I would see a man in Jericho before I would drop my business and
come to him for the rub bing of an old tin lamp."
"How
you talk, Huck Finn. Why, you'd HAVE to come when he rubbed it, whether you
wanted to or not."
"What!
and I as high as a tree and as big as a church? All right, then; I WOULD come;
but I lay I'd make that man climb the highest tree there was in the
country."
"Shucks,
it ain't no use to talk to you, Huck Finn. You don't seem to know anything,
somehow -- perfect saphead."
I
thought all this over for two or three days, and then I reckoned I would see if
there was anything in it. I got an old tin lamp and an iron ring, and went out
in the woods and rubbed and rubbed till I sweat like an Injun, calculating to
build a palace and sell it; but it warn't no use, none of the genies come. So
then I judged that all that stuff was only just one of Tom Sawyer's lies. I
reckoned he believed in the A-rabs and the elephants, but as for me I think
different. It had all the marks of a Sunday-school.
CHAPTER IV.
WELL,
three or four months run along, and it was well into the winter now. I had been
to school most all the time and could spell and read and write just a little,
and could say the multiplication table up to six times seven is thirty-five,
and I don't reckon I could ever get any further than that if I was to live
forever. I don't take no stock in mathematics, any way.
At
first I hated the school, but by and by I got so I could stand it. Whenever I
got uncommon tired I played hookey, and the hiding I got next day done me good
and cheered me up. So the longer I went to school the easier it got to be. I
was getting sort of used to the widow's ways, too, and they warn't so raspy on
me. Living in a house and sleeping in a bed pulled on me pretty tight mostly,
but before the cold weather I used to slide out and sleep in the woods
sometimes, and so that was a rest to me. I liked the old ways best, but I was
getting so I liked the new ones, too, a little bit. The widow said I was coming
along slow but sure, and doing very satisfactory. She said she warn't ashamed
of me.
One
morning I happened to turn over the salt-cellar at breakfast. I reached for
some of it as quick as I could to throw over my left shoulder and keep off the
bad luck, but Miss Watson was in ahead of me, and crossed me off. She says,
"Take your hands away, Huckleberry; what a mess you are always
making!" The widow put in a good word for me, but that warn't going to
keep off the bad luck, I knowed that well enough. I started out, after
breakfast, feeling worried and shaky, and wondering where it was going to fall
on me, and what it was going to be. There is ways to keep off some kinds of bad
luck, but this wasn't one of them kind; so I never tried to do anything, but
just poked along low-spirited and on the watch-out.
I went
down to the front garden and clumb over the stile where you go through the high
board fence. There was an inch of new snow on the ground, and I seen somebody's
tracks. They had come up from the quarry and stood around the stile a while,
and then went on around the garden fence. It was funny they hadn't come in,
after standing around so. I couldn't make it out. It was very curious, somehow.
I was going to follow around, but I stooped down to look at the tracks first. I
didn't notice anything at first, but next I did. There was a cross in the left
boot-heel made with big nails, to keep off the devil.
I was
up in a second and shinning down the hill. I looked over my shoulder every now
and then, but I didn't see nobody. I was at Judge Thatcher's as quick as I
could get there. He said:
"Why,
my boy, you are all out of breath. Did you come for your interest?"
"No,
sir," I says; "is there some for me?"
"Oh,
yes, a half-yearly is in last night -- over a hundred and fifty dollars. Quite
a fortune for you. You had better let me invest it along with your six
thousand, because if you take it you'll spend it."
"No,
sir," I says, "I don't want to spend it. I don't want it at all --
nor the six thousand, nuther. I want you to take it; I want to give it to you
-- the six thousand and all."
He
looked surprised. He couldn't seem to make it out. He says:
"Why,
what can you mean, my boy?"
I says,
"Don't you ask me no questions about it, please. You'll take it -- won't
you?"
He
says:
"Well,
I'm puzzled. Is something the matter?"
"Please
take it," says I, "and don't ask me noth ing -- then I won't have to
tell no lies."
He
studied a while, and then he says:
"Oho-o!
I think I see. You want to SELL all your property to me -- not give it. That's
the correct idea."
Then he
wrote something on a paper and read it over, and says:
"There;
you see it says 'for a consideration.' That means I have bought it of you and
paid you for it. Here's a dollar for you. Now you sign it."
So I
signed it, and left.
Miss
Watson's nigger, Jim, had a hair-ball as big as your fist, which had been took
out of the fourth stomach of an ox, and he used to do magic with it. He said
there was a spirit inside of it, and it knowed everything. So I went to him
that night and told him pap was here again, for I found his tracks in the snow.
What I wanted to know was, what he was going to do, and was he going to stay?
Jim got out his hair-ball and said something over it, and then he held it up
and dropped it on the floor. It fell pretty solid, and only rolled about an
inch. Jim tried it again, and then another time, and it acted just the same.
Jim got down on his knees, and put his ear against it and listened. But it
warn't no use; he said it wouldn't talk. He said sometimes it wouldn't talk
without money. I told him I had an old slick counterfeit quarter that warn't no
good because the brass showed through the silver a little, and it wouldn't pass
nohow, even if the brass didn't show, because it was so slick it felt greasy,
and so that would tell on it every time. (I reckoned I wouldn't say nothing
about the dollar I got from the judge.) I said it was pretty bad money, but
maybe the hair-ball would take it, because maybe it wouldn't know the
difference. Jim smelt it and bit it and rubbed it, and said he would manage so
the hair-ball would think it was good. He said he would split open a raw Irish
potato and stick the quarter in between and keep it there all night, and next
morning you couldn't see no brass, and it wouldn't feel greasy no more, and so
anybody in town would take it in a minute, let alone a hair-ball. Well, I
knowed a potato would do that before, but I had forgot it.
Jim put
the quarter under the hair-ball, and got down and listened again. This time he
said the hair ball was all right. He said it would tell my whole fortune if I
wanted it to. I says, go on. So the hair ball talked to Jim, and Jim told it to
me. He says:
"Yo'
ole father doan' know yit what he's a-gwyne to do. Sometimes he spec he'll go
'way, en den agin he spec he'll stay. De bes' way is to res' easy en let de ole
man take his own way. Dey's two angels hoverin' roun' 'bout him. One uv 'em is
white en shiny, en t'other one is black. De white one gits him to go right a
little while, den de black one sail in en bust it all up. A body can't tell yit
which one gwyne to fetch him at de las'. But you is all right. You gwyne to
have considable trouble in yo' life, en con sidable joy. Sometimes you gwyne to
git hurt, en sometimes you gwyne to git sick; but every time you's gwyne to git
well agin. Dey's two gals flyin' 'bout you in yo' life. One uv 'em's light en
t'other one is dark. One is rich en t'other is po'. You's gwyne to marry de po'
one fust en de rich one by en by. You wants to keep 'way fum de water as much
as you kin, en don't run no resk, 'kase it's down in de bills dat you's gwyne
to git hung."
When I
lit my candle and went up to my room that night there sat pap -- his own self!
CHAPTER V.
I HAD
shut the door to. Then I turned around. and there he was. I used to be scared
of him all the time, he tanned me so much. I reckoned I was scared now, too;
but in a minute I see I was mistaken -- that is, after the first jolt, as you
may say, when my breath sort of hitched, he being so unexpected; but right away
after I see I warn't scared of him worth bothring about.
He was
most fifty, and he looked it. His hair was long and tangled and greasy, and
hung down, and you could see his eyes shining through like he was behind vines.
It was all black, no gray; so was his long, mixed-up whiskers. There warn't no
color in his face, where his face showed; it was white; not like another man's
white, but a white to make a body sick, a white to make a body's flesh crawl --
a tree-toad white, a fish-belly white. As for his clothes -- just rags, that
was all. He had one ankle resting on t'other knee; the boot on that foot was
busted, and two of his toes stuck through, and he worked them now and then. His
hat was laying on the floor -- an old black slouch with the top caved in, like
a lid.
I stood
a-looking at him; he set there a-looking at me, with his chair tilted back a
little. I set the candle down. I noticed the window was up; so he had clumb in
by the shed. He kept a-looking me all over. By and by he says:
"Starchy
clothes -- very. You think you're a good deal of a big-bug, DON'T you?"
"Maybe
I am, maybe I ain't," I says.
"Don't
you give me none o' your lip," says he. "You've put on considerable
many frills since I been away. I'll take you down a peg before I get done with
you. You're educated, too, they say -- can read and write. You think you're
better'n your father, now, don't you, because he can't? I'LL take it out of
you. Who told you you might meddle with such hifalut'n foolishness, hey? -- who
told you you could?"
"The
widow. She told me."
"The
widow, hey? -- and who told the widow she could put in her shovel about a thing
that ain't none of her business?"
"Nobody
never told her."
"Well,
I'll learn her how to meddle. And looky here -- you drop that school, you hear?
I'll learn people to bring up a boy to put on airs over his own father and let
on to be better'n what HE is. You lemme catch you fooling around that school
again, you hear? Your mother couldn't read, and she couldn't write, nuther,
before she died. None of the family couldn't before THEY died. I can't; and
here you're a-swelling yourself up like this. I ain't the man to stand it --
you hear? Say, lemme hear you read."
I took
up a book and begun something about Gen eral Washington and the wars. When I'd
read about a half a minute, he fetched the book a whack with his hand and
knocked it across the house. He says:
"It's
so. You can do it. I had my doubts when you told me. Now looky here; you stop
that putting on frills. I won't have it. I'll lay for you, my smarty; and if I
catch you about that school I'll tan you good. First you know you'll get
religion, too. I never see such a son.
He took
up a little blue and yaller picture of some cows and a boy, and says:
"What's
this?"
"It's
something they give me for learning my lessons good."
He tore
it up, and says:
"I'll
give you something better -- I'll give you a cowhide.
He set
there a-mumbling and a-growling a minute, and then he says:
"AIN'T
you a sweet-scented dandy, though? A bed; and bedclothes; and a look'n'-glass;
and a piece of carpet on the floor -- and your own father got to sleep with the
hogs in the tanyard. I never see such a son. I bet I'll take some o' these
frills out o' you before I'm done with you. Why, there ain't no end to your
airs -- they say you're rich. Hey? -- how's that?"
"They
lie -- that's how."
"Looky
here -- mind how you talk to me; I'm a standing about all I can stand now -- so
don't gimme no sass. I've been in town two days, and I hain't heard nothing but
about you bein' rich. I heard about it away down the river, too. That's why I
come. You git me that money to-morrow -- I want it."
"I
hain't got no money."
"It's
a lie. Judge Thatcher's got it. You git it. I want it."
"I
hain't got no money, I tell you. You ask Judge Thatcher; he'll tell you the
same."
"All
right. I'll ask him; and I'll make him pungle, too, or I'll know the reason
why. Say, how much you got in your pocket? I want it."
"I
hain't got only a dollar, and I want that to --"
"It
don't make no difference what you want it for -- you just shell it out."
He took
it and bit it to see if it was good, and then he said he was going down town to
get some whisky; said he hadn't had a drink all day. When he had got out on the
shed he put his head in again, and cussed me for putting on frills and trying
to be better than him; and when I reckoned he was gone he come back and put his
head in again, and told me to mind about that school, because he was going to
lay for me and lick me if I didn't drop that.
Next
day he was drunk, and he went to Judge Thatcher's and bullyragged him, and
tried to make him give up the money; but he couldn't, and then he swore he'd
make the law force him.
The
judge and the widow went to law to get the court to take me away from him and
let one of them be my guardian; but it was a new judge that had just come, and
he didn't know the old man; so he said courts mustn't interfere and separate
families if they could help it; said he'd druther not take a child away from
its father. So Judge Thatcher and the widow had to quit on the business.
That
pleased the old man till he couldn't rest. He said he'd cowhide me till I was
black and blue if I didn't raise some money for him. I borrowed three dollars
from Judge Thatcher, and pap took it and got drunk, and went a-blowing around
and cussing and whooping and carrying on; and he kept it up all over town, with
a tin pan, till most midnight; then they jailed him, and next day they had him before
court, and jailed him again for a week. But he said HE was satisfied; said he
was boss of his son, and he'd make it warm for HIM.
When he
got out the new judge said he was a-going to make a man of him. So he took him
to his own house, and dressed him up clean and nice, and had him to breakfast
and dinner and supper with the family, and was just old pie to him, so to
speak. And after supper he talked to him about temperance and such things till
the old man cried, and said he'd been a fool, and fooled away his life; but now
he was a-going to turn over a new leaf and be a man nobody wouldn't be ashamed
of, and he hoped the judge would help him and not look down on him. The judge
said he could hug him for them words; so he cried, and his wife she cried again;
pap said he'd been a man that had always been misunderstood before, and the
judge said he believed it. The old man said that what a man wanted that was
down was sympathy, and the judge said it was so; so they cried again. And when
it was bedtime the old man rose up and held out his hand, and says:
"Look
at it, gentlemen and ladies all; take a-hold of it; shake it. There's a hand
that was the hand of a hog; but it ain't so no more; it's the hand of a man
that's started in on a new life, and'll die before he'll go back. You mark them
words -- don't forget I said them. It's a clean hand now; shake it -- don't be
afeard."
So they
shook it, one after the other, all around, and cried. The judge's wife she
kissed it. Then the old man he signed a pledge -- made his mark. The judge said
it was the holiest time on record, or something like that. Then they tucked the
old man into a beauti ful room, which was the spare room, and in the night some
time he got powerful thirsty and clumb out on to the porch-roof and slid down a
stanchion and traded his new coat for a jug of forty-rod, and clumb back again
and had a good old time; and towards daylight he crawled out again, drunk as a
fiddler, and rolled off the porch and broke his left arm in two places, and was
most froze to death when somebody found him after sun-up. And when they come to
look at that spare room they had to take soundings before they could navigate
it.
The
judge he felt kind of sore. He said he reckoned a body could reform the old man
with a shotgun, maybe, but he didn't know no other way.
CHAPTER VI.
WELL,
pretty soon the old man was up and around again, and then he went for Judge
Thatcher in the courts to make him give up that money, and he went for me, too,
for not stopping school. He catched me a couple of times and thrashed me, but I
went to school just the same, and dodged him or outrun him most of the time. I
didn't want to go to school much before, but I reckoned I'd go now to spite
pap. That law trial was a slow business -- appeared like they warn't ever going
to get started on it; so every now and then I'd borrow two or three dollars off
of the judge for him, to keep from getting a cowhiding. Every time he got money
he got drunk; and every time he got drunk he raised Cain around town; and every
time he raised Cain he got jailed. He was just suited -- this kind of thing was
right in his line.
He got
to hanging around the widow's too much and so she told him at last that if he
didn't quit using around there she would make trouble for him. Well, WASN'T he
mad? He said he would show who was Huck Finn's boss. So he watched out for me
one day in the spring, and catched me, and took me up the river about three
mile in a skiff, and crossed over to the Illinois shore where it was woody and
there warn't no houses but an old log hut in a place where the timber was so
thick you couldn't find it if you didn't know where it was.
He kept
me with him all the time, and I never got a chance to run off. We lived in that
old cabin, and he always locked the door and put the key under his head nights.
He had a gun which he had stole, I reckon, and we fished and hunted, and that
was what we lived on. Every little while he locked me in and went down to the
store, three miles, to the ferry, and traded fish and game for whisky, and
fetched it home and got drunk and had a good time, and licked me. The widow she
found out where I was by and by, and she sent a man over to try to get hold of
me; but pap drove him off with the gun, and it warn't long after that till I was
used to being where I was, and liked it -- all but the cowhide part.
It was
kind of lazy and jolly, laying off comfortable all day, smoking and fishing,
and no books nor study. Two months or more run along, and my clothes got to be
all rags and dirt, and I didn't see how I'd ever got to like it so well at the
widow's, where you had to wash, and eat on a plate, and comb up, and go to bed
and get up regular, and be forever bothering over a book, and have old Miss
Watson pecking at you all the time. I didn't want to go back no more. I had
stopped cussing, because the widow didn't like it; but now I took to it again
because pap hadn't no objec tions. It was pretty good times up in the woods
there, take it all around.
But by
and by pap got too handy with his hick'ry, and I couldn't stand it. I was all
over welts. He got to going away so much, too, and locking me in. Once he
locked me in and was gone three days. It was dreadful lonesome. I judged he had
got drowned, and I wasn't ever going to get out any more. I was scared. I made
up my mind I would fix up some way to leave there. I had tried to get out of
that cabin many a time, but I couldn't find no way. There warn't a window to it
big enough for a dog to get through. I couldn't get up the chimbly; it was too
narrow. The door was thick, solid oak slabs. Pap was pretty careful not to
leave a knife or anything in the cabin when he was away; I reckon I had hunted
the place over as much as a hundred times; well, I was most all the time at it,
because it was about the only way to put in the time. But this time I found
something at last; I found an old rusty wood-saw without any handle; it was
laid in between a rafter and the clapboards of the roof. I greased it up and
went to work. There was an old horse-blanket nailed against the logs at the far
end of the cabin behind the table, to keep the wind from blowing through the
chinks and putting the candle out. I got under the table and raised the
blanket, and went to work to saw a section of the big bottom log out -- big enough
to let me through. Well, it was a good long job, but I was getting towards the
end of it when I heard pap's gun in the woods. I got rid of the signs of my
work, and dropped the blanket and hid my saw, and pretty soon pap come in.
Pap
warn't in a good humor -- so he was his natural self. He said he was down town,
and everything was going wrong. His lawyer said he reckoned he would win his
lawsuit and get the money if they ever got started on the trial; but then there
was ways to put it off a long time, and Judge Thatcher knowed how to do it And
he said people allowed there'd be another trial to get me away from him and
give me to the widow for my guardian, and they guessed it would win this time.
This shook me up considerable, because I didn't want to go back to the widow's
any more and be so cramped up and sivilized, as they called it. Then the old
man got to cussing, and cussed every thing and everybody he could think of, and
then cussed them all over again to make sure he hadn't skipped any, and after
that he polished off with a kind of a general cuss all round, including a
considerable parcel of people which he didn't know the names of, and so called
them what's-his-name when he got to them, and went right along with his
cussing.
He said
he would like to see the widow get me. He said he would watch out, and if they
tried to come any such game on him he knowed of a place six or seven mile off
to stow me in, where they might hunt till they dropped and they couldn't find
me. That made me pretty uneasy again, but only for a minute; I reckoned I
wouldn't stay on hand till he got that chance.
The old
man made me go to the skiff and fetch the things he had got. There was a
fifty-pound sack of corn meal, and a side of bacon, ammunition, and a
four-gallon jug of whisky, and an old book and two newspapers for wadding,
besides some tow. I toted up a load, and went back and set down on the bow of
the skiff to rest. I thought it all over, and I reckoned I would walk off with
the gun and some lines, and take to the woods when I run away. I guessed I
wouldn't stay in one place, but just tramp right across the country, mostly
night times, and hunt and fish to keep alive, and so get so far away that the
old man nor the widow couldn't ever find me any more. I judged I would saw out
and leave that night if pap got drunk enough, and I reckoned he would. I got so
full of it I didn't notice how long I was staying till the old man hollered and
asked me whether I was asleep or drownded.
I got
the things all up to the cabin, and then it was about dark. While I was cooking
supper the old man took a swig or two and got sort of warmed up, and went to
ripping again. He had been drunk over in town, and laid in the gutter all
night, and he was a sight to look at. A body would a thought he was Adam -- he
was just all mud. Whenever his liquor begun to work he most always went for the
govment. his time he says:
"Call
this a govment! why, just look at it and see what it's like. Here's the law
a-standing ready to take a man's son away from him -- a man's own son, which he
has had all the trouble and all the anxiety and all the expense of raising.
Yes, just as that man has got that son raised at last, and ready to go to work
and begin to do suthin' for HIM and give him a rest, the law up and goes for
him. And they call THAT govment! That ain't all, nuther. The law backs that old
Judge Thatcher up and helps him to keep me out o' my property. Here's what the
law does: The law takes a man worth six thousand dollars and up'ards, and jams
him into an old trap of a cabin like this, and lets him go round in clothes
that ain't fitten for a hog. They call that govment! A man can't get his rights
in a govment like this. Sometimes I've a mighty notion to just leave the
country for good and all. Yes, and I TOLD 'em so; I told old Thatcher so to his
face. Lots of 'em heard me, and can tell what I said. Says I, for two cents I'd
leave the blamed country and never come a-near it agin. Them's the very words.
I says look at my hat -- if you call it a hat -- but the lid raises up and the
rest of it goes down till it's below my chin, and then it ain't rightly a hat
at all, but more like my head was shoved up through a jint o' stove pipe. Look
at it, says I -- such a hat for me to wear -- one of the wealthiest men in this
town if I could git my rights.
"Oh,
yes, this is a wonderful govment, wonderful. Why, looky here. There was a free
nigger there from Ohio -- a mulatter, most as white as a white man. He had the
whitest shirt on you ever see, too, and the shiniest hat; and there ain't a man
in that town that's got as fine clothes as what he had; and he had a gold watch
and chain, and a silver-headed cane -- the awful est old gray-headed nabob in
the State. And what do you think? They said he was a p'fessor in a college, and
could talk all kinds of languages, and knowed everything. And that ain't the
wust. They said he could VOTE when he was at home. Well, that let me out.
Thinks I, what is the country a-coming to? It was 'lection day, and I was just
about to go and vote myself if I warn't too drunk to get there; but when they
told me there was a State in this country where they'd let that nigger vote, I
drawed out. I says I'll never vote agin. Them's the very words I said; they all
heard me; and the country may rot for all me -- I'll never vote agin as long as
I live. And to see the cool way of that nigger -- why, he wouldn't a give me
the road if I hadn't shoved him out o' the way. I says to the people, why ain't
this nigger put up at auction and sold? -- that's what I want to know. And what
do you reckon they said? Why, they said he couldn't be sold till he'd been in
the State six months, and he hadn't been there that long yet. There, now --
that's a specimen. They call that a govment that can't sell a free nigger till
he's been in the State six months. Here's a govment that calls itself a
govment, and lets on to be a govment, and thinks it is a govment, and yet's got
to set stock-still for six whole months before it can take a hold of a
prowling, thieving, infernal, white-shirted free nigger, and --"
Pap was
agoing on so he never noticed where his old limber legs was taking him to, so
he went head over heels over the tub of salt pork and barked both shins, and
the rest of his speech was all the hottest kind of language -- mostly hove at
the nigger and the gov ment, though he give the tub some, too, all along, here
and there. He hopped around the cabin con siderable, first on one leg and then
on the other, hold ing first one shin and then the other one, and at last he let
out with his left foot all of a sudden and fetched the tub a rattling kick. But
it warn't good judgment, because that was the boot that had a couple of his
toes leaking out of the front end of it; so now he raised a howl that fairly
made a body's hair raise, and down he went in the dirt, and rolled there, and
held his toes; and the cussing he done then laid over anything he had ever done
previous. He said so his own self after wards. He had heard old Sowberry Hagan
in his best days, and he said it laid over him, too; but I reckon that was sort
of piling it on, maybe.
After
supper pap took the jug, and said he had enough whisky there for two drunks and
one delirium tremens. That was always his word. I judged he would be blind
drunk in about an hour, and then I would steal the key, or saw myself out, one
or t'other. He drank and drank, and tumbled down on his blankets by and by; but
luck didn't run my way. He didn't go sound asleep, but was uneasy. He groaned
and moaned and thrashed around this way and that for a long time. At last I got
so sleepy I couldn't keep my eyes open all I could do, and so before I knowed
what I was about I was sound asleep, and the candle burning.
I don't
know how long I was asleep, but all of a sudden there was an awful scream and I
was up. There was pap looking wild, and skipping around every which way and
yelling about snakes. He said they was crawling up his legs; and then he would
give a jump and scream, and say one had bit him on the cheek -- but I couldn't
see no snakes. He started and run round and round the cabin, hollering
"Take him off! take him off! he's biting me on the neck!" I never see
a man look so wild in the eyes. Pretty soon he was all fagged out, and fell
down panting; then he rolled over and over wonderful fast, kicking things every
which way, and striking and grabbing at the air with his hands, and screaming
and saying there was devils a-hold of him. He wore out by and by, and laid
still a while, moaning. Then he laid stiller, and didn't make a sound. I could hear
the owls and the wolves away off in the woods, and it seemed terri ble still.
He was laying over by the corner. By and by he raised up part way and listened,
with his head to one side. He says, very low:
"Tramp
-- tramp -- tramp; that's the dead; tramp -- tramp -- tramp; they're coming
after me; but I won't go. Oh, they're here! don't touch me -- don't! hands off
-- they're cold; let go. Oh, let a poor devil alone!"
Then he
went down on all fours and crawled off, begging them to let him alone, and he
rolled himself up in his blanket and wallowed in under the old pine table,
still a-begging; and then he went to crying. I could hear him through the
blanket.
By and
by he rolled out and jumped up on his feet looking wild, and he see me and went
for me. He chased me round and round the place with a clasp knife, calling me
the Angel of Death, and saying he would kill me, and then I couldn't come for
him no more. I begged, and told him I was only Huck; but he laughed SUCH a
screechy laugh, and roared and cussed, and kept on chasing me up. Once when I
turned short and dodged under his arm he made a grab and got me by the jacket
between my shoulders, and I thought I was gone; but I slid out of the jacket
quick as lightning, and saved myself. Pretty soon he was all tired out, and
dropped down with his back against the door, and said he would rest a minute
and then kill me. He put his knife under him, and said he would sleep and get
strong, and then he would see who was who.
So he
dozed off pretty soon. By and by I got the old split-bottom chair and clumb up
as easy as I could, not to make any noise, and got down the gun. I slipped the
ramrod down it to make sure it was loaded, then I laid it across the turnip
barrel, pointing towards pap, and set down behind it to wait for him to stir.
And how slow and still the time did drag along.
CHAPTER VII.
RGIT
up! What you 'bout?"
I
opened my eyes and looked around, trying to make out where I was. It was after
sun-up, and I had been sound asleep. Pap was standing over me looking sour and
sick, too. He says:
"What
you doin' with this gun?"
I
judged he didn't know nothing about what he had been doing, so I says:
"Somebody
tried to get in, so I was laying for him."
"Why
didn't you roust me out?"
"Well,
I tried to, but I couldn't; I couldn't budge you."
"Well,
all right. Don't stand there palavering all day, but out with you and see if
there's a fish on the lines for breakfast. I'll be along in a minute."
He
unlocked the door, and I cleared out up the river-bank. I noticed some pieces
of limbs and such things floating down, and a sprinkling of bark; so I knowed
the river had begun to rise. I reckoned I would have great times now if I was
over at the town. The June rise used to be always luck for me; because as soon
as that rise begins here comes cordwood float ing down, and pieces of log rafts
-- sometimes a dozen logs together; so all you have to do is to catch them and
sell them to the wood-yards and the sawmill.
I went
along up the bank with one eye out for pap and t'other one out for what the
rise might fetch along. Well, all at once here comes a canoe; just a beauty,
too, about thirteen or fourteen foot long, riding high like a duck. I shot
head-first off of the bank like a frog, clothes and all on, and struck out for
the canoe. I just expected there'd be somebody lay ing down in it, because
people often done that to fool folks, and when a chap had pulled a skiff out
most to it they'd raise up and laugh at him. But it warn't so this time. It was
a drift-canoe sure enough, and I clumb in and paddled her ashore. Thinks I, the
old man will be glad when he sees this -- she's worth ten dollars. But when I
got to shore pap wasn't in sight yet, and as I was running her into a little
creek like a gully, all hung over with vines and willows, I struck another
idea: I judged I'd hide her good, and then, 'stead of taking to the woods when
I run off, I'd go down the river about fifty mile and camp in one place for
good, and not have such a rough time tramping on foot.
It was
pretty close to the shanty, and I thought I heard the old man coming all the
time; but I got her hid; and then I out and looked around a bunch of willows,
and there was the old man down the path a piece just drawing a bead on a bird
with his gun. So he hadn't seen anything.
When he
got along I was hard at it taking up a "trot" line. He abused me a
little for being so slow; but I told him I fell in the river, and that was what
made me so long. I knowed he would see I was wet, and then he would be asking
questions. We got five catfish off the lines and went home.
While
we laid off after breakfast to sleep up, both of us being about wore out, I got
to thinking that if I could fix up some way to keep pap and the widow from
trying to follow me, it would be a certainer thing than trust ing to luck to
get far enough off before they missed me; you see, all kinds of things might
happen. Well, I didn't see no way for a while, but by and by pap raised up a
minute to drink another barrel of water, and he says:
"Another
time a man comes a-prowling round here you roust me out, you hear? That man
warn't here for no good. I'd a shot him. Next time you roust me out, you
hear?"
Then he
dropped down and went to sleep again; but what he had been saying give me the
very idea I wanted. I says to myself, I can fix it now so nobody won't think of
following me.
About
twelve o'clock we turned out and went along up the bank. The river was coming
up pretty fast, and lots of driftwood going by on the rise. By and by along
comes part of a log raft -- nine logs fast together. We went out with the skiff
and towed it ashore. Then we had dinner. Anybody but pap would a waited and
seen the day through, so as to catch more stuff; but that warn't pap's style.
Nine logs was enough for one time; he must shove right over to town and sell.
So he locked me in and took the skiff, and started off towing the raft about
half past three. I judged he wouldn't come back that night. I waited till I
reckoned he had got a good start; then I out with my saw, and went to work on
that log again. Before he was t'other side of the river I was out of the hole;
him and his raft was just a speck on the water away off yonder.
I took
the sack of corn meal and took it to where the canoe was hid, and shoved the
vines and branches apart and put it in; then I done the same with the side of
bacon; then the whisky-jug. I took all the coffee and sugar there was, and all
the ammunition; I took the wadding; I took the bucket and gourd; I took a
dipper and a tin cup, and my old saw and two blankets, and the skillet and the
coffee-pot. I took fish-lines and matches and other things -- everything that
was worth a cent. I cleaned out the place. I wanted an axe, but there wasn't
any, only the one out at the woodpile, and I knowed why I was going to leave
that. I fetched out the gun, and now I was done.
I had
wore the ground a good deal crawling out of the hole and dragging out so many
things. So I fixed that as good as I could from the outside by scattering dust
on the place, which covered up the smoothness and the sawdust. Then I fixed the
piece of log back into its place, and put two rocks under it and one against it
to hold it there, for it was bent up at that place and didn't quite touch
ground. If you stood four or five foot away and didn't know it was sawed, you
wouldn't never notice it; and besides, this was the back of the cabin, and it
warn't likely anybody would go fooling around there.
It was
all grass clear to the canoe, so I hadn't left a track. I followed around to
see. I stood on the bank and looked out over the river. All safe. So I took the
gun and went up a piece into the woods, and was hunting around for some birds
when I see a wild pig; hogs soon went wild in them bottoms after they had got
away from the prairie farms. I shot this fel low and took him into camp.
I took
the axe and smashed in the door. I beat it and hacked it considerable a-doing
it. I fetched the pig in, and took him back nearly to the table and hacked into
his throat with the axe, and laid him down on the ground to bleed; I say ground
because it was ground -- hard packed, and no boards. Well, next I took an old
sack and put a lot of big rocks in it -- all I could drag -- and I started it
from the pig, and dragged it to the door and through the woods down to the
river and dumped it in, and down it sunk, out of sight. You could easy see that
something had been dragged over the ground. I did wish Tom Sawyer was there; I
knowed he would take an interest in this kind of business, and throw in the
fancy touches. Nobody could spread himself like Tom Sawyer in such a thing as
that.
Well,
last I pulled out some of my hair, and blooded the axe good, and stuck it on
the back side, and slung the axe in the corner. Then I took up the pig and held
him to my breast with my jacket (so he couldn't drip) till I got a good piece
below the house and then dumped him into the river. Now I thought of some thing
else. So I went and got the bag of meal and my old saw out of the canoe, and
fetched them to the house. I took the bag to where it used to stand, and ripped
a hole in the bottom of it with the saw, for there warn't no knives and forks
on the place -- pap done everything with his clasp-knife about the cooking.
Then I carried the sack about a hundred yards across the grass and through the
willows east of the house, to a shallow lake that was five mile wide and full
of rushes -- and ducks too, you might say, in the season. There was a slough or
a creek leading out of it on the other side that went miles away, I don't know
where, but it didn't go to the river. The meal sifted out and made a little
track all the way to the lake. I dropped pap's whetstone there too, so as to
look like it had been done by accident. Then I tied up the rip in the meal sack
with a string, so it wouldn't leak no more, and took it and my saw to the canoe
again.
It was about dark now; so I dropped the canoe down the river under some willows that hung over the bank, and waited for the moon to rise. I made fast to a willow; then I took a bite to eat, and by and by laid down in the canoe to smoke a pipe and lay out a plan. I says to myself, they'll follow the track of that sack ful of rocks to the shore and then drag the river for me. And they'll follow that meal track to the lake and go browsing down the creek that leads out of it to find the robbers that killed me and took the things. They won't ever hunt the river for anything but my d